gettingsobernow

My husband's parents are coming home today. They were out of town for family stuff and I've been having panic attacks. Mother in laws hates me and is not a nice person. After taking her crap for over 10 years, I told her off in a drug haze last year. I used some really choice words dropped the f-bomb many times. They never came to see me in rehab or called when I in the hospital. I'm a freaking family disgrace to them. Husband's grandma who lost her son to heroin and drinking said she was surprised that I didn't kill myself while using. That's the kind of comments I get. All I ever wanted them to do was love me. I tried so hard but I can't let other's views shape my worthiness. I'm barely feeling better in PAWS and just making it day by day. I hate that they have this power over me. Thanks for letting me vent.

Dee74

I'm sorry things are so difficult right now - you're right about not letting others determine your value....and who knows? maybe relations will improve as you stay in recovery

Remember we're always here for support

D

least

You can't control their actions but you can control your reactions. I hope it's not as bad as you think it will be. Remember you have value, no matter what others may think or say.

gettingsobernow

I'm so scared because my relationship with them is s serious trigger. They cause me pain and I have to learn how to deal with them sober. I had been taking xanax since I met them so this is all very new and scary. I'm sweating just thinking about it.

CarolD

I stay as far away from negetive people as possible.
Works out better for me...

gettingsobernow

I can't believe how freaked out I am. I feel like I'm going to faint. My heart is pounding and I'm actaully short of breathe. Time to lay down.

artsoul

Hope things go smoothly (and quickly!). Just remember that your health and sanity aren't worth throwing away for this person. Sometimes you have to let other people comments go in one ear and out the other. Easier said than done, I know, but just think of it as an exercise and stay grounded.

Whatever you need to do..... ya know?:ghug3

LaFemme

Sending you positive thoughts...try to not let them hurt you....I practice dissassociation techniques especially when I'm around family.

Anna

I agree with Carol that I have no need to be around negative people.

gettingsobernow

My husband and son are at their house which is 5 mins from our house. They have't called and have no intention on seeing me. Strangely I feel relieved.

gettingsobernow

I have just been told that they are throwing a late birthday party for my son tomorrow night. I have to go even though I feel very unwelcome. This really blows.