LeadHatter

i have come to realize that a part of me thinks it highly likely that i will fail in my efforts to succeed in life.

quite what to do about that i don't know

bummer

spryte

It depends on how you define success and failure.

And how you deal with obstacles.

Don't be too hard on yourself. Something might not work out, but other things are possible.

LeadHatter

cheers i was considering to look up failure and define other outcomes, just been to synonyms.com and found flunk - for some reason that doesn't seem as bad as failing

Stimmed

Naa Kev...

Just keep with your sobriety efforts, keep banging your drum... and things just start to fall into place. Things seem to get better, because they are better. This helps maintain a more positive attitude and can become second nature as the Alcoholic way of thinking starts to fade. Then it seems as if your eyes become open, able to deal with more and cope better.
Its usually a long way off, but you can get there trust me.
Heck! just look at all the evidence here on this site!
Recovery has given no end of people a better life, from better attitude, that Alcohol was allowed to destroy.
A life in Sobriety presents endless opertunities rite there for the taking, and you will be in a much better position to see them.

Chin up mate, as you move forward :-)

LaFemme

One thing that has been very important to my recovery is that I work at my life now. It is up to me whether I sink or swim and I will do everything I can to ensure a positive outcome.

When I quit I was so wrecked inside I wasn't even sure I wanted to paint anymore...my lifetime dream had lost its appeal. Today I have commissions, a studio, a bunch of spec pieces under way. I am experimenting and having fun with it. It isn't supporting me yet but its moving in the right direction...more importantly my passion is back. It didn't happen overnight. It didn't happen without personal work and growth.

Sober you have a chances at life...but its still up to you.

LeadHatter

im lonely thats making me want to use alcohol right now and i cant handle myself in the chatroom not sure what to do

Stimmed

Thats the one! Tho you prob' refer to your Art here, im sure you agree that your 'passion & appetite' for life itself is back through prolonged sobriety?

@Kev

Give/Allow it time... you wont look back in the same way. Thats sayin if you do... you'll be too busy!

artsoul

It's hard to feel stuff at first - loneliness and boredom are two biggies for us. The thing is you can drink and still feel lonely (you just don't care quite as much temporarily).

The first few months all I did was put one foot in front of the other and stay sober. Things kept getting better though, and I take pride in myself today. The rewards are there - keep going kevin!:ghug3

Stimmed

Hmmm...

Well i doubt you on a desert island peddling like something 'rabid' to power your PC!
All you need is rite outside your door!
Get used to the new you
Get a hobby, meet folk through it
Maybe over step the mark with your confidence, who knows it mite work...
if no, you tried... you'll still have options.

Chatroom success? 'pfff...'

Anyway you on a learning curve with plenty of obsticals, and you will constantly find new ways at dealing with them.

Dunno what else to say really Kev... just get some plans drawn up in your nut and crack on. gl :-)

LeadHatter

thanks everyone i guess im about ready to add pride to my long character flaw list.

thats whats stopped me from getting to aa!

[ps im ok now had a shower and a think] just guess im not used to asking for help all the time - if i was gazing and pornographic images or downing cans of lager well thats what i used to do to deal with lonliness not ask for help!!!!