Went to the Dr
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: The Sooner State
Posts: 1,725
Went to the Dr
I went to the Dr today on an unrelated issue. Anyhow I told him everything about my drinking and how I quit cold turkey 3 weeks ago. He said I am not an alcoholic. He said if I was I couldnt have just stopped. He does however want me to get into counceling. He said I need to figure out what void I am trying to fill. I was happy for the convo but Im confused. If Im not an alcoholic than what am I?
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: SoCal CA
Posts: 1,319
Just because he is a Dr. doesn't mean he really knows anything about alcoholism or substance abuse. Many Dr.'s I know tend to drink, and the common misconception is that if you are functioning in life, and not living on the streets you aren't an alcoholic. I know I thought this way for a long time. Until I realized that i was a functional alcoholic who obsessed like a crack addict and became physically dependant on it, I would probably still feel that way, like 75% of the population.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Toronto, ON
Posts: 1,591
Okla, your doctor is apparently operating with a very narrow definition of alcoholic. Alcoholism, to me, has to do with suffering and displacing the suffering through the USE of alcohol, and then getting stuck in the ongoing routine of using it (addicted), so that it's like food, water and air.
Some people might be hard on themselves and leap to conclusions about their dependence on alcohol, but I think usually when someone is thinking about quitting, that indicates they know something has been wrong. Same with people fortunate enough to actually quit.
I haven't read your other posts to know why you wanted to quit, but you must have had a good reason for quitting?
Some people might be hard on themselves and leap to conclusions about their dependence on alcohol, but I think usually when someone is thinking about quitting, that indicates they know something has been wrong. Same with people fortunate enough to actually quit.
I haven't read your other posts to know why you wanted to quit, but you must have had a good reason for quitting?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 507
Only you can determine if you're an alcoholic. My Russian psychiatrist joked that my bottle a day vodka habit was the norm in Russia. Does that make me something other than an alcoholic? I think not.
And you can "just stop". How else does one become sober?
And you can "just stop". How else does one become sober?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Toronto, ON
Posts: 1,591
I looked at Anna's reply and then I noticed I didn't chime in with an emphasis on the fact that I merely stopped on my own too. There are way more people than I wouuld have guessed who did it like this. In other words, there wasn't an intervention or people complaining about my drinking or anything prompting me to react; there was only my recognition that things weren't going the way I wanted and I knew how long I had been drinking and that I was locked in it. I put an end to "Am I really an alcoholic?" and just went with "I'm an alcoholic," and that was a really liberating decision, evidently, because I have stayed quit since that time. So if you want to stay that way, don't let a professional in medicine influence you otherwise indirectly or directly. I suggest looking at what led you to the conclusion, as I mentioned earlier.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,386
OK... don't start drinking again Okla 
I think anyone who's here on SR already has a very good idea of the damage drinking has caused them.
I 'just stopped' too...after 20 years of abusing myself with drink and drugs.
I know what I am - regardless of anyone else's opinion.
You know yourself what's right and what isn't.
D
I think anyone who's here on SR already has a very good idea of the damage drinking has caused them.
I 'just stopped' too...after 20 years of abusing myself with drink and drugs.
I know what I am - regardless of anyone else's opinion.
You know yourself what's right and what isn't.
D
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Lake Tahoe CA
Posts: 1,098
Okla - I imagine it would be really tempting to listen
to your Dr and proclaim yourself not an alcoholic.
IMHO that would be a slippery slope indeed.
At the end of the day it doesn't matter the label.
If your life is getting better because you have
stopped drinking, even if it hasn't all that much,
but you are now feeling better physically, then that is all that
matters.
Goodness knows I would have taken that information
and run with it right into a relapse as fast has I could.
Don't. Do. That!
to your Dr and proclaim yourself not an alcoholic.
IMHO that would be a slippery slope indeed.
At the end of the day it doesn't matter the label.
If your life is getting better because you have
stopped drinking, even if it hasn't all that much,
but you are now feeling better physically, then that is all that
matters.
Goodness knows I would have taken that information
and run with it right into a relapse as fast has I could.
Don't. Do. That!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,236
I have to giggle a bit because
after 20 yrs sobriety I think
my family still believes Im not
an alcoholic. That it is all in
my head. Or Im looking for
attention. :rotfxko
Im glad I have a program
of recovery to live by and
not theirs.
after 20 yrs sobriety I think
my family still believes Im not
an alcoholic. That it is all in
my head. Or Im looking for
attention. :rotfxko
Im glad I have a program
of recovery to live by and
not theirs.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: South Dakota, USA
Posts: 1,429
I think the most important diagnosis should come from within. I also told my doctor about my drinking, and then the next month he invited me to a Long Island Iced Tea party at his house. I guess he didn't take me too seriously. But I KNOW I am, and that is the most important thing.
Not waving, but drowning
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 423
I agree with everyone above. I was shocked that 3 doctors I saw in the last year all told me to just "cut down" on my drinking, even after I told them that it was daily, and escalating.
They said they didn't think I was an alcoholic, they didn't warn me about withdrawal. That was a nasty surprise, and could have been dangerous.
Especially for women, it doesn't take that much drinking to damage your liver and other organs. And really it isn't the dosage so much as what drinking is costing you, how hard it is to stop once you start, etc.
I too was able to just "stop" (for now). But I know that I am an alcoholic, and that I need support to stay sober, and that it isn't helpful when people tell me I'm exaggerating.
D
They said they didn't think I was an alcoholic, they didn't warn me about withdrawal. That was a nasty surprise, and could have been dangerous.
Especially for women, it doesn't take that much drinking to damage your liver and other organs. And really it isn't the dosage so much as what drinking is costing you, how hard it is to stop once you start, etc.
I too was able to just "stop" (for now). But I know that I am an alcoholic, and that I need support to stay sober, and that it isn't helpful when people tell me I'm exaggerating.
D
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Indianapolis, IN
Posts: 889
I don't think my Dr. has a clue about alcoholism. Also, I went to a counsler a few years ago and she had no clue either. This isn't me being a hillbilly and saying "Dem Dr's don't no crap" lol... I really mean that my Dr. really doesn't know much about it.
The only people that truly get my alcoholism are alcoholics (thank god they can't write prescriptions). I posted a link with a alcoholism test. I can repost if you'd like. Bottom line, do you obsess about when you can drink or when you can't drink? Do you "line up your buzz"? Meaning, do you ever say, I just have to get through x, y, and z then everything will be OK because I can drink later. When you drink, do you often drink much more than you plan on? And finally, do you ever feel regret, shame, or remorsfulness after drinking?
That is the RW alcohol test that I just made up in my mind. If you know where I'm coming from on these questions, then chances are --- you are alcoholic.
Best of luck!
The only people that truly get my alcoholism are alcoholics (thank god they can't write prescriptions). I posted a link with a alcoholism test. I can repost if you'd like. Bottom line, do you obsess about when you can drink or when you can't drink? Do you "line up your buzz"? Meaning, do you ever say, I just have to get through x, y, and z then everything will be OK because I can drink later. When you drink, do you often drink much more than you plan on? And finally, do you ever feel regret, shame, or remorsfulness after drinking?
That is the RW alcohol test that I just made up in my mind. If you know where I'm coming from on these questions, then chances are --- you are alcoholic.
Best of luck!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Indianapolis, IN
Posts: 889
One more thing... this girl knew she was an alcoholic...
Hi all. My name is Brooks. I have drank consistently for the last 10 years. I had gastric bypass last March. I thought after the surgery I wouldnt be able to tolerate alcohol. WRONG! Not only do I toerate it I drink way more than I ever have before. I dont know where to start in order to stop. Today is the first time I have admitted I have a problem. Thank you in advance.
Our disease is cunning, baffling, powerful. It will trick us any way it can. "I don't know where to start in order to stop"... you're words at a different time in history. A non alcoholic would never, and I mean never make such a statement.
Hope this helps. I know re-reading some of my old posts really helps me.
Hi all. My name is Brooks. I have drank consistently for the last 10 years. I had gastric bypass last March. I thought after the surgery I wouldnt be able to tolerate alcohol. WRONG! Not only do I toerate it I drink way more than I ever have before. I dont know where to start in order to stop. Today is the first time I have admitted I have a problem. Thank you in advance.
Our disease is cunning, baffling, powerful. It will trick us any way it can. "I don't know where to start in order to stop"... you're words at a different time in history. A non alcoholic would never, and I mean never make such a statement.
Hope this helps. I know re-reading some of my old posts really helps me.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: San Diego
Posts: 4,451
Not sure I follow the doc's logic. Everybody who's gone through recovery has, by definition, just stopped. Obviously the approach, level of support, extent of issues vary... but still, that seems like a pat answer from someone who's not well versed in addiction. Still, it kind of amazes me he would cavalierly say something so potentially dangerous.
My advice? Take Reggie's advice....
My advice? Take Reggie's advice....
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: San Diego
Posts: 4,451
Another thought: How did that make you feel?
I know part of me—that old addict part—would be elated. My heart would skip a beat. Then it would skip another beat, because I'd also be scared. That's the part of me that knows I'm an alcoholic....
I know part of me—that old addict part—would be elated. My heart would skip a beat. Then it would skip another beat, because I'd also be scared. That's the part of me that knows I'm an alcoholic....
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 581
I do agree that it's ultimately your call as to whether or not you are an alcoholic.
But according to the AA textbook, if you can quit based on willpower you are not an alcoholic. You don't have to agree with it, but that's essentially what it says. We are powerless and hopeless.
Now, I don't believe after 3 weeks you've proven much of anything. I stopped drinking for a decade and went back to it.
You develop your own experience, and draw your own conclusions. I'll re-state the criteria my sponsor uses:
- when you put it in you, does it say "give me more?"
- when you swear it off, do you drink again anyway?
-
But according to the AA textbook, if you can quit based on willpower you are not an alcoholic. You don't have to agree with it, but that's essentially what it says. We are powerless and hopeless.
Now, I don't believe after 3 weeks you've proven much of anything. I stopped drinking for a decade and went back to it.
You develop your own experience, and draw your own conclusions. I'll re-state the criteria my sponsor uses:
- when you put it in you, does it say "give me more?"
- when you swear it off, do you drink again anyway?
-
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: SoCal CA
Posts: 1,319
Originally Posted by FrothyJay 
I do agree that it's ultimately your call as to whether or not you are an alcoholic.
But according to the AA textbook, if you can quit based on willpower you are not an alcoholic. You don't have to agree with it, but that's essentially what it says. We are powerless and hopeless.
Now, I don't believe after 3 weeks you've proven much of anything. I stopped drinking for a decade and went back to it.
You develop your own experience, and draw your own conclusions. I'll re-state the criteria my sponsor uses:
- when you put it in you, does it say "give me more?"
- when you swear it off, do you drink again anyway?
-
But according to the AA textbook, if you can quit based on willpower you are not an alcoholic. You don't have to agree with it, but that's essentially what it says. We are powerless and hopeless.
Now, I don't believe after 3 weeks you've proven much of anything. I stopped drinking for a decade and went back to it.
You develop your own experience, and draw your own conclusions. I'll re-state the criteria my sponsor uses:
- when you put it in you, does it say "give me more?"
- when you swear it off, do you drink again anyway?
-
If I am off base let me know, because I consider that in my sobriety it was willpower ultimately, along with the support here at SR and my own wellness program that I put together that helped me quit, and allows me to be happy daily and not obsess about the booze and it keeps me sober.
What am I missing?
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 3,452
If people being able to stop drinking ruled out alcoholism...would we all not be alcoholics because we stopped drinking?
Alcoholics are able to stop drinking.
Hmnn...stumped on this one.
I think the doctor is implying that because you were able to "just stop" that means you are not alcoholic, in that a real alcoholic would not be able to stop.
Again, that would make all that are able to stop, non alcoholic, and we know this is not true.
Many people are able to stop...but can we "stay stopped".
What makes me an alcoholic is the effect alcohol has on me. Not whether I can stop or not.
Can I stay away from it once I have stopped, or do I go back to drinking alcohol after I have sworn off of it?
Read the Doctor's Opinion in the book Alcoholics Anonymous.
http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/en_doctoropinion.cfm
Read what it means to be an alcoholic.
It's not about whether we can just stop or not as the definition.
Physical Allergy. Mental Obsession.
Check it out.
I would share this link with the doctor, and have them read "The Doctor's Opinion! ...see what the doctor thinks about it?
Also...someone suggested the best doctor to see is an "addictionologist"...that most medical doctors only have very minimal experience and knowledge with alcoholism.
Alcoholics are able to stop drinking.
Hmnn...stumped on this one.
I think the doctor is implying that because you were able to "just stop" that means you are not alcoholic, in that a real alcoholic would not be able to stop.
Again, that would make all that are able to stop, non alcoholic, and we know this is not true.
Many people are able to stop...but can we "stay stopped".
What makes me an alcoholic is the effect alcohol has on me. Not whether I can stop or not.
Can I stay away from it once I have stopped, or do I go back to drinking alcohol after I have sworn off of it?
Read the Doctor's Opinion in the book Alcoholics Anonymous.
http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/en_doctoropinion.cfm
Read what it means to be an alcoholic.
It's not about whether we can just stop or not as the definition.
Physical Allergy. Mental Obsession.
Check it out.
I would share this link with the doctor, and have them read "The Doctor's Opinion! ...see what the doctor thinks about it?
Also...someone suggested the best doctor to see is an "addictionologist"...that most medical doctors only have very minimal experience and knowledge with alcoholism.
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