Real life...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 76
Real life...
One thing that I have learnt 'this time round' is that the happy newly sober feeling do not stay and 'real life' kicks in.
Y'know like the looking around with a clear head and feeling guilt free. Hearing the birds, looking at the blue sky and stuff.
It goes. Or at least it's not so strong. I think before when it went I always felt cheated. Like, if I'm not going to have that feeling then what's the point? Pretty stupid huh?!
I realised since then that it's just real life.
I also figured out something else. I am a very determined, stubborn and strong person and THATS the reason why I can't give up. I kept thinking if I'm so determined etc why can't I do this, but it's because of it.
I will always try and make something work if I really want it. Even if it's no good for me. I will try and try and try... And I guess that's what I've been doing (for 15 years), I just keep trying to make this work.
Just thought I would share my thoughts with you guys. I love SR, it's such a cool place and has such cool people!!
Y'know like the looking around with a clear head and feeling guilt free. Hearing the birds, looking at the blue sky and stuff.
It goes. Or at least it's not so strong. I think before when it went I always felt cheated. Like, if I'm not going to have that feeling then what's the point? Pretty stupid huh?!
I realised since then that it's just real life.
I also figured out something else. I am a very determined, stubborn and strong person and THATS the reason why I can't give up. I kept thinking if I'm so determined etc why can't I do this, but it's because of it.
I will always try and make something work if I really want it. Even if it's no good for me. I will try and try and try... And I guess that's what I've been doing (for 15 years), I just keep trying to make this work.
Just thought I would share my thoughts with you guys. I love SR, it's such a cool place and has such cool people!!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,438
I didn't want to be an alcoholic. My pride and stubborness were happy to get behind that idea....but I nearly killed myself that way.
I'm really glad I accepted things. I'm an alcoholic.
It got immediately easier then.
I've have a lot of ups and downs in my life since I got sober - but everything is easier to bear sober - and thats not an empty platitude.
I hope you'll find out the truth of that C
I'm really glad I accepted things. I'm an alcoholic.
It got immediately easier then.
I've have a lot of ups and downs in my life since I got sober - but everything is easier to bear sober - and thats not an empty platitude.
I hope you'll find out the truth of that C
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 245
I am an amateur on spirituality, but this Bible verse (Ecclesiastes 3:1) has served me greatly whenever real life gives me a slap in the face.
1There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven ~
2 A time to give birth, and a time to die; A time to plant, and a time to uproot what is planted.
3 A time to kill, and a time to heal; A time to tear down, and a time to build up.
4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; A time to mourn, and a time to dance.
5 A time to throw stones, and a time to gather stones; A time to embrace, and a time to shun embracing.
6 A time to search, and a time to give up as lost; A time to keep, and a time to throw away.
7 A time to tear apart, and a time to sew together; A time to be silent, and a time to speak.
8 A time to love, and a time to hate; A time for war, and a time for peace.
1There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven ~
2 A time to give birth, and a time to die; A time to plant, and a time to uproot what is planted.
3 A time to kill, and a time to heal; A time to tear down, and a time to build up.
4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; A time to mourn, and a time to dance.
5 A time to throw stones, and a time to gather stones; A time to embrace, and a time to shun embracing.
6 A time to search, and a time to give up as lost; A time to keep, and a time to throw away.
7 A time to tear apart, and a time to sew together; A time to be silent, and a time to speak.
8 A time to love, and a time to hate; A time for war, and a time for peace.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,504
I didn't get a 'pink cloud' feeling when I stopped drinking because I was so unhappy with myself and the mess that I'd made of my life. I do know that life comes along and it's not always easy, but I find that remembering what I can control (my reactions) and what I can't control (everything else) really helps a lot.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
Posts: 217
I am definitely experiencing the "pink cloud" (9 days). Everything looks so crisp and new sober. I'm starting to see positive physical and mental changes.
A little worried how I'll be when it wears off. In the meantime, hope to become more and more determined with each day, so I'll be strong when it wears off.
There is no option for me.
Life vs Death
Family vs Alcohol
Now I realize how selfish I was and what I put my family through. A good family is like having a priceless, beautiful crystal sculpture and dinging with a hammer (alcohol) on a regular basis. The sculpture is marred, but hopefully with care the dings will mellow out to be a beautiful patina.
A little worried how I'll be when it wears off. In the meantime, hope to become more and more determined with each day, so I'll be strong when it wears off.
There is no option for me.
Life vs Death
Family vs Alcohol
Now I realize how selfish I was and what I put my family through. A good family is like having a priceless, beautiful crystal sculpture and dinging with a hammer (alcohol) on a regular basis. The sculpture is marred, but hopefully with care the dings will mellow out to be a beautiful patina.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 76
A few days ago while at work I had a customer get really angry with me. I won't go into it. She was an idiot but it wasn't nice.
I would normally have got really drunk after something like that. It's just a coping thing that I have done since I was 14 or 15 (now 36) It's like any feelings I don't like... pain, boredom, stress... I drink to cover it up. I didn't do it that night, I had some tea at my mums instead and vented about what had happened.
That was a little bit of progress I think. Not getting carried though, I know what I'm like.
I would normally have got really drunk after something like that. It's just a coping thing that I have done since I was 14 or 15 (now 36) It's like any feelings I don't like... pain, boredom, stress... I drink to cover it up. I didn't do it that night, I had some tea at my mums instead and vented about what had happened.
That was a little bit of progress I think. Not getting carried though, I know what I'm like.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 665
I used to be a bartender. In my case, the customer was never right! Good job finding alternatives to coping with...well...everything. Stress is a big trigger for me, but then so is boredom, pain, joy, etc.
New to Real Life
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: I come in Peaces
Posts: 2,071
Originally Posted by crisplover 
A few days ago while at work I had a customer get really angry with me. I won't go into it. She was an idiot but it wasn't nice.
I would normally have got really drunk after something like that. It's just a coping thing that I have done since I was 14 or 15 (now 36) It's like any feelings I don't like... pain, boredom, stress... I drink to cover it up. I didn't do it that night, I had some tea at my mums instead and vented about what had happened.
That was a little bit of progress I think. Not getting carried though, I know what I'm like.
I would normally have got really drunk after something like that. It's just a coping thing that I have done since I was 14 or 15 (now 36) It's like any feelings I don't like... pain, boredom, stress... I drink to cover it up. I didn't do it that night, I had some tea at my mums instead and vented about what had happened.
That was a little bit of progress I think. Not getting carried though, I know what I'm like.
I am much more even keeled since I sobered up. I have bad days of course (I have 2 small children and I'm 8 mos pregnant
) but I have found, and I hope you find too, that what used to be catastrophic events in my life are now small things. Just a bad day. Nothing some comfy pj's, a chat and/or a movie can't get me through. Of course there will be bigger problems to come. But I'm surprised at how surmountable everyday stresses really are when I'm not chronically exhausted/hungover!
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