hello. new to this.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 2
hello. new to this.
so.....uhm.....uhh......hello. not sure what all to say here. im in my late 20's, been drinking on the regular since 21. kinda starting to realize that its not the way to keep on going. weight gain, high blood pressure, lost jobs, and stupid decisions. thankfully never got into any legal trouble. no dui's.
basically im just tired of feeling like ****. tired of spending alot of money on alcohol. starting to become concerned about my health and the direction im taking my life.
for me, there is no "one beer". if im going to crack open that first can, im going through the entire pack. and then some. on average about 12 or more beers a night. not every night, but surely on the regular.
had a bad argument a few weeks ago with my girl while i had been drinking, nearly cost the relationship. pretty embarrassing. had to beg her to come back.
but lets be honest here. drinking is fun. i like getting buzzed. i like the night out on the town, or the football game at home. but these consequences are starting to weigh on me. and it sucks because like i said, there is no "one beer". all or nothing right?
guess we'll see how this goes.......
basically im just tired of feeling like ****. tired of spending alot of money on alcohol. starting to become concerned about my health and the direction im taking my life.
for me, there is no "one beer". if im going to crack open that first can, im going through the entire pack. and then some. on average about 12 or more beers a night. not every night, but surely on the regular.
had a bad argument a few weeks ago with my girl while i had been drinking, nearly cost the relationship. pretty embarrassing. had to beg her to come back.
but lets be honest here. drinking is fun. i like getting buzzed. i like the night out on the town, or the football game at home. but these consequences are starting to weigh on me. and it sucks because like i said, there is no "one beer". all or nothing right?
guess we'll see how this goes.......
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 8,326
sharplikeknife,
Welcome! SR is a great place and you'll find lots of support here.
Once I fully realized that it was never just one drink for me, it was easier to think about not drinking. It's just not fun or helpful to me.
Check out the stickies. Another thing I can say, for me, once drinking quit being fun, it never got fun again.
Love,
Lenina
Welcome! SR is a great place and you'll find lots of support here.
Once I fully realized that it was never just one drink for me, it was easier to think about not drinking. It's just not fun or helpful to me.
Check out the stickies. Another thing I can say, for me, once drinking quit being fun, it never got fun again.
Love,
Lenina
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Welcome to our recovery comunity.....
Drinking certainly turned my life into a miserable mess
All my fun bottles were long gone...and yet...I kept going downhill.
I never knew what day or which drink slid me into active alcoholism.
But it showed in all parts of my life....
I'm glad you are thinking seriously about a healthier sober future.
All my best to you and your girl.
Drinking certainly turned my life into a miserable mess
All my fun bottles were long gone...and yet...I kept going downhill.
I never knew what day or which drink slid me into active alcoholism.
But it showed in all parts of my life....
I'm glad you are thinking seriously about a healthier sober future.
All my best to you and your girl.
Dismember
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: The Mitten, USA
Posts: 1,641
Welcome! Say what's on your mind. We're glad to have you.
That's more or less how it runs, no "one beer." Whether you're an alcoholic, abuser or just stuck in a habit, all of us at some time or another have had to ask the question "is it worth it?"
You're right that there is fun in drinking, but at the same time there is also fun in having a girlfriend, health and a job, right? You might be able to keep the alcohol, the girl and the job. However, you've already suggested that alcohol tends to or has threatened the latter, which seems to suggest you're gambling a bit by drinking. As for your health, I think that's an either or decision since you say you're already having some problems.
A whole lot of alcoholics I've talked to and myself included have all been in this very same position. We were drinking hard a lot and we were starting to make a lot of big mistakes and lose things we didn't want to. What we did was try to devise plans where we could have both. I've heard some pretty elaborate stuff. And in every case they fell through.
I am definitely not saying you're an alcoholic or that you're going to be. I just think a good bit of advise you can take, not just from me but from 100s of people I've talked to, is that there's probably no way of getting around the trade-off. Or at least there's no escaping the risk. If you can't cut down on the beer you drink at one time, it's the experience of alcoholics that one has to stop or gamble with one's health, relationships and jobs.
Alcohol is complex, and you shouldn't take what I've said as gospel truth or anything. In my opinion the best thing is for you to figure this out on your own. I realize I got a little blunt in my message and that's only to kind of warn you of one of the stumbling blocks a lot of people I know and I had faced when we were trying to figure things out. I think if you're just really honest about it, you'll be better off than I was.
Good luck to you, and glad you're here.
That's more or less how it runs, no "one beer." Whether you're an alcoholic, abuser or just stuck in a habit, all of us at some time or another have had to ask the question "is it worth it?"
You're right that there is fun in drinking, but at the same time there is also fun in having a girlfriend, health and a job, right? You might be able to keep the alcohol, the girl and the job. However, you've already suggested that alcohol tends to or has threatened the latter, which seems to suggest you're gambling a bit by drinking. As for your health, I think that's an either or decision since you say you're already having some problems.
A whole lot of alcoholics I've talked to and myself included have all been in this very same position. We were drinking hard a lot and we were starting to make a lot of big mistakes and lose things we didn't want to. What we did was try to devise plans where we could have both. I've heard some pretty elaborate stuff. And in every case they fell through.
I am definitely not saying you're an alcoholic or that you're going to be. I just think a good bit of advise you can take, not just from me but from 100s of people I've talked to, is that there's probably no way of getting around the trade-off. Or at least there's no escaping the risk. If you can't cut down on the beer you drink at one time, it's the experience of alcoholics that one has to stop or gamble with one's health, relationships and jobs.
Alcohol is complex, and you shouldn't take what I've said as gospel truth or anything. In my opinion the best thing is for you to figure this out on your own. I realize I got a little blunt in my message and that's only to kind of warn you of one of the stumbling blocks a lot of people I know and I had faced when we were trying to figure things out. I think if you're just really honest about it, you'll be better off than I was.
Good luck to you, and glad you're here.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 957
Originally Posted by CarolD 
Drinking certainly turned my life into a miserable mess
All my fun bottles were long gone...and yet...I kept going downhill
All my fun bottles were long gone...and yet...I kept going downhill
U stated also that you haven't had any legal issues...YET.
If you continue drinking you will encounter these issues along with others like relationship and employment issues.
If you didn't think that you had a problem you would not be here. Welcome.
Start soberity today.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 5,285
Welcome to SR.
Something I realized was that the occasions where I drank and thought it was fun...they would have been fun without the booze too. Alcohol can make tedious affairs tolerable because it makes you to stupid to notice...just my experience:-)
Something I realized was that the occasions where I drank and thought it was fun...they would have been fun without the booze too. Alcohol can make tedious affairs tolerable because it makes you to stupid to notice...just my experience:-)
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,753
For me, drinking used to be a way to get away from my misery for a bit, but over time it just came to make me sick and made my misery a lot worse.
Welcome to SR!
You'll find lots of support and good ideas here.
Welcome to SR!
You'll find lots of support and good ideas here.
Guest
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 2,013
You can't have it both ways. Alcohol realistically can't be all that fun as you're on a recovery site for alcoholics and addicts.
I was where you're at for a good few years before i finally got sober. For me then the only drink i have to stay away from is the first one, when I took the first drink then I would be taking more and more until I passed out and then drinking as soon as I woke up keep the session going and to kill the hangover/comedown.
Only through staying sober amd working on my recovery was I able to gain the real clarity as to what alcohol made me perceive. For as long as I kept viewing alcohol as fun and a solution then I continued to carry on drinking and drugging.
The only way for me to be able to move forwards in my life positively was by truly accepting that I'm an alcoholic and addict and staying sober 'just for today' and sorting my life out 'one day at a time'.
I used and continue to use AA, SR and much wisdom from elsewhere.
All The Best
I was where you're at for a good few years before i finally got sober. For me then the only drink i have to stay away from is the first one, when I took the first drink then I would be taking more and more until I passed out and then drinking as soon as I woke up keep the session going and to kill the hangover/comedown.
Only through staying sober amd working on my recovery was I able to gain the real clarity as to what alcohol made me perceive. For as long as I kept viewing alcohol as fun and a solution then I continued to carry on drinking and drugging.
The only way for me to be able to move forwards in my life positively was by truly accepting that I'm an alcoholic and addict and staying sober 'just for today' and sorting my life out 'one day at a time'.
I used and continue to use AA, SR and much wisdom from elsewhere.
All The Best
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Kansas
Posts: 63
I'm 38 yrs. old I started drinking around 14 (can't recall) anyway the fun is all gone for me.,waking up wondering what I did this time, getting into fights with my bf in front of kids moving them in &out of the house. Just isn't fun any more. What may be fun for you isn't much fun for the others around you who care and worry about you, that's the selfishness that I had a problem with. A good friend said the other day in reocovery an alcoholics drink is never empty it's always half full. Good luck to you Sharpknife, I'm glad you're here and welcome aboard!!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Dallas, Tx
Posts: 2,405
Hi Sharp, welcome to SR. are those drinking times really 'fun times'? if they are they should be even more fun w/o the alcohol because you'll be there in the moment instead of seeing it all through an alcohol haze. For me when I quit drinking I no longer found any fun in sitting around where others were drinking because I had much more energy and joy I didn't want to waste another second with people getting stupidly drunk and telling the same ole jokes/stories that they'd told a thousand times before, but that's just me.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 2
wow. i hadnt checked in here since i first posted this. im so surprised to see all the replies and great advice. thankyou so much to EVERYBODY here. i really dont know what all to say but thankyou.
i stayed sober the day i originally posted this, but the next day i drank again. went over to a friends house to barbecue, and that led in to drinking beer which led into an all nighter of drinking, and im sad to say i drove when i really shouldnt have been too. ended the night with a huge meal that i really shouldnt have ate. im lucky nothing bad happened beyond all that.
its hard to be in situations where you normally drink. like a bbq, or a football game. they go so well with alcohol. but i hate the consequences of drinking. and im lucky i havent gotten a dui, yet, like tallcactus said.
i guess i just have to take it one day at a time. but honestly, being sober gets boring. but maybe thats what i need to work on, how to manage being sober and keeping myself occupied, i do have alot of things i could be doing, guess im just lazy.
i stayed sober the day i originally posted this, but the next day i drank again. went over to a friends house to barbecue, and that led in to drinking beer which led into an all nighter of drinking, and im sad to say i drove when i really shouldnt have been too. ended the night with a huge meal that i really shouldnt have ate. im lucky nothing bad happened beyond all that.
its hard to be in situations where you normally drink. like a bbq, or a football game. they go so well with alcohol. but i hate the consequences of drinking. and im lucky i havent gotten a dui, yet, like tallcactus said.
i guess i just have to take it one day at a time. but honestly, being sober gets boring. but maybe thats what i need to work on, how to manage being sober and keeping myself occupied, i do have alot of things i could be doing, guess im just lazy.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,345
You'll often hear nothing changes if nothing changes, Sharp - but it does...it gets worse.
I didn't want to change my life either - but looking back now I'm glad I did. I was making decisions, bad decisions, with an addicted mind.
Please don't drink and drive...it's just not the right thing to do on so many levels.
D
I didn't want to change my life either - but looking back now I'm glad I did. I was making decisions, bad decisions, with an addicted mind.
Please don't drink and drive...it's just not the right thing to do on so many levels.
D
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome Sharp! After a couple months, I found that the boredom thing got a whole lot better. It just seems like "life" came in and filled the gap left by drinking. It did take a little time, but I knew where I'd be if I were still drinking and I knew I had to quit at some point or suffer the consequences.
It's also hard to attend drinking events at first (for most of us anyway). So that's something to think about if you really want to get sober.
Hope you'll keep reading and posting!
It's also hard to attend drinking events at first (for most of us anyway). So that's something to think about if you really want to get sober.
Hope you'll keep reading and posting!
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