To Understand,
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 2
To Understand,
Hi there.
Let me just start off by saying that I'm not an alcoholic, or a substance abuser, or anything that really dictates me being on this board. The reason I'm here is to understand, and I've learned from past experience that learning to understand where someone is coming from, is to hear something from someone who's experienced it.
My boyfriend of nine months is still living with his father, who is an extreme alcoholic and substance abuser. Is there anywhere in here I can post for support or some insight into why people do this?
Much appreciated,
Epiphany
Let me just start off by saying that I'm not an alcoholic, or a substance abuser, or anything that really dictates me being on this board. The reason I'm here is to understand, and I've learned from past experience that learning to understand where someone is coming from, is to hear something from someone who's experienced it.
My boyfriend of nine months is still living with his father, who is an extreme alcoholic and substance abuser. Is there anywhere in here I can post for support or some insight into why people do this?
Much appreciated,
Epiphany
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,429
Hi epiphany
I don't believe anyone chooses to become addicted, but a lot of us find ourselves that way and then don't know exactly how to get out, or maybe we're too scared, or maybe we've convinced ourselves no problem exists....
why do you think it's important for you to know why your boyfriends father is this way, epiphany?
D
I don't believe anyone chooses to become addicted, but a lot of us find ourselves that way and then don't know exactly how to get out, or maybe we're too scared, or maybe we've convinced ourselves no problem exists....
why do you think it's important for you to know why your boyfriends father is this way, epiphany?
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 2
Hi there D,
First, thank you for your response. Any one offering comments is completely helpful at this time.
Personally, I want to understand it because my boyfriend is constantly under his father's stress. Tim (my boyfriend) comes home from work to his father, who is usually under the influence all day, and accuses and calls out his son. I just don't understand why he feels the need to drink all the time, and why when he drinks he lashes out at his eldest (Tim), and three other younger children he has, ages 9-13.
First, thank you for your response. Any one offering comments is completely helpful at this time.
Personally, I want to understand it because my boyfriend is constantly under his father's stress. Tim (my boyfriend) comes home from work to his father, who is usually under the influence all day, and accuses and calls out his son. I just don't understand why he feels the need to drink all the time, and why when he drinks he lashes out at his eldest (Tim), and three other younger children he has, ages 9-13.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,429
I'm sorry.
That's obviously not an ideal situation for ether Tim or his younger siblings to be in.
It's often futile to apply logic to addiction - like I said before none of us wanted to become addicts - and I know myself I never wanted to behave badly...but I did - time and again.
There's very little you (or anyone) can do about someone else's problem tho.
Noone could do anything for me - I had to admit there was a problem first...and then I had to want to do something about it.
Have you checked out our family and friends forums as well? you'll find lots of people there dealing with alcoholic loved ones.
Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
D
That's obviously not an ideal situation for ether Tim or his younger siblings to be in.
It's often futile to apply logic to addiction - like I said before none of us wanted to become addicts - and I know myself I never wanted to behave badly...but I did - time and again.
There's very little you (or anyone) can do about someone else's problem tho.
Noone could do anything for me - I had to admit there was a problem first...and then I had to want to do something about it.
Have you checked out our family and friends forums as well? you'll find lots of people there dealing with alcoholic loved ones.
Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
D
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