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Should My Empolyer know?

Old 10-17-2010, 11:45 PM
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Should My Empolyer know?

Im forever having days off 'due to personal problems', but my boss knows I have trouble with depression/anxiety.

Do you think it would be a wise idea to come clean and admit that i have a problem with opiates, maybe try get some help through work?

I've been at this company 4 years and they do have a zero policy against drugs, but they do have support for those who are in trouble.

What are your opinions?
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Old 10-18-2010, 12:43 AM
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I can't tell you what to do because I don't know your circumstances and I've never been in the situation...but if my employer offered support, I'd think pretty seriously about taking them up on that offer, Artifical.

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Old 10-18-2010, 03:58 AM
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Somthing to think about.... it might be better to ask for help than to get fired for constantly taking days off. What kind of support do they offer, do you know?
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Old 10-18-2010, 04:23 AM
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If it were me, I'd hit up NA in my area, get clean and sober - get recoverED - and leave work out of it.
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Old 10-18-2010, 05:49 AM
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Is there a way to get help through work, without talking to your boss. Is there an HR office you can go through who will keep your addiction private? For me, I would do everything and anything possible to NOT tell my boss or coworkers about my addiction.
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Old 10-18-2010, 06:02 AM
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This so depends on the company. My old firm was extremely proactive about helping people with addiction problems and they had options that made it possible to get help without the firm actually knowing. Do you know of anyone else who has gotten help through the company?
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Old 10-18-2010, 08:30 AM
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I dont know anyone else through the company no, but it does state that time off would be offered as a chance to recover, as well as proffesional therapy. It would have to go through my main boss.

Thinking about this all day and I dont really see what I can gain from it, i think i could potentially loose more if i were to open my mouth.
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Old 10-18-2010, 08:39 AM
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Does your employer have an Employee Assistance Program (EAP). If so, it's usually connected to your health insurance and you can contact them directly without having to talk to your immediate supervisor/HR. The EAP is obligated to confidentiality by law. If your employer is part of the Federal Drug-Free Workplace Act, then they MUST have an EAP.

I'm absolutely no expert nor do I claim to know anything for sure, but it's definitely worth looking into. I wish I utilized my employer's EAP (had I only known how it worked!). I probably would not have lost my job if I did.

Look around here: http://www.dol.gov/asp/programs/drug...tance/menu.htm
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Old 10-18-2010, 02:45 PM
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Please look into your EAP if you are not comfortable talking with your manager at first. There could be a very good and viable option that you don't know about.

I work in a large company but a very small team. Everyone knew that I was suffering. Everyone cared but didn't know what to do.

Like you, I'd missed days being sick (anxiety/depression). They could tell that I was really really in a bad place.

One morning, after a horrible weekend of Xanax withdrawl, I just called in sick and checked into detox. I was there for 5 days. My husband told my boss I was sick. No questions, just kind offers of prayers and support.

When I got back, I knew I'd have to right myself after being in a serious episode of depression and severe anxiety and panic attacks. My boss approached me one morning about other people in our department noticing my lack of functionality... and could I provide a doctor's statement clearing me for work? It was at that time I told him about my time in detox and recovery. I was shaking and crying. He was so impressed with me... that I did such a hard thing AND trusted him with it.

He has seen my improvement, and the fact that I'm back to my very capable and functioning self. I'm ME again, and it's clear to everyone.

I even told my close team members. They were proud of me and VERY supportive.

Honestly, I don't give a **** about people knowing. If one other person realizes that if someone like me has struggles with anxiety/depression/chemical dependancy and got help, maybe they can too. I am a testament, not an embarassement.

I don't even spend time thinking about if other people knew or found out. So what? If that changes their opinion of me in a negative way, then that's NOT my problem because I'm the one who did a big huge thing for myself.

I bet your boss and your coworkers have a sense that you are struggling. Research your options for inpatient detox and recovery. Try to do it on a long weekend where you only have to take a few days off. I went and came right back to work. I was there for 5 days, the medical detox is the only way to go. You will have constant care from the psychiatrist, PA, nurses, therapists, and other people in recovery. You will not have to suffer AT ALL. You will be with people like you, people who understand you, and people that can help you rise up from suffering, guilt, sadness, hoplessness, and anxiety.

By the way, the cost for my 5 day treatment was $5000. So far, I've gotten a bill for $348. Insurance has picked up most of the cost.

Good luck to you, keep talking it through... come here when you need to talk! You can do it!

Last edited by Dee74; 10-18-2010 at 03:08 PM. Reason: naughty word
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Old 10-19-2010, 12:07 AM
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Yes my my employer does have an EAP / healthcare. Didnt know it would be so usefull.
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Old 10-19-2010, 03:10 AM
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Originally Posted by DayTrader View Post
If it were me, I'd hit up NA in my area, get clean and sober - get recoverED - and leave work out of it.
This would be my line of thinking also
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Old 10-19-2010, 04:31 AM
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Originally Posted by Artifical View Post
but my boss knows I have trouble with depression/anxiety.
Getting sober ruined a perfectly good case of depression.
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Old 10-19-2010, 06:34 AM
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It may not be fair, but people/companies are much more accepting of psychological issues than they are of substance abuse issues. If you must tell your boss that you need some time off for treatment, I would strongly recommend couching it in terms of anxiety/depression rather than opiate addiction.
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Old 10-19-2010, 09:01 AM
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Antoher thing about the Federal Drug Free Workplace Act that I learned is that chemical dependency (includes alcohol) can be considered a "disability" covered under the American's with Disabilities Act.

Originally Posted by Artifical
Yes my my employer does have an EAP / healthcare. Didnt know it would be so usefull.
Artifical - maybe you can look into your EAP then? The Federal laws of the above Acts apply universally, but local and State laws can vary.

Good luck!
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Old 10-19-2010, 11:16 AM
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I wouldn't disclose to them that you have a problem with opiates since they have a no tolerance policy regarding drugs. This type of honesty may backfire on you and you could lose your job. However, you can be honest and tell your boss that you are having a personal problem or problems that are related to anxiety and depression. In order to deal with these problems, you may need to take some time off.

I am pretty open about my alcoholism, but I do show judgment and restraint when I tell others in work and professional related areas.
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Old 10-19-2010, 11:38 AM
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I agree, there is no need to disclose the details when they don't need to know. Dealing with depression to seek treatment is a legitimate need for time away from the workplace. If you are dealing with a chemical dependance along with it, they don't have to know that.

What matters is that you are a proactive employee who wants to get well. That fact right there is telling of what kind of a person you are aside from depression/chemical dependancy.

I'm so glad that your employer has an EAP. Please put it to use and get well! Look forward to happier days ahead!
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Old 10-19-2010, 11:58 AM
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I had a great job, made lots of money, got to travel around the county and just really liked where I worked. I was also an alcoholic in serious denial and this eventually caught up to me and I was fired w/ 11 years of seniority. Before things started to go bad for me there, I told my boss and used our EAP program. They did everything they could, but I just couldn't stop drinking and they had to let me go. In the end, my boss was angry at me, my employees were REALLY angry at me, and I was so confused about what was going on. It got bad for everyone and it was best I didn't work there anymore. In hindsight, I see that now.

Now I'm working somewhere else and even though I've been sober for almost 10 months, getting sober took me almost a year and in that year I got my 2nd dui. I only mention this b/c I had to tell my current boss that even though I'm sober, I'm an alcoholic (they had NO idea), I'm about to go to jail for 5 days (for a dui I did a year ago) and I'll also need time off work to go see my PO and what not. They are 100% behind me and support me.

My point to all of this is - it's not going to matter if you can't get and stay sober. ...but get help if you need it. I never thought I'd be fired in my entire life and it sure as heck happened to me. One of the many things I can't believe I did

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