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Got a little problem.

Old 10-14-2010, 02:52 PM
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Got a little problem.

Hi all,

To just get right down to it, I am worried my drinking is going to cause me to do something horrible.

It's getting to the point where I drink until I pass out, then I can barely, if at all, remember what i did the night before. Then I'm fairly useless the next day. Then, I will have trouble remembering what I did the day after. Where are my kids? Did I take them to school? Do I have to work today? Stuff like that. Really scary stuff actually.

I would like to say that my sobriety starts today, but I woke up and drank the full wine glass next to my bed.

I want to be sober, but I can't imagine my life without alcohol. And I can't have just one.

Here goes nothing I guess.
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Old 10-14-2010, 02:57 PM
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Welcome kvnypilot

Many of us couldn't imagine life without alcohol. I couldn't - so I kept drinking...and many of the things that I always said were yet happen, happened.

Our lives never get better while we're drinking - scary or not, I really think you owe it to yourself, and I daresay to your family, to stop.

You'll find a lot of support here - you're not alone
D
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Old 10-14-2010, 03:07 PM
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I could not imagine getting through a day without alcohol either.

And, I know my mind became more and more scattered as time went on. Add to that, the anxiety that came along with my drinking, and I was a mess.

Know that there is life after alcohol. You can get through the day and the hard times without drinking.
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Old 10-14-2010, 03:07 PM
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Welcome.

Glad you found Soberrecovery.

Hi Im Sharon and Im an
Alcoholic.

By the grace of my HP and
people like you here in SR
I havent found it necessary
to pick up a drink of alcohol
since 8-11-90.

For that and you I am truely
grateful.


Even after so many yrs sober
I still need AA. I still need the
fellowship of others in recovery
just like many.

No where else can I feel a
part of, belonging to, such
a helpful supportive group
of people like I have here
in soberrecovery and meetings.

I was delivered to the doors
of AA via the back seat of
a police car after family pulled
and intervention on me.

They got me help when i
couldnt or wouldnt for myself.

I stepped into rehab and
recovery and recieved the
tools and knowledge of my
alcoholism.

Once It was explained to
me the what, why, hows
of it then i was able to
take one step at a time,
one day at a time following
those steps and principles
of recovery set down before
us.

I continue even today passing
on my own experiences,
strengths and hopes of
what alcohol did to me
before during and after.

As you continue to read
and share here, you will
see that you like many are
not alone.

Its not the quantity of
days sober we have,
which is special in itself,
but the quality of ur
recovery that means alot.

Glad u r here.
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Old 10-14-2010, 03:30 PM
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Welcome to the best recovery site everywhere! If you can't start your sober journey today, start tomorrow. It'll be a brand new day and just perfect to start your sobriety. As to living without drinking... I too wondered what I'd do if I didn't drink. As it turns out, I can do anything I want to do and alcohol doesn't get in the way. It did take some changes to my way of thinking and living, but those changes were worth the effort and sacrifice it took.

Remember too that alcoholism is progressive. It will always get worse, it will never get better. By giving up alcohol you reduce or eliminate the risk and worry about bad things happening to you due to drinking. Health problems, legal problems, money problems - all are made worse by drinking and in lots of cases are brought on by drinking. So giving up drinking makes your life healthier and safer in lots of ways.

It might be a good idea to ask your doctor for help in quitting, in getting safely thru the withdrawals. And lasting sobriety takes a lot of effort and support. Do you have any plan(s) for staying sober? AA or another recovery program? Counseling? Outpatient therapy? No matter what you do, put your whole heart and soul into it - the results are worth the effort.

I'm coming up on a year sober (never thought I could do it) and am living a far better life in all respects. I'm not wasting money, time, or my health and I no longer wake up feeling like death warmed over and hating myself - again. Living sober rocks! Give yourself a chance to find this out for yourself.
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Old 10-14-2010, 03:32 PM
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Hi, and welcome!

Yeah, I was pretty scared in the beginning, too--but more scared of what would happen if I continued on as I was doing.

If you are ready to be DONE with drinking, the first step is to get it out of your system. If you are blackout drinking, you would probably be wise to see your doctor or go to a detox facility--alcohol withdrawal can be very dangerous.
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Old 10-14-2010, 04:03 PM
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Hi again, and thanks for the welcome and advice.

I don't have plan other than I know I need to, have to stop drinking before I kill someone, hurt someone or ruin my life.

It really scares me to think about what I am doing that I don't know about when I'm drinking.

Anyway, going to try and have a look around here.

Thanks again.
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Old 10-14-2010, 04:13 PM
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Glad you found us. If you were drinking today it may be hard to get a perspective on things. I reckon you'll feel much stronger soon and then you can join our community and we'll be really pleased to talk with you more.
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Old 10-14-2010, 04:41 PM
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Sounds like you're in the right place. Keep coming back here and ask for help. You'll get lots of support but not judgment.

This is a safe place to be when you are as scared as you sound.

Hang in there!
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Old 10-14-2010, 04:48 PM
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bona fido dog-lover
 
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I reckon you'll feel much stronger soon and then you can join our community and we'll be really pleased to talk with you more.

This makes it sound like he's not welcome here until he's sober... and that's not true. Just sayin'...
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Old 10-14-2010, 04:52 PM
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welcome kevynpilot....your day and night sounded like a lot of mine too...especially the wine glass next to the bed....the bruises that i could not explain from stumbling and falling, the thought of breakfast or even coffee making me ill and the many ams started by barfing.

it isn't pretty and it certainly can get worse...you can hurt yourself or someone else. You took a big step by coming here and joining....take another one and call your doc. be truthful and ask for outpatient help (if that is the best thing).

BTW in the year 2009, i only went 9 days without alcohol...and it wasn't by choice. SR is one of the best sites i have spent time on, educational and nonjudgemental.

I didn't have a "plan" either, but i sure did feel better about 9 days after i jumped in with both feet....i'm not perfect, but i have never felt better and sobriety makes me feel balanced, so much less depression, better sleep (not passing out)...and it is my choice to feel well both mentally and physically.. I deserve it and so do you.

read and post, ask lots of questions, there is always someone around to listen.

SR has given me the best gift i could ever hope for, my life as it should be.
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Old 10-14-2010, 06:14 PM
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Warmest welcome! Realizing you have a priblem is the first step.

I also woke up with a glass of warm wine next to my bed...man it tasted nasty but I drank it. Actually found an empty bottle under my bed a month after quitting...ugh!

You don't need a plan to quit...but I recommend getting one as early as possible. Check with the Dr about detoxing...read up on SR...we all have favorite sections...I like the secular forum for example...and have a little hope...it can get better:-)
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Old 10-14-2010, 06:56 PM
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Just popping in to say thanks again, i can tell i will need this place...
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Old 10-14-2010, 09:35 PM
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Welcome kv - The sooner we stop the vicious cycle, the better...... So good for you for addressing your problem now. You don't have to have serious consequences before you put the drink down.

I remember how scared I was when I first came here (and thinking there was no way I'd ever enjoy life again, and maybe I wouldn't be successful quitting, etc. etc.). You're not alone - we all felt the same way at first. Give it time, be patient with yourself, drink lots of water, eat some good food, B vitamins...... and yes, it's best to talk to a doctor.

After the initial days, things really do start to feel and look differently. I found a new strength I didn't even know I had. Hang out here if you have to, to get through the first days - that's what I did and it worked beautifully!
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Old 10-14-2010, 10:52 PM
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Hi KV

Welcome to SR.

I was really scared at first too. Admitting I had a problem was the first step and was a huge relief for me. Living without alcohol for the rest of my life freaked me out - so i began my journey day by day.

I have today, i cannot promise anything for tomorrow but I can today. Doing this, and working on my recovery has helped me reach just over 6 months of sobriety.

You have found a great place with a lot of different advice, but always supportive.

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Old 10-14-2010, 11:26 PM
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Welcome to our recovery community.....

I too was a blackout drinker for years.
I was so : I thought all drinkers were.
Not necessarily true.

The longer I drank...the longer periods of blackouts.
The best news is.....
they ceased immediately with sobriety.

It's always a wise idea to check with a doctor about
how best to de tox. Be honest about your drinking.
Be both safe and sober.

All my best to you and your family
You too can win over alcohol....
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Old 10-14-2010, 11:45 PM
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Welcome here pilot!
I was angry because my choice to drink stole the last 18 months of quality life from me, and for the last twenty years made it less.

I was more afraid of NOT living ANY rest of my life with of alcohol, than living without it, because it is progressive as a dis-ease.

It seems I stopped in time, and look forward to living every day of the rest of my life without alcohol, even the bad ones, as they too shall pass. It is your choice. You can choose to live the rest of your life drinking. Or not, and get into a detox/support program. If you don't try, you can never do anything. Sometimes we try and succeed even to our own amazement.

Professional athletes can't just play and forget about it the rest of the time. They have to practice practice practice. Getting sober is the same thing. One game at a time until the superbowl ring. One practice day at a time for that final success at sobriety.

"Being challenged in life is inevitable, being defeated is optional." -- Roger Crawford
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Old 10-15-2010, 12:46 AM
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In my last reply I wrote "I reckon you'll feel much stronger soon and then you can join our community and we'll be really pleased to talk with you more."

Of course, I didn't mean that I don't want you on board straight away. Don't get me wrong - you're already on our side simply by posting and getting honest.
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Old 10-15-2010, 02:46 AM
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Kvny - Welcome and you have our support.

SR has been an invaluable tool in my recovery. I came here and posted rather shaky and white knuckling it from a devastating bender. Believe me when I add to others....we have been there.

Our first day of sobriety starts somewhere and it might be just looking at that stale glass of wine to get us to post and share. Enough of living the insanity right? I know I spent way too many years on self destruct and thought that there was nothing beyond a life ridden with alcohol. I too thought....how is it possible to do this?

I have gotten sober and I have a good program of recovery that works for me. I needed support and help in changing how I lived my life for the better. Sobriety is a new you my friend and SR is here to support.

Looking forward to your journey. I found doing reading here to be beneficial in helping me find ways to handle the early days and learn about different methods of recovery.

Keep it going!
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Old 10-15-2010, 04:50 AM
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good thought from Kmbr...."the first day of sobriety starts somewhere"

make it today and start yours too.

again, welcome and post often, it is a tremendous help just to put your thoughts and feelings down.
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