bettterlife4me

Hello - I have posted only a few time here, although I have read many inspiring posts and am very glad this site exits.

So here is my story - I live alone and have for the last 6 years since my divorce. I left my marriage of 20 years in 2004. The ex and I both drank a lot throughout our marriage, but he drank much more than I, and that was the catalyst for me leaving, but don't get me wrong, I drank my fair share.

Two months after leaving my sexless, empty marriage, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Other than drinking too much I was quite healthy. Have exercised regularly all my life and ate healthy.

I was so happy to be out on my own and out of my "prison" of a marriage. I could not believe this new challenge that had been placed before me. Are you kidding me? I finally got up the courage to leave my marriage and now you're telling me I have invasive breast cancer?

I endured chemotherapy and radiation freakishly well. I am very grateful I am now 6 years out and have an excellent prognosis.

So here comes the bad part. I drank all through chemo. I continue to drink today. I drink too much. I come home from work and the first thing I want is a drink. Maybe it's habit? Don't know but I do feel as though it's starting to steal my life and I hate that. I have two sisters and a brother who also drink too much.

I do want to stop - I don't want to beat cancer only to succumb to alcohol.

Sorry for the ramble....it was just in me and had to come out..

I am grateful for this site and plan to visit often.

Thanks

stanleyhouse

Hello
I am so glad you are here. You want a better life! That's the best motivation to live a sober because your life will be better when you are not controlled by alcohol. It sounds like you have been around people who drink for too many years. You are going to like clear-headed people.
SH

MsCooterBrown

Hi BL4M! Glad you posted...I think you will find alot of support, this is a great place to be. I too was in a drunken marriage. Then divorced..then stepped deep back into the relationship! I felt so hurt that I wanted to stop drinking and he was on a drunkfest from hell! He chose drinking over me. After finally leaving all that behind (25 yrs later)..I had a helluva roll going. I wanted so badly to get sober but my spirit was killed. Hung out with wild friends. Did some really stupid sh!t. I hung in like a trooper..always the first one to start the shots..the last one standing. Finally I had had it. A year after we split I tossed in the towel. I quit. I think you have to really get to that point. Get it in your head that alcohol is no longer an option no matter what. I think if you faced breast cancer and beat it..you have some fight in you! I found SR and I am building a library of books on alcoholism and the horrible health issues that ensue. I am currently reading Under The Influence. I also lost a few really close friends to alcohol related deaths. Finally just got to the point where enough is enough. I hope you stay with us. I am sure others will offer more support as well. Hang in there.

bettterlife4me

Thanks so much for your replies.

Ms CooterBrown - I very much relate to your response. I think we may have attended some of the same parties. I have always been the party girl which works okay to a point. I am way past that point.

Dee74

Hey bettterlife4me - welcome back

Congratulations on beating cancer.

I think the key to success with this problem is knowing that we have to make changes in our lives, and not being afraid to make them.

Have you got a plan - something to add to what you did last time?

D

bettterlife4me

Thanks, Dee. For now, my plan is to hang out on SR quite a bit. There is a lot of support and inspiration here. :ghug3

Instead of my usual Friday habit of either going to happy hour with friends from work or, going home and having a 'drink' (it's never one drink of course) I will log on to SR and drink in the positive energy here.