librarygoddess

Hi,
This is my first time doing this. My husband has suffered a very bad relapse that has lasted 6 months. Nothing has been working--meetings, therapy, out-patient treatment. It has been pretty bad. On the advice of his psychiatrist he has started taking antabuse. It has been 8 days and he has been clean. He is committed and determined to stay clean. I know this is not the end all answer but for now it is working. Anybody have any thoughts?

Freedom1990

Hi librarygoddess, and welcome to SR!

My thoughts are what kind of support are you getting for yourself as far as the effects that his alcoholism has had on you?

Alanon is a wonderful place to find face-to-face support among those who understand. It has certainly been a lifesaver for me, and although we no longer have Alanon meetings in my small town, I still practice the principles of Alanon in my daily life.

I'd like to recommend the book "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie. It's an excellent starter book.

There are also 3 C's that are important to remember:
You didn't cause his alcoholism.
You can't control his alcoholism.
You can't cure his alcoholism.

Educate yourself further on alcoholism. There are a lot of good 'sticky' topics posted at the top of this forum to read if you are interested.

I was married to an alcoholic/addict, I have a 32-year-old daughter who's active in addictions, and I am also in long-term recovery from my own alcoholism/addictions.

Please take good care of yourself. I hope you continue to post, and know that you are among friends, okay?

RollTide

What I learned is that there was absolutely nothing I could do to prevent my husband's drinking. We were married for 6 years and it was the best of times/ it was the worst of times. The drinking always came back and always worse than ever. It never, ever ended. My life became insane. We separated this time last year and were divorced in Jan. This website saved my life and I later found Alanon and it has also been very helpful. He'll get sober when he decides to get sober and not a day sooner. My XAH has recently drank so much that I think he's scared himself. Maybe it will be his bottom...who knows. Mine was a year ago and I've been taking care of me ever since.

Stay around...we're glad you're here.

Babyblue

My thoughts are, focus on you and how well you have coped. No one knows what the future holds but just keep your fingers crossed. It is all you can do. Like any illness a loved one suffers from, we really have no control over the outcome. Just take care of yourself