Vesna

I'm on Day 5 following a relapse on Sunday. Today I'm physically feeling much better (although still tired)...but I am just PISSED. In the mad way, not the drunk way. I'm at work and every little thing seems to rub me the wrong way...people seem to be talking VERY loudly (probably no more loudly than normal), everyone wants something from me, etc., etc. I have a high-pressure executive job and am normally pretty even-keeled. Is this still part of withdrawal from the relapse? When I feel annoyed I'm trying to stop, breathe, walk around, write in my journal for a few minutes if necessary. It's just very unlike me to be so MAD!

I'm working the SMART program and it's a great help, and I feel that overall my recovery is on track. Up until today I've been feeling happier by the minute, SO grateful that nothing bad happened, and hopeful for the future. I am just flummoxed where this sudden horrible mood today might be coming from!

When can I expect withdrawal to be *really* over? I had not been drinking regularly...relapsed after several weeks on Sunday night with 10+ glasses of wine and, predictably, felt like crap physically and mentally for a couple days.

silly

Vesna,
I'm around 50 days sober and I still have way too many days like the one you're describing. It's such a long and difficult process but we need to accept the fact that it takes some real time to get through the worst part. It took most of us a long, long time to get TO the worst part!
What makes me feel better? I try to think about how I'd feel on this same day if I'd been up late drinking last night and feeling hung over. I'd still be irritated and annoyed and I'd also be sick and nonproductive. Plus I'd be worried that someone would realize I'm hung over and call me out of my behavior, most likely pointing out that I was the same way yesterday or the day before or the day before that.

SSIL75

I certainly had days like that in early recovery. Totally normal, IME. I wish I had kept notes so I know when things stabilized. I have 7 months now and it feels like I have felt good and stable for a long time. I'm thinking the initial roller-coaster wrapped up in about 4 maybe 6 weeks?

least

My emotions stabilized pretty well after a couple months of sobriety. Emotions being all over the map is pretty common. Keep yourself occupied and find something to do to keep you 'grounded'.

Anna

This is my take on it. It was unlike me to be angry or easily irritated. I thought I was a pretty even keel person. People told me I was. When I began recovery, I realized how much anger and other negative emotions I had been pushing down and numbing with alcohol. The feelings definitely made themselves known to me and I had to learn how to deal with them. I was a newcomer in learning how not to be frustrated and annoyed by people and life.

You will get used to it as time goes by, and it sounds like you're doing the right things in helping yourself.

Ainslie

I feel like this a lot during the day (at 2.5 yrs sober) - the smallest things seem to **** me off. I cant take meds during the day, but I find aromatherapy quite beneficial - sandalwood incense is great but I understand you may not be able to burn that in your office, you could try the essential oil on your wrists/temples and also drinking green/chamomile tea is good.

Hope I dont sound like a deranged hippy. These things work for me though.

yeahgr8

I was like this for a year when i stopped drinking for that period of time, eventually it became too much and i drank again...

I don't know much about SMART but hopefully the program will effect a drastic change in you enough so that you will not have the anger inside anymore:-)

shreeshree

I know what your feeling I relapsed my self a few days ago. But it is getting easier today to deal with what happen. Although I feel this anger in me as well. It's Saturday and I have the strength to get through today with the help from a HP and a meeting tonight. You will too!

micealc

When I got away from Drink and Drugs,and eventually thru in the towel after Slips,Re Habs,Dts,Sick of Been Sick,.........thats when I started the real recovery of myself.What made me drink and Drug............Anger,Resentment,Jealousey,Low Self Asteem,Lack of Control,Abandonment,and much more.I attended AA for a good few years,and im now attending ACA.I was deeply Hurt before I ever picked up a Drink.
My biggest Anger was towards my Father,I wanted to Kill him.
Thank God I did not,..........for the last 10 years of his life I got to love a different man,and that was because I had changed,Using Steps,HP,Program Friends etc.Im still not fully content with my lot,but Im still working on me.Cheers.