LS2

Ahhhhh, I feel so stuck. And almost like giving up!!! I could just cry.

My stupid past with exA...It's not his fault, mine. Which I don't blame him for my actions/choices. When we first met I was 19 and not too smart about money and of course i believed everything exA had to say since he was 28. Soo I ruined my credit, wrote bad checks. So, here I am 25 and didn't qualify for the apartment...and they won't even accept me if I get a co-signer, or if I have Housing assistance. Grrrr... I am sure there are other places, but it is such a small town and the housing asst. won't approve any housing that has lead paint if your kids are under six.

Back to square one in the search for a place to live.

Shellcrusher

I smoked my credit in college. It takes a little time but with hard work, you can fix it. Keep your chin up. Accept that the past happened and now you have the chance to fix it.

Buffalo66

You will find a place that will accept you.
NO, its not his fault, but you made those choices when you were under an influence of a different kind than alcohol.

Pick up, dust off, and keep moving. Life changes when we change.
Keep moving!

pixilation

Some advice given to me...

look for sublets, small-time landlords, etc. Anything to get your rental history looking better.

nodaybut2day

Aww man, that blows. I feel your pain. I had to declare bankruptcy while I was married to XAH because of the bad choices I made (ok also because XAH spent our money like water). My credit is STILL crummy though I'm working hard to improve it.

you'll find someplace...this is just a minor setback.

*hugs*

hello-kitty

That's a good thing.

GettingBy

Big hugs to you LS2! It's a tough spot you're in. I was there about 10 years ago. I had *wrecked* my credit in grad school by failing to file deferment papers for my federal student loans. It was awful. Embarassing. I hated admitting to people what I had done.

Those people at stores when they ask you - "Would you like to apply for a store charge?" ... made me want to vomit and cry because I knew I would never be approved.

But... life goes on. You learn from this and grow. It's not going to be easy, but nothing worthwhile is. One day at a time, you pay your bills on time, you build your credit and 4-5 years from now you can look back and be proud of what you accomplished.

Have faith that your HP will take care of you. Keep searching for a place and don't be afraid to ask for help. Do you have friends that can help you out in the meantime?

zrx1200R

a small set back. Don't lose sight of the prize. There are options. Mobile homes, heck even RVs. Don't knock it. You may have to go that route for a while. It is not the end of the world.

Independent land lords are an excellent idea. Tell them up front. They may jack the rent up a bit or ask for a bigger deposit.

Suggest telling them how much you like the place. then stroke them a little. Mention how you can see they are just the kind of landlord you want, because you can see by the excellent care and shape of the property they are doing a great job. Explain how it is just the right size, etc. Then explain your situation.

Try to make a new friend who is interested in helping you. you have nothing to lose.

theuncertainty

Oh, man. I'm sorry Lindsey. It sucks. I actually had one lady tell me "I don't know what to tell you but make more money." Really?! Is that all? Sh-t. Why didn't I think of that?!

I (obviously) had to keep looking and actually found a pretty great little place, even if it didn't have a yard - the landlord only had one building. He was much more concerned with me having a steady job than the credit history (XAH and I had declared bankruptcy just a couple years before). My employer gave glowing accolades. It probably didn't hurt matters that the landlord had just gone through the process to evict several 'partier' tenants and was looking for some one more settled and quiet.

You'll find a place, Lindsey. Your HP is looking out for you.

LexieCat

Agreed, you will find a place. It may not be exactly what you want, but you won't be there forever. You may luck out and find something better than what you just applied for.

You might want to apply for a secured credit card and start making on-time payments for that. I'm told that's the quickest way to jump-start rebuilding your credit history.

It will get better, PROMISE.

Hugs,

ItsmeAlice

Hang in there! You never know the path that will lead you home until you wind up on it.

I, too, wrecked some seriously sweet credit from the time I met my EX. By the time we split I had a bankruptcy to my record and had a rock bottom credit score. He walked away smelling like a rose. Grrr. Like you, I had to accept those were my choices from doing what I thought was right at the time. Now I know better and now I do better.

Fast forward 3 years later, and I have brought my credit score back up to almost as it was - yes it can be done even with a bankruptcy - and I am on the cusp of buying my own home even with only making a meager salary.

I'm in a small town outside of a metropolitan area and the US Department of Agriculture offers grants for low income, low score housing loans. I was in the same position you are. I couldn't qualify for an apartment because of my income even though I had a good score by that time and couldn't afford the high rents anyway and still have enough for food etc. Owning a home for me is actually better than half the cost of renting especially considering the subsidies USDA offers.

Check them out online for your area. Maybe you will find some benefit there like I did.

I also had great luck checking out modest homes for sale sitting vacant and called realtors to see if their clients would be interested in renting or renting to own. I found more than one promising opportunity that way, but ended up finding the USDA grants and decided to go for my own place.

Hope my story inspires you to keep trying!

Alice

lillamy

You know, another thought -- check Catholic Charities and other faith-based services. My neighbors lost their house and didn't have a penny to their names, and, of course, shot credit. A faith-based charity took them on and guaranteed their rent on a sliding percentage for the next 6 months (first month, the charity paid the rent; they pay less and less each month until the family is standing on their own),

If you can find the support of an organization like that, it might be easier?

LS2

Thank you all! That rental was probably one of the most expensive in this area and it is quite more than our monthly house payment. I will look around more..I even had a lady from my alanon offer for me and the kids to come stay with her for a little bit. I am sure I'll find something!

exA keeps asking when I am moving out and I was so mad and told him I didn't qualify. For dumb, so now he was wondering if were just going to stay and not talk to eachother...?

People usually don't move in the winter, so since spring is coming I have a better chance of finding a place.

I just want things to happen right now, I feel better knowing places I can go if I need to

Thanks for all the suggestions and support!

DMC

I have a rental property (because I can't sell it - but it's not in MN) and my last 2 tenants have been people/families with steady jobs, good references but crappy credit. It's a sign of the times, and it doesn't take much.

I'm losing good tenants to good karma (a relative died and left them a house), but hopefully I can find someone. Good luck.

pixilation

Are you in a college town? where I am, there are 3 colleges, and all of the college rentals are starting to be advertised now, so there's an idea too.

Drive around in areas you like too, I found one rental that isn't in the paper/craigslist, just a sign out in front of the building.

blwninthewind

WellsFargo has a secured credit card program. they don't advertise it but if you go talk to a banker they will explain it to you. It's relatively easy to get and will help rebuild your credit.

It will work out...keep praying. God has a plan for you.