cj2011

Hi. My most recent decision to become sober was about 45 minutes ago. It took me that long to beg for forgiveness to the most recent person I hurt, and clear the fridge of any temptation. I felt bad about not giving my provisions away to a friend, but I felt I really needed the concrete experience of trashing the booze.

I am a good drinker. Very functional. That is why I have never truly thought I had a problem. Work? Check. School? Check. Daily call to the parents? Check. Gym? Check. Still, I can find time to be drunk for 48 hours straight. It seems I spend the week putting the pieces back together, and the weekend destroying them. Of course, more recently, I have consumed during the week, thus infinging upon my safety net. Things are going downhill, so I think it is time to take control before I am completely owned by little brown bottles.

I've never actually had a sobriety date before. I am truly enjoying the novelty. And, its potential to get me back on track.

2-12-11.

There it is. What now?

grateful101010

Welcome. Spend time here in SR. It's what's kept me sober for 4 months now. SR is always real and human, it's the joy and sorrow of life. People here are funny and smart. Stay here.

Zig210

I am new as well...you will get lots of support here. I hit my bottom after the super bowl....woke up and I was just disgusted with myself. So...this is Day 6 for me...hang in there, and most of all...stick to your guns! I was on a downward spiral and had to really know what I was headed for...disaster. Welcome.

cj2011

Thanks for the welcome, and the good advice: "stay here".

cj2011

You will always be 6 days older than me. Good work, and thanks for the welcome.

FrothyJay

What now?

That depends. Do you think you can stay stopped on your own?

Alcoholics can not. Hard drinkers who need to stop-- they can. But alcoholics-- not so much.

And the most maddening thing of all-- there are plenty of hopeless alcoholics who also diligently go to school, work and the gym.

But when they drink alcohol-- all bets are off.

Do you think you're powerless, or that you can do this with willpower?

cj2011

Well, I suppose I should review the facts. I have never quit drinking successfully on my own. The law has stopped me on several occasions. My horrible conscience on many, many occasions. Of course, the evil deeds that triggered my sobriety slowly faded from memory, and I could innocently hold a beer again.

I cannot give you an honest answer, mostly because I am bias; or, perhaps, I am afraid of the answer. No, not the answer, but the required action. More likely, I have just become very good at lying to myself.

Dee74

Hi cj

You've made a good choice

What now? I hope you'll stick around.

I read as much as I could and got as many viewpoints as possible - then I decided what I was going to do.

The people here will give you a lot of support - welcome

D

Charlotte75

Hi. Welcome. I've just been on here for three days...and have only not drank for three days. Obviously, I still don't really know what I'm doing and have no words of wisdom to give you, but the people on here are very insightful, supportive and kind. As someone pointed out to me, they're the same kind of people with whom you liked to drink. Which makes so much sense.

Just wanted to tell you that I've always considered myself a "good drinker" too. I finished school, pay my bills, go to work and talk to my mother. I've found that a lot of people on here were similarly "very functional" but also similarly very unhappy. I think I would have drank last night if I hadn't had the SR support.

I truly hope the best for you.

Robertson

I am also new to this forum and already find it such a help. I have been sober for 3 days now. My last drink was Thursday night, completely bombed and horribly hung over and sick the next day, missing work, wondering who I hit on, etc, etc. I also consider myself a 'good drinker'. I have always surrounded myself with buddies who like to drink and drink a lot. I prided myself on being able to say no when they were saying yes so that when it came time for me to drink, it was time to celebrate my 'willpower' by getting smashed. Or here's another one: since I've been good lately about only having one glass of wine with diner and have been working really hard and do a good job, this night out with the boys will be different and hey, that's what guys do on occasion. All of this leads to a very ugly and increasingly (I'm 40 now) dangerous evening (got into a cab accident - not wearing seat belt) that leads to days of misery for myself and my wife.

Pros of drinking:
- nice warm fuzzy feeling from the first drink and perhaps the taste

Cons of drinking:
- confidence that I can handle my drinking leads to binge drinking
- making a fool of myself
- hitting on or grouping woman
- putting myself in danger in a big city
- horrible, debilitating hangovers
- missing work
- loss of diginity
- damaging relationships
- damaged health

I am very new to recovery and probably shouldn't be saying so much yet. I hope all the 'good drinkers' everywhere can begin to recognize what this really means for oneself.

Zebra1275

Welcome!

FrothyJay

Not at all. Your voice is important to all of us, new and long-term. Do not self-edit.

MsCooterBrown

Pros and Cons list ..I did that and the cons by far outweighed any pros. But the list that I made (it is a very personal list..if you do it..just do it for you) on some of the stunts I have pulled while drunk were alarming. I had quite a list..been at the drinking game for years. Out of that..I realized that my drunken self is NOT something I ever want to be again. It was hard to write..and one of MANY reasons that keep me sober today. Looking back at that..there are many times I put myself in VERY dangerous situations. I have a family I love. I now have a life I love. Welcome CJ.

cj2011

Thank you. I feel great this morning. A byproduct of a good choice.

cj2011

That is a great point. Thanks for sharing that.

cj2011

And, that is something I am going to have to deal with. Not every person I know likes to drink, so I suppose I will be clocking higher hours with them.

sailorjohn

Welcome!!!

cj2011

Amen! Hard to believe I am still on this planet.

Thanks for the welcome.

cj2011

Day 2

artsoul

Congratulations on day 2 and welcome to our community!

Glad you're feeling positive today - if you're like me, it will continue to get better and better. I started to realize that there were a lot more negatives to drinking than I had originally thought. It's nice to have myself back and think clearly these days.

Keep reading and posting - it helps immensely!