StuartW

Now made it through 8 days but this evening I found myself trying to convince myself why it would be OK to have the odd glass of wine now and again.

I almost/part way succeeded.

You know, the usual "...well f I just stop after a couple of glasses, and only do it now and again..." type thing. For the first time in 8 days, I envisaged myself drinking again.

I had my blood tests back from the doctor today, which didn't show anything adverse. I'm grateful for this, but if anything it has made the temptation stronger by making me think that I've been worrying about nothing.

Need to refocus on all the bad stuff that drink has led to in the past (and there's plenty of it), but it suddenly feels like a very distant memory. Almost like it happened to somebody else.

This feels like my first big test.

KellySad

Battle Stations - don't give it, Stuart.

8 days is great.

Juneof44

Be strong man! If you know it isn't right for you, then just keep fighting those urges!

duggy

Stuart, 8 days here too! I threw out a whole box of wine I had today...I also conversed with myself that it would be ok. It wouldn't be ok..I can't just do a few glasses..i'd drink the whole box.

YOU can do this...we're at the same place...what i've tried to do is channel my anxiety and "bad juju" in a more positive way...best thing i've done today was be outside in the sun as much as I can..being in the house is a bad thing for me..

If you just wait and let the craving pass, you'll be ok..and hang out here..lots of wonderful people to talk to, to give and get support from and just talk...

hugs

CarolD

I don't think people who do "have an odd glass of wine
once in awhile".......ever consider quitting alcohol.
It's simply a non issue for them.....

hope you stay in focus....and continue your journey
into a healthier sober future.

All my best.....

StuartW

I will!

Do these urges normally come in waves? This one has lasted a few hours but it's started to recede. Crept up on me when I thought I was coasting.

KellySad

I was at an AA meeting a while ago, and went up for a desire chip 1-29 days...and the lady said, "Put the chip in your mouth, and when it melts, you can have a drink."

Good thing to say.

Repeat that to yourself, Stuart - and good luck. You can do this.

StuartW

The experience has rather humbled me to be honest. I thought I was well in control but it was like I became drunk on the thought of getting drunk, if that makes any sense. Need to learn from this, because I could so easily have relapsed.

Thanks everyone, I'll make it to day 9.

doggonecarl

Everyone here has fought through those same urges, faced the same challenges to our sobriety. You can do it too.

keithj

AA's Big Book has a couple of pertinent observations taken from the experience of recovered alcoholics.
And perhaps far more important from a recovery perspective,
There's also a bunch of stuff in there about the great obsession of every abnormal drinker is that he'll be able to someday control and enjoy his drinking. Might be worth having a look at. It describes everything you mentioned.

StuartW

"We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink."

So very, very true. Thanks Keith, I will look out for a copy.

Kitey

Well Done Stuart for fighting the urges .. A glass here and then Doesn't work, I gave up on those thoughts back in July when I quit!

Keep going , we are all here for you!

Dee74

Glad you made it through Stuart. It's a lie - if we could stop at one or two, we wouldn't be here

D

least

The more days you stay sober, the stronger you'll be. I found that around five or six months sober I'd lost the desire to drink. It takes a lot of effort and changes to stay sober but it's so worth it.

artsoul

Hi Stuart - those cravings/urges hit me like a ton of bricks at first, and totally out of the blue. What everyone says is true - they DO go away and you'll be even stronger (and ever so grateful) if you get through them. As least pointed out, after a few months the idea of drinking won't plague you because sober will be the new normal. It's a good feeling.

Way to go on getting through 8 days - that's a great start!!

Snarf

In addition to thinking about the bad things drinking has led to in the past, also try to think about where it could lead in the future. I'm about to have to deal with a whole mess of stuff that never would've occurred if I'd stopped drinking 1 day sooner than I did. Sometimes it only takes that 1 drunk to really screw up some things in our lives. And if you never have another drunk, you'll never have to worry about that happening. Courtrooms, jails, rehabs, gutters...these are not the places that free people belong. My alcoholism has led to many of my freedoms being stripped from me, and it's gonna take lots of hard work to get them back.

Just 1 day sooner.

StuartW

Thanks for sharing that Snarf, that's another very importrant point to remember. They key is that you are dealing with things now, so whatever happened in the past you will be making a better future for yourself even if you have some big hurdles to overcome first. I wish you all the very best with it.

StuartW

I made it through to day 9, and as usual this place was a BIG help. When the urges start feeding my mind with nonsense again (1 or two drinks yeah right!) I know where to come.

Something I've realised today, which will already be obvious to most of you, is that when you stop drinking it changes for the better not only your life but so many others, including and most importantly those you care most about.

Kmber2010

Well done Stuart....it does get better. I agree in that I am a better person now and my life is a better place to be