The Pain Stops
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: MASSACHUSETTS
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The Pain Stops
I was reading the thread of "When the Pain Stops" and thinking 
! What a great thread and this person has such great insight.
I started tho think of some of my "When the Pain Stops". Does anyone else want to give their versiion of when the pain stops? Here are a few of mine.
THE PAIN STOPS
1. When I stop it by deciding not to listen or give into the quacking.
2. When I give up my fantasy that things will be like they were in the beginning and our lives will magically be sane again.
3. When I Let Go and really Let Go.
4. When I STOP thinking those thoughts about the A that cause me the pain and START thinking those thoughts of ME and my FUTURE. My new Life without the chaos.
5. When I finally surrender and move on with my life.
Happy Easter to Everyone. Have a great Day!!
! What a great thread and this person has such great insight.I started tho think of some of my "When the Pain Stops". Does anyone else want to give their versiion of when the pain stops? Here are a few of mine.
THE PAIN STOPS
1. When I stop it by deciding not to listen or give into the quacking.
2. When I give up my fantasy that things will be like they were in the beginning and our lives will magically be sane again.
3. When I Let Go and really Let Go.
4. When I STOP thinking those thoughts about the A that cause me the pain and START thinking those thoughts of ME and my FUTURE. My new Life without the chaos.
5. When I finally surrender and move on with my life.
Happy Easter to Everyone. Have a great Day!!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: MASSACHUSETTS
Posts: 441
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Join Date: May 2005
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 1,637
I agree with your #4... So true for me too. That's the realization I have been working on lately. I don't talk to him but I realized that he was still very present... In my thoughts. And that was really holding me back.
I was hung up thinking about why none of his actions make sense. Well, they made sense for him and what he wants... Not what I want him to want! My expectations and hopes for this marriages... Projecting them out on to him... And then being hurt when he doesn't meet them.
Self-inflicted wounds are the ones that hurt the most.
I was hung up thinking about why none of his actions make sense. Well, they made sense for him and what he wants... Not what I want him to want! My expectations and hopes for this marriages... Projecting them out on to him... And then being hurt when he doesn't meet them.
Self-inflicted wounds are the ones that hurt the most.
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Ashland Oregon
Posts: 256
The pain stops when I:
- Sylvie
- am more genuine in my speech.
- remain true to myself and my values.
- live a God-centered life.
- create my own security.
- accept the challenge of redefining my ideals of partnership.
- stop being afraid of the future.
- Sylvie
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: right here, right now
Posts: 6,516
The pain stops...
... when I really believe myself when I say "I will not accept things from him that I would find unacceptable coming from anyone else."
... when I know, once and for all, where the boundary line between us is.
... when I can stop wondering how my reinforcing and sticking by my boundaries are going to feel inside him.
... when I can stop feeling like a traitor because I prioritized my life.
... when I really believe myself when I say "I will not accept things from him that I would find unacceptable coming from anyone else."
... when I know, once and for all, where the boundary line between us is.
... when I can stop wondering how my reinforcing and sticking by my boundaries are going to feel inside him.
... when I can stop feeling like a traitor because I prioritized my life.
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