Confused...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 2
Confused...
Hi everyone. I'll make my story as short as possible.
I never drank even a sip of alcohol until I was 22 and broke up with my longterm boyfriend. Then I went on a binge and even became slightly promiscuous, but it didn't last long and there were no repercussions of my actions. I continued drinking with friends every now and then (a few times a month maximum). I never drink just one or two drinks, I think of it as wasted calories... if I'm going to drink, I'm going to make sure I get drunk so it will be worth it.
Well, I never thought I had a problem until tonight. A very good friend of mine (whom I dated in the past) mentioned to another friend of ours that he gets mad when I drink and gets concerned about me. I don't know the exact details, but I had a flashback at this moment--this is not the first relationship that has failed partially due to my drinking habits. I've dated other guys in the past that said they did not like when I drank. I don't know exactly why, I tend to be a fun and social drunk, but apparently I do things when I'm drunk that either annoy or worry them? I don't know... I haven't asked for details... but I'm assuming since this is not the first time I've heard this, then there might be a problem here.
Alcoholism runs in my family. My Grandpa, uncles, and brother are all alcoholics, only one has admitted to his problem and sought help and is recovering (my brother).
Should I be concerned? Do I have a problem? Should I nip it in the bud now before it could get worse? I'm sorry this is so long, I just have no idea what to do or where to turn.
Thank you all so much for reading.
I never drank even a sip of alcohol until I was 22 and broke up with my longterm boyfriend. Then I went on a binge and even became slightly promiscuous, but it didn't last long and there were no repercussions of my actions. I continued drinking with friends every now and then (a few times a month maximum). I never drink just one or two drinks, I think of it as wasted calories... if I'm going to drink, I'm going to make sure I get drunk so it will be worth it.
Well, I never thought I had a problem until tonight. A very good friend of mine (whom I dated in the past) mentioned to another friend of ours that he gets mad when I drink and gets concerned about me. I don't know the exact details, but I had a flashback at this moment--this is not the first relationship that has failed partially due to my drinking habits. I've dated other guys in the past that said they did not like when I drank. I don't know exactly why, I tend to be a fun and social drunk, but apparently I do things when I'm drunk that either annoy or worry them? I don't know... I haven't asked for details... but I'm assuming since this is not the first time I've heard this, then there might be a problem here.
Alcoholism runs in my family. My Grandpa, uncles, and brother are all alcoholics, only one has admitted to his problem and sought help and is recovering (my brother).
Should I be concerned? Do I have a problem? Should I nip it in the bud now before it could get worse? I'm sorry this is so long, I just have no idea what to do or where to turn.
Thank you all so much for reading.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Great Outdoors
Posts: 1,992
I don't know... I haven't asked for details... but I'm assuming since this is not the first time I've heard this, then there might be a problem here.
I would venture a bet that since you are wondering if it is a problem..it may be a problem..Only you would know the answer to that..but I hope you stay with us. Give sobriety a go! You will find yourself more at peace. And..once you are sober..it will be the real you. Not your addiction alter ego. Hang in there!
I would venture a bet that since you are wondering if it is a problem..it may be a problem..Only you would know the answer to that..but I hope you stay with us. Give sobriety a go! You will find yourself more at peace. And..once you are sober..it will be the real you. Not your addiction alter ego. Hang in there!
Dismember
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: The Mitten, USA
Posts: 1,641
Hey AutumnLeaves,
I think by your own admission there is a problem. You're finding negative consequences with the people in your life because of your drinking. Pretty much everyone who drinks more than a little has a few bad stories of a night gone bad, but when it turns into a pattern that's when people ought to consider an alternative.
We try our best to be helpful here but your course of action is something that you'll have to figure out by yourself eventually. One thing that I notice gets a lot of people who come here is believing you have to know that you're an alcoholic in order to decide what to do. I wouldn't stress about labeling your drinking. Just ask yourself what the consequences would be if you did quit. Would having a better chance at relationships and certainty that you wouldn't inherit the family alcoholism be better than what alcohol is giving you?
We're here to help. The choice will be yours but you don't have to make it alone.
I think by your own admission there is a problem. You're finding negative consequences with the people in your life because of your drinking. Pretty much everyone who drinks more than a little has a few bad stories of a night gone bad, but when it turns into a pattern that's when people ought to consider an alternative.
We try our best to be helpful here but your course of action is something that you'll have to figure out by yourself eventually. One thing that I notice gets a lot of people who come here is believing you have to know that you're an alcoholic in order to decide what to do. I wouldn't stress about labeling your drinking. Just ask yourself what the consequences would be if you did quit. Would having a better chance at relationships and certainty that you wouldn't inherit the family alcoholism be better than what alcohol is giving you?
We're here to help. The choice will be yours but you don't have to make it alone.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 5,285
Hi autumn! Welcome to SR!
A good place to start is take a break from alcohol for 6 months and see how it goes. If that is too hard you might need to put some serious effort into stopping....if its easy then you may be okay....for now. The sad thing is you have a stronger likelihood of developing a problem then others (with your family history) so even if you aren't there yet you might want to nip this problem in the bud.
A good place to start is take a break from alcohol for 6 months and see how it goes. If that is too hard you might need to put some serious effort into stopping....if its easy then you may be okay....for now. The sad thing is you have a stronger likelihood of developing a problem then others (with your family history) so even if you aren't there yet you might want to nip this problem in the bud.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Mi
Posts: 18
Glad to have you here!!
If your questioning if you have an alcohol problem, than more than likely you do. But it is different in everybody's cases. You, only, can ask if you seek, crave, etc. alcohol on a regular basis. But, if people around you are concerned about your alcohol intake, it may be time to look into AA or similar outlets. Once outsiders notice it, then it has become a big problem. For me, no one noticed except myself. Maybe you can elaborate about your drinking history for other forum posters to help with. This forum will help you out if you want the help.
Sorry if I couldn't be more help,
DK
If your questioning if you have an alcohol problem, than more than likely you do. But it is different in everybody's cases. You, only, can ask if you seek, crave, etc. alcohol on a regular basis. But, if people around you are concerned about your alcohol intake, it may be time to look into AA or similar outlets. Once outsiders notice it, then it has become a big problem. For me, no one noticed except myself. Maybe you can elaborate about your drinking history for other forum posters to help with. This forum will help you out if you want the help.
Sorry if I couldn't be more help,
DK
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,348
Hi Autumn
I agree with the prevailing opinion here - if you find you drink to get wasted, you have a family history of alcoholism, and drinking is causing problems for you and your relationships, it's probably time for you to consider alcohol's place in your life.
Having blackouts is a particularly dangerous thing to have happen, quite apart from the embarrassment factor, in that you never quite know where you'll find yourself or what you might do.
Seeing your Dr is often a good first step - especially if you've been drinking heavily or regularly for a long time - detox can sometimes be rough for some of us.
You'll find a lot of help and support here - welcome!
D
I agree with the prevailing opinion here - if you find you drink to get wasted, you have a family history of alcoholism, and drinking is causing problems for you and your relationships, it's probably time for you to consider alcohol's place in your life.
Having blackouts is a particularly dangerous thing to have happen, quite apart from the embarrassment factor, in that you never quite know where you'll find yourself or what you might do.
Seeing your Dr is often a good first step - especially if you've been drinking heavily or regularly for a long time - detox can sometimes be rough for some of us.
You'll find a lot of help and support here - welcome!
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 2
Thank you all very much for your input. I think you're all right; since I'm questioning if I have a problem--I probably do. And before it gets worse I should take the initiative to fix it now.
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