new to this
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 2
new to this
im new to this so bear with me. i want to quit drinking, but im scared. i have been a heavy user off and on, but never sober. i have a love hate relationship with alcohol. it has caused so many problems in my life and relationships, yet i have so many good memories associated with it as well. is this denial? i come from a family of addiction. my grandmother was an abusive alcoholic, my brother a drug addict, and sister eating disorder. many times i am shunned from the family because my drinking "reminds my mother of her own". so i can never speak about it. i have to conceal it further, even though i wish i could be open about it. i am in therapy, so that helps. i am coming upon graduating from college, which i never thought would happen because of so many obstacles with depression, anxiety, and suicide. so i would think this would be a time of gratitude and elation.......ive worked so hard to get this far and i feel like i know i need to quit drinking. but if i do i want to do it for good.....i guess that is where the fear comes into play.....the inability to stay sober and not accomplishing sobriety. any thoughts please share. i have yet to meet someone battling alcoholism, so i dont feel like anyone can relate, which only perpetuates my denial....if that makes sense. i almost feel dumb when saying "im an alcoholic", like people around me think "ok youre over-exaggerating". is this denial? sorry if i am not conveying my thoughts well.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Welcome,
I had lots of good times drinking. Until I didn't. It isn't denial, you had some good times. Sounds like the drinking is no longer fun for you.
I found AA to be very helpful in my recovery. You will find LOTS of people at a meeting who totally understand where you are coming from. You will probably find it a big relief to have others who "get it".
I had lots of good times drinking. Until I didn't. It isn't denial, you had some good times. Sounds like the drinking is no longer fun for you.
I found AA to be very helpful in my recovery. You will find LOTS of people at a meeting who totally understand where you are coming from. You will probably find it a big relief to have others who "get it".
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,431
Hi runningoffempty
good to have you here - the good thing about SR is you'll meet lots of folks who understand
To me denial is not being honest with ourselves - not admitting the extent of our drinking, or the problems it causes us and those we love.
We all remember the good times - more often than not that's what sucks us back in to drinking...but I think it's important to 'play the tape through to the end' in our head and remember the bad times and the bad consequences that come from our decision to drink again too.
You'll find a lot of support and understanding here - welcome
D
good to have you here - the good thing about SR is you'll meet lots of folks who understand
To me denial is not being honest with ourselves - not admitting the extent of our drinking, or the problems it causes us and those we love.
We all remember the good times - more often than not that's what sucks us back in to drinking...but I think it's important to 'play the tape through to the end' in our head and remember the bad times and the bad consequences that come from our decision to drink again too.
You'll find a lot of support and understanding here - welcome
D
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Most AA meetings are "open" meetings, which means anyone who is interested can attend. Even "closed" meetings are open to those who are unsure whether they are alcoholics.
I suggest you go to a meeting and just sit and listen. You don't have to say anything unless you want to. I think you'd be surprised how comfortable, interesting, and inspiring they can be.
Here is a link that explains a lot of what people are concerned about when they attend their first AA meeting.
To find a meeting, you can call the AA number in the phone book, or go here to find one in the U.S. or Canada.
I suggest you go to a meeting and just sit and listen. You don't have to say anything unless you want to. I think you'd be surprised how comfortable, interesting, and inspiring they can be.
Here is a link that explains a lot of what people are concerned about when they attend their first AA meeting.
To find a meeting, you can call the AA number in the phone book, or go here to find one in the U.S. or Canada.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,497
Hi and Welcome,
I didn't know anyone who was an alcoholic either and when I knew I had to stop drinking, I felt very alone. Fortunately, I found SR and have been here ever since. It's good to be here because I know that here, people understand.
I'm glad you have reached out for support.
I didn't know anyone who was an alcoholic either and when I knew I had to stop drinking, I felt very alone. Fortunately, I found SR and have been here ever since. It's good to be here because I know that here, people understand.
I'm glad you have reached out for support.
.
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Tn
Posts: 48
I too found that coming to SR has helped me a lot, because I don't have others around me,who understand what I am going through and I am very far away from home. It was also very difficult for me to finally seek help, because I couldn't or wouldn't believe that I had a problem with alcohol.
I also come from an alcoholic family on my fathers side, where his mother, father, both died from the disease and his siblings are alcoholics or recovering. My aunt put it best to me when I had a conversation with her on the phone, after an incident due to alcohol and she said, " I can't tell you that you are an alcoholic, only you can tell yourself that you are and seek the right treatment for you. I know I'm an alcoholic, because I can't just have one drink, not even a drop, because then I want more and it controls me". This struck true with me also.
Shortly after that I started going to a day group, because I know that although I had fun times with alcohol, the negative ways it has affected my life, is far more damaging and detrimental than those fun times. I also joined SR a couple weeks after. It helps me tremendously to come here everyday and read new posts and continue to learn from others experiences. I hope you continue to post,because you will find many people in the same situation as you and with that welcome
I also come from an alcoholic family on my fathers side, where his mother, father, both died from the disease and his siblings are alcoholics or recovering. My aunt put it best to me when I had a conversation with her on the phone, after an incident due to alcohol and she said, " I can't tell you that you are an alcoholic, only you can tell yourself that you are and seek the right treatment for you. I know I'm an alcoholic, because I can't just have one drink, not even a drop, because then I want more and it controls me". This struck true with me also.
Shortly after that I started going to a day group, because I know that although I had fun times with alcohol, the negative ways it has affected my life, is far more damaging and detrimental than those fun times. I also joined SR a couple weeks after. It helps me tremendously to come here everyday and read new posts and continue to learn from others experiences. I hope you continue to post,because you will find many people in the same situation as you and with that welcome
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 155
I remember when my sponsor took me to my second aa meeting which he was never there before and i asked him if he knew anybody there and he said no but we will when we leave lol .. i just loveee being sober :-)
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 2,058
Welcome ROE. Glad you are here and sharing. There is much info to read and tons of support and experience.
I can sympathize with feeling alone and not knowing anyone who understood addiction/alcoholism. Like you.....I struggled with it and folks would just tell me to slow down or quit. Like it is that easy just to moderate.
I tossed the bottle and found SR. Here you will find others that understand you and are on this journey. By coming to SR I got the support that I needed to know I wasn't alone and much advice and info on recovery and support options.
Know that you can do this and I think attending a meeting as you mentioned would be truly beneficial.
Keep sharing and know that you can do this. Routing for you!
I can sympathize with feeling alone and not knowing anyone who understood addiction/alcoholism. Like you.....I struggled with it and folks would just tell me to slow down or quit. Like it is that easy just to moderate.
I tossed the bottle and found SR. Here you will find others that understand you and are on this journey. By coming to SR I got the support that I needed to know I wasn't alone and much advice and info on recovery and support options.
Know that you can do this and I think attending a meeting as you mentioned would be truly beneficial.
Keep sharing and know that you can do this. Routing for you!
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