one week sober
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Scotland
Posts: 60
one week sober
Today I am one week sober, I was feeling really positive, untill last night that is, my sister came over to visit and although she has stated she loves me dearly, she had a heart to heart with one of my daughters and partner, who both expressed their total loss of trust for me, due to all the lies and attempted recoveries before, both have said this is the end of the line, so much so my partner was going to have me move out!!!! How can I convince them that I honestly see and hear things so totally different this time, its like i'm getting constant messages. Getting so much out my AA meetings really feeling the love there.
Nawneet
Nawneet
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,910
Actions speak louder than words. You have to show them that this time is different. It doesn't matter what you say if it isn't backed up with positive progress. Hang in there and keep doing the next right thing. They'll see how serious you are by how you proceed. 
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Toronto, ON
Posts: 1,591
I don't have anything I can say to change what those individuals think or to prevent the moving out possibility.
I can help you to focus in your first week though. That achievement can't be taken away.
I can help you to focus in your first week though. That achievement can't be taken away.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: IL now
Posts: 218
Everything happens for a reason, I believe. Maybe you were thinking about a drink today, and this was the reinforcement you needed to stay away this time for good. Sometimes reinforcement is still reinforcement, even if negative. For many people that negative reinforcement can be locked up in an 8x8 concrete cell, so I'd say being asked to leave still isn't the worst that could happen! I try to learn from everything I do.. This is your time to hear them, and show them. 
Congrats on your week! Keep it up!
Congrats on your week! Keep it up!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Land down under
Posts: 433
sometimes hearing what they have to say hurts but at the same time they have put up with a lot because of our addictions. I don't think it is a bad thing to hear their honesty.
When it happens to me, I just count it as part of my recovery, and realise that my family has every right to recover from my drinking too. If venting is how they need to do it then...so be it.
I count my blessings that my family is still there for me to hear these things and I did not lose them.
Hang in there. You are doing well and hopefully your family will eventually see that as well.
When it happens to me, I just count it as part of my recovery, and realise that my family has every right to recover from my drinking too. If venting is how they need to do it then...so be it.
I count my blessings that my family is still there for me to hear these things and I did not lose them.
Hang in there. You are doing well and hopefully your family will eventually see that as well.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 2,058
Naw - well done on your week. You keep this going regardless of what happens around you.
I know that my drinking over the years had burned bridges that no amount of recovery, HP, etc. will change.
What I do know is that everyday I embrace my recovery I am more and more of the better person I know myself to be. I focused purely on my recovery and the benefits of it have begun to pile up. People see me differently now, they enjoy my conversation and those that do know about my alcoholism....well they are inspired and proud of the work I have done and continue to do.
Only in time my friend will people see the real you. Just keep going and please be true to yourself in that you are doing this for you.
Huggs and know that there is no other way to go but up my friend.
I know that my drinking over the years had burned bridges that no amount of recovery, HP, etc. will change.
What I do know is that everyday I embrace my recovery I am more and more of the better person I know myself to be. I focused purely on my recovery and the benefits of it have begun to pile up. People see me differently now, they enjoy my conversation and those that do know about my alcoholism....well they are inspired and proud of the work I have done and continue to do.
Only in time my friend will people see the real you. Just keep going and please be true to yourself in that you are doing this for you.
Huggs and know that there is no other way to go but up my friend.
Alive in the Superunknown
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 30.47ºN, 98.15ºW
Posts: 1,460
Take care of the thing you can control -- your own behavior. Trust that they will see your sincerity. Let go of what you cannot control; if you don't, the worry and tension can undermine you.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Home
Posts: 23
I agree, actions always speak louder than words but keep the words coming. I promise with actions and words, through time, both yourself and everyone else will see the new you.
Congrats on your week! Keep it up!!
Just 14 or so hours for me. wish me luck...
Congrats on your week! Keep it up!!
Just 14 or so hours for me. wish me luck...
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
Keep on doing the next good and right thing. In time they will come to see the 'new and better you' and will begin to regain trust in you. It takes time, I know, and can be frustrating, but if you keep on staying sober and doing the next right thing positive changes will happen.
31/10/10
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 241
Nawneet, lots of valuable and wise advice here. I have nothing to add. So here's to re-inforce: You can only do the best you can to be the best person you can be. Trust that it will all fall into place as long as you don't drink and work the Steps. Congrats - it must day 8 today!
Hugs and wishes
Vee
Hugs and wishes
Vee
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Scotland
Posts: 60
Comforting
GodPowered,
Thankyou for your words of wisdom, i will read them over and over, it really helped, i'm over powered by the amount of support from sober recovery, it been amazing, having trouble sleeping but i think it's with all thats going on in my mind, all the things i want to change, repair and give back love!!!
Love 'n' hugs Nawneet
Thankyou for your words of wisdom, i will read them over and over, it really helped, i'm over powered by the amount of support from sober recovery, it been amazing, having trouble sleeping but i think it's with all thats going on in my mind, all the things i want to change, repair and give back love!!!
Love 'n' hugs Nawneet
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 28
Congratulations on your week! I am right there with you. My husband has been grilling me a little bit, too, but I'm sad to say I haven't really heeded the good advice here. In fact, because I feel irritable from withdrawal, I'm even more "snippy" than ever. Need to work on that, thanks for the reminder!
My husband has been grilling me a little bit, too, but I'm sad to say I haven't really heeded the good advice here. In fact, because I feel irritable from withdrawal, I'm even more "snippy" than ever. Need to work on that, thanks for the reminder!
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