gr8t2bme

It has been over 40 days sober for me and the devil is starting to play with my mind. I'm getting the STRONG craving to drink a bottle of wine and that I will be able to handle a few glasses.

IT's so weird. I had no craving at all for over 40 days and then it just hit me today while I was at work, this awful feeling that I can drink and a strong craving came over me for a bottle of red wine.

I can't get this demon out of my head. What is going on? I hate it.

LaFemme

I have heard that it takes 3 months for the physical craving to die....I have also heard to play it through to see how awful you will feel if you give in. For me I can't get past the image of taking a first sip without gagging.

Sending positive thoughts your way!

Carrie36

My last real attempt at sobriety I had over a year (mainly because I had been pregnant), then the urge to drink was back and although I swore I would never do it again i threw it all away...it took me over two years of heavy binging to get back to having the strength to try again.

A 2+yr drinking binge...

Dont give up the fight!! It's so hard to get back around again after that first drink!!!

gr8t2bme

It's so Intense. I will not give up by the grace of GOD.

Thank you

Anna

I think it's because your 'addict mind' knows that you are serious and it know that's it's losing, so it wages an all-out attack on you.

Don't listen to it, but carry on doing what you're doing. You'll get through this.

mygirlchandler

What were you doing when you had that urge? Stop and yell NO. Do it outloud!!!

When you beat this night, you're going to be STRONG in the morning.

Lots of love!

LexieCat

gr8,

You might want to check out AA if you haven't already done so. The mental obsession making you feel like you can handle drinking, even when you know you can't, is characteristic of alcoholism. For some people, only working a 12-Step program will make the obsession leave.

susanlauren

What I do when the obsessive thinking about drinking starts is to tell myself: NOT AN OPTION. Then I (sarcastically) go thru the list of things that I like about drinking: "I want to drink so that I can get arrested for a DUI" "I want to drink so that I can jeopardize my professional licensure" "I want to drink so that I can get fired from my job" "I want to drink so that I can destroy my health" You get the idea. Usually by the time I am finished listing out reasons as to why I want to drink, I don't want to drink anymore. SusanLauren

doggonecarl

GR8, it's later in the evening and I hope you are tucked in for the night. I wish I could offer more than, hang in there! I went through a similar episode myself on day 29 and 30. Incredible urges to drink...the strongest since I had quit. Just kept telling myself that was the addiction messing with me. Seducing me back to the bottle. I didn't relent The next day was like the eye of a hurricane. Calm. I can't explain it, craving were gone as if they were never there. I hope getting through that helps the next time it happens, as it likely will. Hope you made it through. Let us know.

least

Ten months ago I drank again for the last time. It was awful. No familiar 'buzz', only feeling sick as hell and hating myself once again. Don't cave in, it's not worth it.

duggy

gr8 - hang in there...saying no is the best thing you can do for you...so proud of you for making it this far!! I hope to be able to do as well as you..the cravings are terrible...but for me, the guilt of giving up even my short time sober would be worse.

You can do it!!! stay strong!

jamdls

I stopped drinking the end of Aug '07 and had no craving until Thanksgiving that year and the craving was intense but I fought it and I won and I really haven't had a craving since. Don't let a stupid conconcoction of fermented grapes/yeast/preservatives/fish extracts/charcoal (yes those are ingredients in wine...) win, you are better than that.

Kmber2010

Gr8 you can do this. I too had some triggers and rough patches early on where I said yeah I like to have a drink.

I came through stronger and sober because I knew it was a lie that my alcoholic mind was spewing. I relapsed the first go because I thought I was ok....I thought I could drink socially again.

I picked up from that relapse and not touched a drink or a drop of booze since. I can not control the alcohol once I drink but I can control the choice to pick that first one up.

Just don't do it. Relapses are an ugly place to be.

Carrie36

When I get that nasty alcoholic brain inside me talking I jump on the computer and start googling all the horrific things alcohol abuse dose to our bodies, what it puts us at high risk of, what the mortality rates are.

Basically I scare myself straight. its not great for my anxiety lol but it really works for me.

Just keep telling myself that its the alcoholic in me talking, and I dont need to listen to her anymore.

Mcribb

I had a friend tell me this story. He was saying man he wants to drink, so he called his sponser, and the sponser told him to write out what was going on on a piece of paper. Who he is pissed at what is going on etc. Well the friend of mine started out writing out how he is pissed at his sponser then he started writing out a bunch of other resentments. Then he started working the steps from there to get better.

coming_clean

try to accept the craving and then let it go....

Eddiebuckle

Gr8t - what you were experiencing is called post acute withdrawal. See the attached link which has excerpts from Terrence Gorski, who has done extensive research on PAW.

Post Acute Withdrawl - Relapse Prevention Specialists - TLC The Living Center

gr8t2bme

I made it through the night without drinking. Thank you all. I feel a little better today. What scared me about drinking is that It did something to my thinking to the point that when I drank I always thought about killing myself and how I would do it. That is when I needed to stop.

I'm scared to go back there.

artsoul

Way to go on getting through it! I had urges too, even months into sobriety. There was one time that lasted for almost 2 days and I hated every minute of it. But I knew that it wouldn't last forever, and it didn't. I treated it like I was sick (maybe I was - sick in the head!) and I turned my attention to SR and read like mad. That helped alot. Eating helps me, too, and getting a good night's sleep.

When I stopped to think about it, the amount of time I had to spend resisting the cravings was nothing compared to all the extras hours I gained from not lying in bed with a hangover! So be patient with the process. As Anna has often pointed out, recovery isn't a straight line - there are dips and turns. But you're doing the right thing and you ARE succeeding!!!:ghug3

Kmber2010

Gr8, I found when I was drinking that I went to some very dark places and had some very disturbing thoughts. Quitting and getting support has removed all of that.

Now that I have a clear mind if any thoughts come up that do concern me....I know to reach out for help. Sometimes in life.....addiction is a mask for underlying problems.

Keep it going!