Interesting questions...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 44
Interesting questions...
Hi,
Like others who have posted recently, I am one who has not had as hard a road as others. I have not experienced black outs, lost jobs, troubled relationships and so on. Nonetheless, I find myself here and thinking deeply about some of the questions I have seen posed in various threads:
I don't have all the answers yet but this is a short list of the questions that seem to be resonating with me at the moment.
Like others who have posted recently, I am one who has not had as hard a road as others. I have not experienced black outs, lost jobs, troubled relationships and so on. Nonetheless, I find myself here and thinking deeply about some of the questions I have seen posed in various threads:
- What brought you here?
- If not an alcoholic, are you a problem drinker?
- Why have just one, even if you can, given that it opens up the door for more?
- Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there?
- Can you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"?
I don't have all the answers yet but this is a short list of the questions that seem to be resonating with me at the moment.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 15
If you sought out this website then you probably feel like you have a problem , and only you would know. I have never lost a job, never missed a day of work and carry two mortgages and I am a single mother. But just because I function, does not mean I am not an alcoholic. The first step is to admit. Hope this helps. By the way I am new here too, today is my 5th day sober and this forum and the chat rooms have been very beneficial.
rode hard and put away wet
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 999
* What brought you here? I want to get some support for my sobriety and hanging around others has helped me.
* If not an alcoholic, are you a problem drinker? Sometimes I was both simultaneously. How's that for talent?
* Why have just one, even if you can, given that it opens up the door for more? I was never able to have just one. It's pointless to me.
* Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there? I don't drink anymore and haven't for nearly two years.
* Can you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"? There was a very marked progression for me.
* If not an alcoholic, are you a problem drinker? Sometimes I was both simultaneously. How's that for talent?
* Why have just one, even if you can, given that it opens up the door for more? I was never able to have just one. It's pointless to me.
* Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there? I don't drink anymore and haven't for nearly two years.
* Can you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"? There was a very marked progression for me.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 788
* What brought you here? Couldn't keep myself from blacking out and feeling shameful.
* If not an alcoholic, are you a problem drinker? I am an early-stage alcoholic.
* Why have just one, even if you can, given that it opens up the door for more? Exactly.
* Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there? Yes. I got high with a few sips of wine. But it would always (maybe after months) lead to a shameful night.
* Can you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"?
* If not an alcoholic, are you a problem drinker? I am an early-stage alcoholic.
* Why have just one, even if you can, given that it opens up the door for more? Exactly.
* Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there? Yes. I got high with a few sips of wine. But it would always (maybe after months) lead to a shameful night.
* Can you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 12
I am new here, why I am here is immediately below.
I have blacked out many times. It used to be a regular thing in that I would often forget everything. I would often realize that I was missing a whole week of evenings. I was functional at work, but within a half an hour of coming home.... black-o. I even forgot that I had sex with my wife on several occasions. How horrible is that??? Moreover, how much fun must that have been for her???
2 weeks ago my family was out of town and I was looking forward to some 'me time'. This translated into an episode where I actually planned the evening that led to me drinking so much I woke up asleep on the floor next to a pile of my own vomit. I have NEVER done that before and it was the start of a hard week of self awareness that led me to be here.
Of course this defines me as an alcoholic and not just a problem drinker.
Yes, I could still find the high, but I am just now realizing that this high. But this is leading me to a very low bottom. If I don't do something I will be divorced and I will become what I hate in others.
Sorry that this post has been all about me. But I am new and just trying to get a grounding to set up the rest of my life...
I have blacked out many times. It used to be a regular thing in that I would often forget everything. I would often realize that I was missing a whole week of evenings. I was functional at work, but within a half an hour of coming home.... black-o. I even forgot that I had sex with my wife on several occasions. How horrible is that??? Moreover, how much fun must that have been for her???
2 weeks ago my family was out of town and I was looking forward to some 'me time'. This translated into an episode where I actually planned the evening that led to me drinking so much I woke up asleep on the floor next to a pile of my own vomit. I have NEVER done that before and it was the start of a hard week of self awareness that led me to be here.
Of course this defines me as an alcoholic and not just a problem drinker.
Yes, I could still find the high, but I am just now realizing that this high. But this is leading me to a very low bottom. If I don't do something I will be divorced and I will become what I hate in others.
Sorry that this post has been all about me. But I am new and just trying to get a grounding to set up the rest of my life...
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: I'm exactly where I should be.
Posts: 1,889
Sorry that this post has been all about me.
That's how people learn, cbs. It's ok to be 'selfish' in a sense. Recovery is all about each individual. Everyone is on a journey but has a different direction to follow.
Sometimes someone says or askes something that triggers a 'me story' and I run with it. It is therapeudic to release your feelings. It's good to open up. I learn alot about myself by saying stuff I may not want to admit to thinking. If that makes sense. You'd be surprised of the connection between the brain and writing hand.
What brought me here was a vicious cycle of unmanagability and no control over alcohol. It consumed me as a person, as a mother, as a wife. I am separated now and learning to become the person I should have been before my 30 year drinking career.
Definately an alcoholic. Ready and able to admit it to anyone that askes. I am proud of my recovery now and can be honest with myself and others. But I find no one has had the guts to ask!
'One' was not in my drinking vocabulary. Unless we are talking bottles.
No, the high is never reachable. It was always one sip away...
I could honestly say I have seen the progression. I've gone from beer to Jack Daniels to wine to beer to Lord Calvert, to more beer...nothing satisfied me to stop the progression. It was an on going mission.
That's how people learn, cbs. It's ok to be 'selfish' in a sense. Recovery is all about each individual. Everyone is on a journey but has a different direction to follow.
Sometimes someone says or askes something that triggers a 'me story' and I run with it. It is therapeudic to release your feelings. It's good to open up. I learn alot about myself by saying stuff I may not want to admit to thinking. If that makes sense. You'd be surprised of the connection between the brain and writing hand.
What brought me here was a vicious cycle of unmanagability and no control over alcohol. It consumed me as a person, as a mother, as a wife. I am separated now and learning to become the person I should have been before my 30 year drinking career.
Definately an alcoholic. Ready and able to admit it to anyone that askes. I am proud of my recovery now and can be honest with myself and others. But I find no one has had the guts to ask!
'One' was not in my drinking vocabulary. Unless we are talking bottles.
No, the high is never reachable. It was always one sip away...
I could honestly say I have seen the progression. I've gone from beer to Jack Daniels to wine to beer to Lord Calvert, to more beer...nothing satisfied me to stop the progression. It was an on going mission.
Encourager In Training
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: KS
Posts: 717
Originally Posted by EmeraldRose 
Sometimes someone says or askes something that triggers a 'me story' and I run with it.
At least, that's what I tell myself when I launch into a "me" story.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: South Dakota
Posts: 1,061
What brought you here?
I searched the internet for help sites and this one kept coming up.
If not an alcoholic, are you a problem drinker?
My problem is I'm an alcoholic.
Why have just one, even if you can, given that it opens up the door for more?
I can't drink just one, I will find a way to no matter what is takes to keep the booze flowing.
Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there?
I chased being numb and I drank whatever amount required to get me there.
Can you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"?
Started out drinking socially and by the end of my drinking days would drink alone, hide bottles and drink during the day to "take the edge off".
I searched the internet for help sites and this one kept coming up.
If not an alcoholic, are you a problem drinker?
My problem is I'm an alcoholic.
Why have just one, even if you can, given that it opens up the door for more?
I can't drink just one, I will find a way to no matter what is takes to keep the booze flowing.
Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there?
I chased being numb and I drank whatever amount required to get me there.
Can you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"?
Started out drinking socially and by the end of my drinking days would drink alone, hide bottles and drink during the day to "take the edge off".
The New Me starting 1/11/09
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: California
Posts: 678
What brought you here?
Initially, I was looking for a way to work on a program of recovery remotely when I was traveling for business or couldn't get to an AA meeting due to my schedule.
If not an alcoholic, are you a problem drinker?
I don't think it matters to me. My life is so much better now that I stopped drinking.
One of my favorite quotes about the "Am I an alcoholic?" question comes from the book Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp.
"When you question your alcoholism, you say to yourself: If I am an alcoholic, I shouldn't drink and if I'm not an alcoholic, I don't need to. That's a nice piece of logic. You say: People who aren't alcoholics do not lie in bed at two-thirty in the morning wondering if they're alcoholics. A good reality check."
Thank sums it up for me. If there is even a chance that I am a problem drinker or alcoholic, logic would say that I wouldn't do it / think about it / plan for ways to drink, etc. Since I did all these things, it is pretty obvious to me what I am.
Why have just one, even if you can, given that it opens up the door for more?
Exactly. Alcoholic logic has a way of ignoring this concept.
Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there?
Yes, but I had to learn (1) how to get that same high from other activities and (2) lessen my need to have the "high" in my life
Can you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"?
Yes, when I look back objectively, the progression is clear. I used to think that I was a high-functioning alcoholic, but now I realize that HFA isn't a "type" of alcoholic, but rather just a "stage" of alcoholism
Initially, I was looking for a way to work on a program of recovery remotely when I was traveling for business or couldn't get to an AA meeting due to my schedule.
If not an alcoholic, are you a problem drinker?
I don't think it matters to me. My life is so much better now that I stopped drinking.
One of my favorite quotes about the "Am I an alcoholic?" question comes from the book Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp.
"When you question your alcoholism, you say to yourself: If I am an alcoholic, I shouldn't drink and if I'm not an alcoholic, I don't need to. That's a nice piece of logic. You say: People who aren't alcoholics do not lie in bed at two-thirty in the morning wondering if they're alcoholics. A good reality check."
Thank sums it up for me. If there is even a chance that I am a problem drinker or alcoholic, logic would say that I wouldn't do it / think about it / plan for ways to drink, etc. Since I did all these things, it is pretty obvious to me what I am.
Why have just one, even if you can, given that it opens up the door for more?
Exactly. Alcoholic logic has a way of ignoring this concept.
Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there?
Yes, but I had to learn (1) how to get that same high from other activities and (2) lessen my need to have the "high" in my life
Can you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"?
Yes, when I look back objectively, the progression is clear. I used to think that I was a high-functioning alcoholic, but now I realize that HFA isn't a "type" of alcoholic, but rather just a "stage" of alcoholism
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: The Sooner State
Posts: 1,725
What brought you here? I knew I had a problem and needed advice/support. Im glad I did. Had i not I wouldve never gone to AA or "met" some very awesome peopleIf not an alcoholic, are you a problem drinker? im both Why have just one, even if you can, given that it opens up the door for more?
the only time i had just one was...just one before driving to town, just one before going to the movies, just one before heading back to work...Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there? i dont drink daily anymore i have had 4 relapses. before i could drink quite awhil without even a buzz. when i relapsed it took 1 or 2 to get me there. the feeling is sickeningCan you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"? the progression was actively digging my own grave. if i could only put that effort into my recovery i would have this thing whipped by now
the only time i had just one was...just one before driving to town, just one before going to the movies, just one before heading back to work...Is the "high" you chase when drinking achieved anymore? If so, how much does it take to get there? i dont drink daily anymore i have had 4 relapses. before i could drink quite awhil without even a buzz. when i relapsed it took 1 or 2 to get me there. the feeling is sickeningCan you honestly say you have not seen the progression in your drinking in the pursuit of the "high"? the progression was actively digging my own grave. if i could only put that effort into my recovery i would have this thing whipped by now
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