Punch

I've been giving this some thought in recent days, or at least, why am I an alcoholic? I realise there are a million and one different circumstances which might lead to someone finding themselves in this scenario, however I've been trying to explore the reasons behind my own arrival here. And I'd be interested to get your thoughts.

I suppose there are some common theories:

- Psychological flaws
- Physiological flaws
- Social flaws

Each of these may apply to some more than others, but my issue with them is they place the blame upon 'something' outside of the control of the individual. I experienced some tough times a few years ago, and I learned that as a person, you are responsible for making your own luck and your own mistakes.

I didn't used to be an alcoholic. I am today. But it's not like I went to bed one night in control of my drinking and woke up an alcoholic. For me, it was a series of bad decisions and mistakes over a number of years that brought me here. Yeah, I had a tough childhood. I had a tough adolescence and a tough introduction to adulthood, but so did plenty of people who aren't alcoholics.

But I am, and they aren't. I made myself the way am. It's nobody's fault but mine. Not my dad's, not my mum's, not God's, not anyone's but mine. But then all of those bad times I've mentioned above; which include abuse as a child and homelessness as a young adult, I've dealt with pretty well. My life, aside from my relationship with booze and its associated effects is good.

And I'll deal with this.

But anyway, I'm just interested to understand the take of other's on their situation, and how it might differ to my own.

Thanks!

Dee74

Hi Punch

I had to give up asking that question - not only could I not find a comprehensive answer, but waiting to find the answer was stopping me from doing something about the problem.

I do agree the buck stops with me tho - whatever psychological, emotional, situational, social or genetic factors were involved, I made some mistakes - and I'm a big one for being responsible for my mistakes

D

Ghostly

Nope...there's officially only a million again. That last one was proven to be false.

I tend to not be a very philosophical person. I usually find pretty straight forward reasons for things. Tends to make me a pretty boring conversationalist.

I think some people have addictive personalities. That may be based on some mental health issues like depression, or maybe things that happened in their lives, or both. Alcohol fills this void.

For me, alcohol helped me sleep. Also, around the same time I started drinking I had some other stressful things going on. Hence...I drank a lot. I clearly have moderation problems. Food, alcohol and many other things. In many ways I'm kind of an all or nothing person. If I have one peanut butter cup, I'll eat the whole bag. So best for me to avoid a lot of things all together.

Good luck finding your answers.

Mark75

Certainly being actively alcoholic is being flawed... But I don't buy the idea that there is some essential flaw... We were born with the nervous system we have. I was born curious... And ultimately like a moth to a flame... But I am not flawed. Neither, do I think that you are... Hmm... God (well mine anyway) made us in his image... Evolution or creation... Whatever... But we came to be.

Acceptance.

LexieCat

It really doesn't matter to me. What good does it do me to know "why"? Will knowing it's biological get me sober? Will finding some flaw in my personality make me sober? Will finding something in my experiences make me sober?

All I really care about is getting well. I found a way to do that.

julez

I'm not gonna even start in about my OWN issues....

However, I would like to share something about my husband... He is a heavy drinker. Can drink every day, or can leave it. Can have 3 beers and can be happy, or can get hammered and be happy. Alcohol doesn't cause him any problems. Not in his life outside this house, or inside it. He wakes up happy and ready for the day, no matter what happened the night before.
He clearly does NOT have the physiological disposition for alcoholism. I truly believe that. He's a lucky guy.
I had some stressful stuff in my life, I drank about it, and developed cravings, and was unable to moderate my consumption. Beginning to end lasted 2 1/2 years.
I am different than my husband is. Not because I want to be, or don't want to be, I just AM.
And once I figured that out, once and for all, I realized that drinking isn't an option for me.

Supercrew

Well here is why I know I am.

I finally came to the conclusion that drinking was a learned response, and much like Pavlov's dog, as soon as the thought of drinking came to mind I associated it with fun, relaxation, good times, prosperity, youth, sex and every good and fun thing I have ever done. That response to the thought of alcohol made it impossible for me to ever even contemplate life without it. That response was ingrained in me for the last 27 years. So basically it wasn't a situation or a problem or a specific group of people that triggered me to drink, it was the thought of drinking that was the trigger that got the chemicals moving in my brain.

Now millions of people all over the world have similar thoughts regarding alcohol and they are able to lead productive lives. But when I found out that my body reacts to alcohol differently than most, and that I am truly allergic to the thing that I have basically had ingrained on my brain as the greatest thing in the world, and the thought of it alone makes my adrenaline pump and makes me find it and pour it down my throat that is the reason that I would continue to drink even when I knew what the consequences would be.

Before I truly thought I was an alcoholic and before I did the hours of research I have done over the last 6 months on my problem, it was still a mystery to me why I always had to drink like a wild man, even though I knew damn well the hell I was gonna be in when the hangover the next day was coming, so I reprogrammed my brain further to look forward to the next day so I could start drinking again.

If I never learned how to love drinking I would have never had this problem, or if I wasn't born with the alcoholic gene this might have never been a problem. But when you have been programmed to love drinking, and when you weren't born with an off switch, this is where a true alcoholic is formed.

If I was born 20 years earlier and the information I have been able to read wasn't available to me I really don't think I would have been able to figure out that my biggest drinking trigger was the thought of drinking itself. Without this knowledge I would have had to think my obsession was something unexplainable and maybe i would have looked for spiritual help. But, at least in my case, the reason why I didn't quit drinking even when it was stupid and caused problems and caused pain is because my brain had been programmed so strongly to feel positive about all aspects of alcohol that no matter what the situation I would still feel good about drinking it.

Stimmed

Welcome Punch.

Yes we are who we are.
The world is full of weird and wonderful things. Some, one could see, hear, touch, taste and inhale. All produce mind altering effects. It is the mind change that once can be controlled, saught at will depending on will.
Say you are in a place you dont really like...
you move... Things are different.


Aggghhh i dont like the way i feel rite now, (shot, wine, etc)
hmmm... things are'nt so bad after all, i'll do that again.

Its possible that one is nit alcohol dependent but just, used to the way they try to get out of certain situations they are uncomfortable with.

I say this because i dont think it is wise to cotegorise oneself as one thing or another until they have acually been diagnosed as being such. Sure one could have these thoughts and seek advise and prevent something from happening. Each person is unique to their surroundings first off and daily enviroment.

I, heh also did not used to be an alcoholic, it developed from an age of 15, and is still with me, like all the others here, recovering or no. until you are medically described as bing such i would'nt race into it to quickly. Forgive me if you already have been told so.
Some people can become alcoholics and some simply cannot, or will not.

Having said that welcome to SR, it is an excellent place to start stopping what evr vice one has.

Good luck

reggiewayne

I think we're alcoholics because we really like the affects of alcohol. Seems to be much more than the "normal" drinker. For me, alcohol was my solution for life. It helped my feel better, think better, get girls better, be funnier, be happier, and basically could change my reality. If I was unhappy or lonely I could drink some alcohol and suddenly I viewed the world differently

The problem is all of these positive things came at a huge price. They were also very fleeting. The positives soon gave way to the negatives. The negatives then became to outweigh the positives by a larger margin. Soon, the positives were few and far between. Then the negatives were all I had. It was at that point I had to drink to deal with all of the negative consequences that the booze caused. Pretty silly right! Dealing with negative feelings by using the very substance that caused them.

I know we all try and find the magic bullet for this question. Bad childhood, divorced parents, over protective parents, no parents, great parents, blah blah blah. Ever noticed that depending on the person telling the story the circumstances on why they drink are unique to them? Could it be because they are pinning their shortcomings on any and everything around them?

Bottom line, I drank so much because ultimately I loved the way alcohol made me feel. I loved it so much I abused the daylights out of it until the solution then became the problem.

Today I think very little on why I'm an alcoholic.

Raindance

I became addicted to a substance that I was using to self medicate myself.

I now have other means of handling those situations and no longer need alcohol in my life.