Big Mistake, Should Have Sent His Mail
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Brick, NJ
Posts: 52
Big Mistake, Should Have Sent His Mail
After over 2 weeks of being gone, my AH has been contacting me about his mail at the house. I should have just sent it to his job. Yesterday, I agreed to meet him in the convenience store parking lot down the street. He got in the passenger seat. I should have locked the doors and cracked the window open a little. Long story short, let the blubbering begin... I amazed myself, I remained calm. I was unemotional and matter of fact. He said the usual, he's a mess without me, can't function, came in dead last in sales for the month at work, bosses called him into the office to ask what's going on with him. So now I even get blamed for his poor work performance? Gee, thanks. Can't eat, sleep and is vomiting blood and getting bloody noses all the time. I told him to visit a Dr. I'm not a Dr. and can't help him with that. He's says it's from the stress of him not being home. Um, hello? Got mad every time I used the word "alcoholic". "Stop calling me that, I'm not an alcoholic!" I changed the term. to "people who have a drinking problem" and he didn't seem to notice. My God. He actually had the gall to tell me that he just wants to be "normal". By that , he said he wants to be able to come home after work and only drink 2 beers to "relax". "every man does that". Made no mention of a recovery plan, AA nothing. Wants me to invite him back and he'll moderate his drinking. He "promises". Holy cow! Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt! How many times do you have to try to "moderate" your drinking before you figure out it doesn't work? It never does!! I spent 45 minutes in my car picturing Daffy Duck in my passenger seat. Quackity Quack Quack!!! I could barely look at him. I came home, cooked a big dinner for me and the kids, and plopped my butt on the couch for some comedic relief (American Idol) I know, I know not everyone's cup of tea. It didn't destroy my night like I thought it would. Guess thats good. Feeling good today, except for one sad thing which is totally OT. I'm a huge Yankees fan and my favorite, adorable player, Andy Pettitte, just had a press conference announcing his retirement. I'm sad about that, bleak baseball season for me this year!Thanks for listening guys.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: boston ma
Posts: 70
So happy for you. You sound like you have your own head straight. I am a little jealous. Part of me still desperately wants to believe the quacking and I let it hold me back from moving forward without him. I needed to hear your post today. Sort of inspiration for me. Thanks.
To thine own self be true.
Join Date: May 2009
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 5,924
So glad you did not fall for it Corkel.
Here's the link to the USPS Change of Address Form.
https://moversguide.usps.com/icoa/ic...execution=e1s1
Here's the link to the USPS Change of Address Form.
https://moversguide.usps.com/icoa/ic...execution=e1s1
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Waterford MI
Posts: 4,202
Long story short, let the blubbering begin... I amazed myself, I remained calm. I was unemotional and matter of fact. He said the usual, he's a mess without me, can't function, came in dead last in sales for the month at work, bosses called him into the office to ask what's going on with him. So now I even get blamed for his poor work performance?
And every problem he has is your fault.
good god.
Beth
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Alaska
Posts: 2,913
Corkel, you are amazing! 
XAH actually forwarded some of his mail to my apartment after I left him and moved out. WTF? "I wanted to be sure I got it, so I know you'd give it to me." I am not your mailbox, buddy. Line through and "Not At This Address - Return to Sender" written on it when he failed to change it and I didn't know where he was crashing.
XAH actually forwarded some of his mail to my apartment after I left him and moved out. WTF? "I wanted to be sure I got it, so I know you'd give it to me." I am not your mailbox, buddy. Line through and "Not At This Address - Return to Sender" written on it when he failed to change it and I didn't know where he was crashing.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,059
isn't it great to just go home after something stressful and trying, come in, close the door and AH isn't there!
isn't it great to go home, cook what YOU want to eat, and settle in for a quack free night, watching what YOU want.
you did great, corkel. i agree with the advice above to determine a plan so that you don't have to deal with his mail anymore.
isn't it great to go home, cook what YOU want to eat, and settle in for a quack free night, watching what YOU want.
you did great, corkel. i agree with the advice above to determine a plan so that you don't have to deal with his mail anymore.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Brick, NJ
Posts: 52
Thanks all for your sweet words! I did tell him that he has to fill out a change of address card at the post office. I'm sure he won't, will probably feel too "permanent" for him. Looking forward to going to the movies with my daughter today, hope everyone has a great weekend!
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