steve1840

up and down, then back up.
i might appear so bad because i just ruminate and write about it. deep down inside though i know everything. i've known for a long time.

i see that this is about me because of my inability to make the move i must make. but i also believe it all happens in its time. i inch closer to it. and i will get there.

and seriously, i will get there

Live

I was thinking about you yesterday and there is a technique for helping to manage this.
You set aside a certain amount of time..for you, maybe an hour...say from 3-4pm is your allotted time.
That is your worry time.
If it pops up at other times, you say to yourself..nope,not now, I have my hour scheduled and I will do it full out in that time only.

steve1840

thanks live, good idea!

the thing too is i am not always as bad as i come off. here is what is bizarre. so deep down i have known for a long time, but ignored everything. i have realized i need to work on myself and try to meet some nice people. so today i started talking to a nice woman i wanted to talk to before, never thought i'd see her again. struck up a nice conversation, turns out she's into old buildings too. while we're talking, my phone rings, i knew the number- it was her. twice. i didn't even flinch. weird timing.

Live

oh, that is AWESOME, Steve.
And believe me I was way worse than you for far, far longer.

so, you have this new woman's number?

you know the old one is yanking your chain rather expertly. blah.

steve1840

she happily gave me her number, perhaps an afternoon coffee someday.

i guess i know the old one is yanking my chain. i am naive that people can be like that. i never felt fully comfortable, at least not for long. i assumed some sort of caretaker role with her. in honesty, i have felt better with less contact.

Lunaaa

Steve thats just great. I know you WILL get there. Stay strong.
Hugs and prayers.

Live

Steve, some dating advice...call her one week from today. Mark it on your calendar.
To heck with someday....you have needed some positive distractions! You don't have to jump in with both feet and start a relationship...but there are certain protocols!

You have talked about getting out an getting some photographs for a while but was too upset to go and do it..

take advantage of this good turn!
seize the day!

Babyblue

And remember Steve, if you are down and gloomy, it won't attract the chicks. Thats why you gotta shake her from your system so that you will be at a good place and attract people to you.