Closure?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 15
Closure?
I have recently gone no contact with my ex addict boyfriend. I sent him a text message telling him that I was done and why I was done; because he was getting high that night. Anyways he tried to make up lies to get me to not leave, and I didn't respond. This was on friday night. On monday of this week, he called and left a voicemail saying he was getting help and he just wanted to let me know because he knows that I still care.
He is right. I do care about his well being. But I don't trust him and I just can't do that anymore.
I feel like I need closure since it has come to an end. Would it help or just make it worse? What did you do?
He is right. I do care about his well being. But I don't trust him and I just can't do that anymore.
I feel like I need closure since it has come to an end. Would it help or just make it worse? What did you do?
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,871
You had closure. You told him you were done. You can still care about him and be done with dealing with his chaos. At this point, I would think it would make it worse because he would have the opportunity to draw you back into the madness. You've made the break, so stick with it.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 774
in my limited expereince of having no contact with my alo, i have found that breaking no contact brings a lot of stuff up to the surface and its liek starting all over. maybe you could set a time, like if he has been in recovery for a few months you would talk.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 138
In my experience closure is realy only closure when we stop having any contact what so ever and just let the relationship die a natural death. I recently posted here that I got a letter from my ex. It seemed harmless to read it, but I imediatly felt anxiety, telling me that something is wrong. Everyone told me not to read the letters and even return them. Any way I went back and forth with no contact for a long time. I kept getting sucked back in when ever I felt guilty or my ego needed something from him. My ex has been in jail so this has been a blessing for me. I know its hard but take the advice from everyone here and simply walk away!!!!! The people here know what they are talking about, we dont because we are emotionaly entangled. I am doing so much better that it is amazing by simply having no contact and working through the feelings of loss!!! good luck and be strong!!!
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