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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 11
New to the forum
Hi,
I found this forum searching for inspirational stories to send to my son in prison. He is finishing up a 3 1/2 year sentence for felony DUI/drug charges. He has 8 months & 6 days left. When he gets out he will face 3 1/2 more years of probation with the first 6 months intense.
This is his 5th time in prison and he is 32 years old. Every time he's went to prison it's been for alcohol until this time which included drug charges. He has used alcohol and drugs since a teenager. His drug of choice is meth.
Since being incarcerated this time he has 1. admitted he is an alcoholic / drug addict, 2. become involved in both AA & NA, 3. maintained sobriety (both physically & mentally, 4. has even quit smoking., 5. found out he has Hep C., 6. fallen in love with his daughter whom we've had since she was 4 months old and she is now 4 years old.
We have seen a big change in him this time. Yes, we've seen the whole prison redemption change before but he's different this time. He seems more at peace, humble, sober and unselfish.
We will allow him to come home to live for one last time. If he remains sober, works consistently, pulls his weight (financially, physically) and lives his life under the authority of the law then he may stay for as long as he needs to get his life together. However if he slips on any of those conditions he will have to leave. And once he leaves he will not be allowed to come back again.
Of course now that we are under a year before he comes home I am starting to get nervous. I worry about him having a relapse. He's asked up to come up with a plan for intervention in case he does relapse. Is that a sign he expects it, a sign of lack of faith or a smart move on his part showing that although he may relapse he does desire to remain in recovery? I don't know.
I am not nor have I ever had an addictive personality so I don't understand all of this.
He said in his last letter that "I am very grateful for the way things are lining up for me for a good opportunity for my release so far. I have a nice home to go to with my family and my daughter, a job, a ride to work, knowlege of my addiction and a very good perspective on life."
I feel that for the next 8 months I need some guidance, support, encouragement and truthfulness about addiction. Please don't suggest Al-anon meetings for me. I live in a very, very small town and the only meeting available did not work out. In some cases the anonymity of the internet is truly better.
Forgive my long introduction and I look forward to learning and growing here.
Triplejs
I found this forum searching for inspirational stories to send to my son in prison. He is finishing up a 3 1/2 year sentence for felony DUI/drug charges. He has 8 months & 6 days left. When he gets out he will face 3 1/2 more years of probation with the first 6 months intense.
This is his 5th time in prison and he is 32 years old. Every time he's went to prison it's been for alcohol until this time which included drug charges. He has used alcohol and drugs since a teenager. His drug of choice is meth.
Since being incarcerated this time he has 1. admitted he is an alcoholic / drug addict, 2. become involved in both AA & NA, 3. maintained sobriety (both physically & mentally, 4. has even quit smoking., 5. found out he has Hep C., 6. fallen in love with his daughter whom we've had since she was 4 months old and she is now 4 years old.
We have seen a big change in him this time. Yes, we've seen the whole prison redemption change before but he's different this time. He seems more at peace, humble, sober and unselfish.
We will allow him to come home to live for one last time. If he remains sober, works consistently, pulls his weight (financially, physically) and lives his life under the authority of the law then he may stay for as long as he needs to get his life together. However if he slips on any of those conditions he will have to leave. And once he leaves he will not be allowed to come back again.
Of course now that we are under a year before he comes home I am starting to get nervous. I worry about him having a relapse. He's asked up to come up with a plan for intervention in case he does relapse. Is that a sign he expects it, a sign of lack of faith or a smart move on his part showing that although he may relapse he does desire to remain in recovery? I don't know.
I am not nor have I ever had an addictive personality so I don't understand all of this.
He said in his last letter that "I am very grateful for the way things are lining up for me for a good opportunity for my release so far. I have a nice home to go to with my family and my daughter, a job, a ride to work, knowlege of my addiction and a very good perspective on life."
I feel that for the next 8 months I need some guidance, support, encouragement and truthfulness about addiction. Please don't suggest Al-anon meetings for me. I live in a very, very small town and the only meeting available did not work out. In some cases the anonymity of the internet is truly better.
Forgive my long introduction and I look forward to learning and growing here.
Triplejs
Groovy Dancer
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: The States
Posts: 4,751
Welcome to SR. There is a lot of information here. You may want to check out the Friends and Forum section of SR - Links below. Good luck.
Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Friends and Family of Substance Abusers - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Friends and Family of Substance Abusers - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Life the gift of recovery!
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Home is where the heart is
Posts: 7,061
A great section of these forums for inspirational stories is here: Stories of Recovery - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
They are the stories of recovery from people that have been here at SR.
Welcome to SR. I wish both you and your son the best recovery has to offer.
They are the stories of recovery from people that have been here at SR.
Welcome to SR. I wish both you and your son the best recovery has to offer.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
Welcome to SR!!!
I'm both a recovering codependent (codie) and recovering addict (RA), and fwiw, though I did do meetings in the past, SR has been my lifeline for both my recoveries. I do, however, still get a lot from what I learned in meetings, and what people here, who do meetings, talk about.
I wanted recovery more than anything in my life, on both accounts. I pray things work out for you and your son, and I'm glad you're here. There's a ton of support here.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
I'm both a recovering codependent (codie) and recovering addict (RA), and fwiw, though I did do meetings in the past, SR has been my lifeline for both my recoveries. I do, however, still get a lot from what I learned in meetings, and what people here, who do meetings, talk about.
I wanted recovery more than anything in my life, on both accounts. I pray things work out for you and your son, and I'm glad you're here. There's a ton of support here.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
How great! I know quite a few people who got sober in prison (and stayed that way). I always contribute to our group's LIPS (Literature In Prison) can, and I hope to be doing some service work in correctional institutions soon.
So many people do insane, hurtful things when they are in the grip of this disease. It's great that the prisons cooperate with us to bring the message in so these people don't have to return to prison as soon as they get out.
Best wishes to your son for a happy future!
So many people do insane, hurtful things when they are in the grip of this disease. It's great that the prisons cooperate with us to bring the message in so these people don't have to return to prison as soon as they get out.
Best wishes to your son for a happy future!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 279
Welcome! Good luck to you.
I have a friend who has been in prison several times for alcohol related issues. He's been through the court ordered rehab several times, and I've seen him relapse several times, so I can somewhat understand your apprehension with your son coming home. The best advice I can give is to remain optimistic, and to stick to your conditions.
I have a friend who has been in prison several times for alcohol related issues. He's been through the court ordered rehab several times, and I've seen him relapse several times, so I can somewhat understand your apprehension with your son coming home. The best advice I can give is to remain optimistic, and to stick to your conditions.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome, triplejs - I'm sorry to hear about your son, but glad that he's not drinking or using and that he seems to be more interested in his recovery this time. As they say in AA "it takes what it takes." Denial is such a huge part of any kind of addiction - it's really good that he's admitted his problem.
I can only imagine (as a mother) what you must have gone through and the worry you have. If Al-Anon doesn't work for you, have you ever considered counseling? I'm sure you'll find lots of understanding and support here, too. Prayers for your family......
I can only imagine (as a mother) what you must have gone through and the worry you have. If Al-Anon doesn't work for you, have you ever considered counseling? I'm sure you'll find lots of understanding and support here, too. Prayers for your family......
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,759
I would say your plan for his living with you is very good, with his understanding that he may not slip even once. He has a job lined up already for when he gets out? If so, that's also very good. Nothing like working a job and getting a salary and being able to meet his obligations for making a person feel worthy.
I'd even go so far as to draw up a written contract for his behavior, obligations, both financial and otherwise, and so on, to be signed and notorized so that you both have a copy just in case it's needed.
All the best to you and your son.
I'd even go so far as to draw up a written contract for his behavior, obligations, both financial and otherwise, and so on, to be signed and notorized so that you both have a copy just in case it's needed.
All the best to you and your son.
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