KellyToronto

I always harp on this, but the only thing that calms me down is alcohol.

The liquor closes in around 1 1/2 hours, and I am already dreading getting through the next 8 or 9 hours (I go to sleep late), without my "best friend", namely alcohol, as I have heard many alcoholics refer to alcohol as.

If anyone could even PM private message me, I would really appreciate it...I'm going into a panic attack over having no booze to calm me down tonight.

Kelly

suki44883

Alcohol doesn't really calm you. It depresses your brain. Alcohol is NOT your best friend. Alcohol wants to kill you.

Have you considered going to AA meetings?

KellyToronto

Yes, I KNOW it is a depressant, but, while I am sucking the whisky bottle down my throat (no time for glass and ice), I feel a calmness waving over me...then I continue until blackout and passout.

I need to discuss this with the psychiatrist at Homewood Rehab, this Wednesday.

Kelly

suki44883

Have you considered inpatient rehab?

Opivotal

Hi Kelly...I'm sorry your having such a rough time. Have you talked to your Doctor about quitting? What you will go through etc? I know my life revolved around Alcohol before I quit. I remember very well counting the hours til the store closed. You need to stop the madness before you can get out of its clutches.

Like Suki said it is a depressant. Doesn't feel like that at the time I know , but the end result is worse than when you started.

Stay busy, try to focus on something else. I'm glad your here. Maybe read through the posts on how other people got through it. Go for a walk, take a nice bubble bath, watch a good movie, anything that can distract you.

I'm glad your seeing your Doctor on Wednesday. I wish you the best!

:ghug3

Dee74

I used to think that alcohol was the only thing that calmed me down too Kelly - I conveniently forgot about walking up with a start at 3am wide awake...or the fact I needed more alcohol in the morning to get over the alcohol I'd drank to stay calm last night.

There are better ways to deal with this than alcohol, and I think deep down you know this.

I hope you'll start looking for better healthier ways - talk to doctors and psychs and whoever....do the research now so that next time you feel that way you have something else to fall back on besides alcohol

Alcohol - The Worst Treatment For Anxiety

D

artsoul

Try to remember you'll only get relief for a couple hours and than the misery sets in. When you wake up tomorrow, you'll feel terrible and you'll still have the cravings (maybe even worse than you do now). What will you do then? I know you know all this and it's still hard not to pick up....... but you will get through it and each time you do, it's another step in right direction.

Be patient with yourself. Eat something. Cry or scream if you have to...... read posts for the next 8 hours...... tie your hands behind your back (just kidding)... just know that you're investing in a new life and getting free from this as you move forward. You can do it!

Hugs and prayers................

MsCooterBrown

Early on I had to concentrate on the aftershocks of drinking. And Dee hit it..waking up with a start at 3AM and not be able to go back to sleep. Its similar to post tramatic stress...I was jumping at every noise in the end. Also dry heaves..drove me nuts. Think about how much better you will feel in the morning..really..it does get better. I hope you can hang in there..I wish you the best..

Missy7

Why do we wake up at 3:00? That's the time for me too. And I always drink to calm down. Always. Also to feel natural. And I need less and less to feel sick the next day. Don't fall for it. I hope neither of us falls for it.

EmeraldRose

You always harp on it because you're an alcoholic and that's the only means we know of calming down and relaxing.
I am on day 80 today and have learned that calming does not come from a liquid it comes from within. I've had alot of situations that could drive me to drink since my husband and I are separated, I did get a job but haven't started yet, I still am trying to rehome my goats, etc etc....it all builds up and I'd just love to sit down with a nice bottle of whiskey and just forget everything. But ya know what? I'm too far in...I'm living a sober life now...my parents are proud of me, my brother is supportive, I have AA, I have after care, I have a nice little house and 2 nice little dogs.
Why screw it up? LOL I hope you can calm without the alcohol. It is just so not worth it.
Think of what you can do to remain sober instead of what you can do to be drinking.

Anna

Kelly,

You can learn new ways to calm yourself. Yoga, meditation, exercise, reading - all things that can help you to relax.

And, yes 3AM, I would have HORRIBLE anxiety, but I would do it again the next day.

MsCooterBrown

Why do we wake up at 3:00? That's the time for me too. And I always drink to calm down. Always. Also to feel natural. And I need less and less to feel sick the next day. Don't fall for it. I hope neither of us falls for it.

I used to think it was creepy waking up at 3AM on the dot nightly...then..when I sobered up I still did it..came to find out it was the newspaper delivery guy. He delivers at that time and the sound of his car always wakes me. But in a drunken stooper..I thought there was something eerie about it. Didn't realize it was him!