mayson28

I had been feeling really good but the cravings have set in... or are they really old habits die hard? whatever it's bothersome. My hubby told me that he will be out tonight changing the tires and doing Xmas lights, first thought in my head is how much I used to like when he'd be out of the house so I wouldn't have to sneak a drink, I could just go about freely, which then brought on a flood of emotions... No drinking ever again. I know there is no answer to this but when do all these thoughts go away? I know they are never fully gone but I also can't wait until I can stop obsessing about it all...

pascal

I can so relate to your story. Some friends here on SR recommended a book Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp. I read it during my initial times of temptation. It really helped me. It is also a great read - if you are like me, you will see yourself on most every page. Hang in there!

stellaloella

I feel your pain. I used to look forward to my husband being gone so I could drink. Now he's gone all the time due to my drinking and the misery of that knowledge makes me scared to drink. Terrified, in fact. My situation has had a strong effect of aversion therapy. Yestderday I found the inevitable hidden bottles as I prepare to move, and I felt physically ill. Make some nice hot tea and enjoy your day.

Dee74

The more we deal with these kinds of situations sober, the better we get at it I think, Mayson.

All you guys are doing great

D

Anna

"Drinking: A Love Story" - I can't say enough good things about that book.

Caroline Knapp expresses so beautifully the love affair that she had with alcohol and the loss that she felt when she stopped drinking.

coop1

Hang in there Mayson, only on day 12 here but each day gets a little easier.

Stevie1

Carolyn Knapp's book was great, I read it many years ago and wanted to highlight something on almost every page. (Most sadly, she has since passed away.)

mayson, stay strong. I can so relate to loving it when my (now ex) husband would be out of the house so I could get hammered without being sneaky about it...and then feeling really guilty for that. I'm just at the beginning of another quit...but I do remember the cravings subsiding when I quit before. It felt really amazing not to be drunk every day, once I got over the strangeness of being sober at night!

least

I'd say it was between four to six months sober when I realized the cravings were few and far between, and easily dismissed. The desire to drink was gone, finally, and I wasn't thinking about it all the time.

Give yourself time to grow into your new sober life. And treat yourself well: good food, lots of fluids, vitamins, and exercise. Be good to yourself and your body/mind will soon be feeling a lot better.

mayson28

Thank you all for your responses. Last night was brutal. Betweeen 5-7pm. My neighbour had beer chilling on the deck and I was bitter I can't be normal and have a few. Then everything seemed chaotic for a bit at home and I was emotional (left and cried in the bathroom once) and the thought of feeling like I was everynight because I no longer can/won't turn to vodka was overwhelming to say the least. I kept thinking how easily I could make it all go away by having a drink... But I didn't. And then 7pm hit and it's like my over-active brain turned off and I was at peace again. Very calm. Even went to bed at 10 and fell asleep quickly and slept all night.
I couldn't log in from home because I forget my password, at work, I am always logged in. I could've really used you guys!

Anna

Good for you in getting through this!

mayson28

Thank you. I am thanking my stubborness... For once it is coming in handy! And I could have turned to the meds the doc gave but I was told they are highly addictive... Just what I DON'T need.
Anna, I am ordering the book today, thanks.