not been going to meetings
Earth Child
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Edinburgh, Scotland
Posts: 2,004
not been going to meetings
I havent been at an AA meeting since Thursday because of my social anxiety...i dont feel like i want to drink or anything.
but i could do with some support ....i feel like i should stay away from AA as i think its just puts drink in my mind by talking about it some how ...i dont know
Mentally am not good at all think am going to hit people ... spoke to my psych in the past about it she said that am in control and because am worried about it means am not going to hit people ....but i feel out of control at the moment.
I would talk to my sponsor but mentally she isnt good either right now.
Am scared to leave the house right now ... was meant to be at a meeting this morning but changed my mind about going.
I dont know what is up with me at the moment...i guess am stuck in a rut or something
but i could do with some support ....i feel like i should stay away from AA as i think its just puts drink in my mind by talking about it some how ...i dont know
Mentally am not good at all think am going to hit people ... spoke to my psych in the past about it she said that am in control and because am worried about it means am not going to hit people ....but i feel out of control at the moment.
I would talk to my sponsor but mentally she isnt good either right now.
Am scared to leave the house right now ... was meant to be at a meeting this morning but changed my mind about going.
I dont know what is up with me at the moment...i guess am stuck in a rut or something
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Roxboro, NC
Posts: 544
I haven't been to one in over a week either Willow. I'm not suffering from social anxiety or anything, jut haven't been willing to make the trip. I live 40 minutes away from the meetings.
I've spent a lot more time here and posting here. It's keeping me grounded. Hope it will do the same for you.
Stay strong!
I've spent a lot more time here and posting here. It's keeping me grounded. Hope it will do the same for you.
Stay strong!
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: near Toronto, Ontario
Posts: 377
40
Yes 40 meetings = long drive for a meeting.
I haven't been to one since last Thursday, should get to one soon.
Yes, sometimes meetings make me FOCUS ON alcohol, not good, I can relate.
I hope the rehab centre has good books on alcoholism; they have a library there we can go to.
Kelly
I haven't been to one since last Thursday, should get to one soon.
Yes, sometimes meetings make me FOCUS ON alcohol, not good, I can relate.
I hope the rehab centre has good books on alcoholism; they have a library there we can go to.
Kelly
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Go to a meeting even though you don't "feel like it". Even though you "aren't comfortable".
If you don't like the meeting find one that focuses on the solution, not the problem.
Good luck!
If you don't like the meeting find one that focuses on the solution, not the problem.
Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Atlanta, Ga
Posts: 55
i have had issues with social anxiety before... its not fun. but you have to just make yourself do stuff even though you dont want to. just like dgillz said. be proud of yourself for every step you take... if you drive to a meeting, and dont go in, thats ok. be proud that you drove there. the next time maybe you will go in. you will not feel the way you feel right now forever.
good luck.
good luck.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 270
Originally Posted by dgillz 
Go to a meeting even though you don't "feel like it". Even though you "aren't comfortable".
If you don't like the meeting find one that focuses on the solution, not the problem.
Good luck!
If you don't like the meeting find one that focuses on the solution, not the problem.
Good luck!
She stated that the meetings make her think about drinking, which happens to a lot of people. Many drink right after the meeting !
Willow, hang around on here until you calm down some if this is more comfortable for you.
Perhaps your husband can help?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
Originally Posted by JohnBarleycorn
Why should she go to a meeting even though she isn't comfortable?
Originally Posted by Icarus10
Day 1 again. I've been back at this point so many times. It really is a curse. Quite frankly I need help. I keep attempting sobriety alone and continuously fail. I've made it 2-3 months several times in the last 2 years, but always end up falling off the wagon. Those periods of sobriety are truly bright periods in my life, so why I would turn back to this darkness is a mystery to me.
For years, I tried to maintain sobriety by being comfortable. I would try to arrange my life in such a way that I wouldn't be tempted, wouldn't be stressed, wouldn't have to face unpleasant situations, and most of all, wouldn't have to feel unpleasant feelings.
The result of all that effort was exactly like the quote I posted. More Day 1s, over and over.
When I ran out of the will and desire to keep fighting, when I ran out of the capacity to continue living like that for another day, it was suggested to me that I take certain actions in order to recover for good. None of those actions struck me as comfortable, and most of them weren't. They required a lot of discomfort for me.
But those actions, in spite of the discomfort they caused, led to being recovered and an ending of that sober/relapse cycle that so many experience.
Earth Child
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Edinburgh, Scotland
Posts: 2,004
I dont have a therapist and i cant afford one at the moment ....the wait on the NHS is years long.
the only medical professional i see is my dr ...i have been discharged from my psychiatrist.
the only medical professional i see is my dr ...i have been discharged from my psychiatrist.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 82
I can't afford one either right now but I'm working on it and made it a top priority. Maybe you should too?
If you're not comfortable in going to meetings, maybe you have a friend or family member that you could talk to in the meanwhile? Someone who knows what recovery is about.
Make a plan, set yourself goals to reach. At least try to do something. It's always hard to break up patterns and change things but we just have to do it if we're going to recover.
If you're not comfortable in going to meetings, maybe you have a friend or family member that you could talk to in the meanwhile? Someone who knows what recovery is about.
Make a plan, set yourself goals to reach. At least try to do something. It's always hard to break up patterns and change things but we just have to do it if we're going to recover.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 567
Try to make the effort to go to a variety of meeting types, such as Big Book studies meetings, Steps workshops. I know some meetings have guest speakers, usually those who have recovered or have a recovery story to share.
If you go Big Book meetings and are asked to read, do so and even if you don't want to share, the miracle may occur while reading. It does happen, from my own experience in early sobriety, Big Book meetings sort of link one day to the next simply by what I read spontaneoulsy. Others shared on the section of the Big Book they read and answers came through them even they did not know what was happening in my own living. Rather divine, something that can't really be explained.
But yeah, try a variety of meeting types and don't give up, keep going, we all have had similar experiences along the way.
If you go Big Book meetings and are asked to read, do so and even if you don't want to share, the miracle may occur while reading. It does happen, from my own experience in early sobriety, Big Book meetings sort of link one day to the next simply by what I read spontaneoulsy. Others shared on the section of the Big Book they read and answers came through them even they did not know what was happening in my own living. Rather divine, something that can't really be explained.
But yeah, try a variety of meeting types and don't give up, keep going, we all have had similar experiences along the way.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,236
I too know the feeling you are having. Sometimes
it feels like it paralyzes you. Today we dont have to
be held prisoners because of that anxiety.
I learned that my anxiety was due to a chemical
embalance in my system. With taking the proper
route to address this anxiety, today im better at
being around others. However not cured, just better.
I still dont like being around alot of people but its
tolerable.
Working a program of recovery has kept me sober
for a number of yrs now. In early recovery I did go
to many many meetings even when I didnt want to.
Id tell myself that if i went to any lengths to get a drink
including getting out in terrible weather, then I should
make the effort to make a meeting because that could
mean life or death for me.
I enjoyed going to speaker meetings where someone
stands infront of a podium and tells their story for an hour.
We just sit and listen to the words of hope. To me that
kind of meeting was a more relaxed kind to go.
Then the other meetings id attend, i baked goodies and
bring them to all my meetings in a way to make myself go.
I say to myself, I need to feed my friends and they look
forward to having something to nibble on with their coffee.
This also allowed them to get to know the lady who brought
those goodies and to say thank you.
That to me was my service work for a long time.
Today, i go once in awhile to outside meeting but continue
to share my own experiences strengths and hopes with those
still suffering right here in SR.
As long as I dont stop working my program on a daily
bases then Im granted another 24 hours sober.
Simplicity and honesty is good eneough for me.
it feels like it paralyzes you. Today we dont have to
be held prisoners because of that anxiety.
I learned that my anxiety was due to a chemical
embalance in my system. With taking the proper
route to address this anxiety, today im better at
being around others. However not cured, just better.
I still dont like being around alot of people but its
tolerable.
Working a program of recovery has kept me sober
for a number of yrs now. In early recovery I did go
to many many meetings even when I didnt want to.
Id tell myself that if i went to any lengths to get a drink
including getting out in terrible weather, then I should
make the effort to make a meeting because that could
mean life or death for me.
I enjoyed going to speaker meetings where someone
stands infront of a podium and tells their story for an hour.
We just sit and listen to the words of hope. To me that
kind of meeting was a more relaxed kind to go.
Then the other meetings id attend, i baked goodies and
bring them to all my meetings in a way to make myself go.
I say to myself, I need to feed my friends and they look
forward to having something to nibble on with their coffee.
This also allowed them to get to know the lady who brought
those goodies and to say thank you.
That to me was my service work for a long time.
Today, i go once in awhile to outside meeting but continue
to share my own experiences strengths and hopes with those
still suffering right here in SR.
As long as I dont stop working my program on a daily
bases then Im granted another 24 hours sober.
Simplicity and honesty is good eneough for me.
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