My FIL passed away
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 81
My FIL passed away
He had been fighting cancer for the past several years and he died this past Friday night. He always believed in my AS, even when me and my H lost hope, he always kept believing. My AS took care of him these last couple of months as he became more and more sick. AS moved in with him and was with him almost continuously.
We are all very sad and we are leaning on each other. Me, my H, our daughter and AS are feeling a closeness we have not had in a long time. AS is very distraught but I think for the first time in his life he feels good about himself, because he knows that he took good care of his grandfather. I keep telling him what a loving thing he did, and I see that it makes him feel like he can contribute to life in a good way, he does not always have to be the cause of strife in the family. My H is proud of him too and he has told him so. I don't think we've ever had an opportunity to tell him that before and to mean it.
Now, we must deal with his upcoming incarceration. (still has that warrant for missing PBT/court date from DUI). I guess the optimisist in me is alive and well. I am hopeful that maybe after he does his time, he will make changes. Though, he is still in denial about his addictions, I know that he has faced the truth in the past and I am praying that while he is in jail, he will come to the realization that all his problems come from his addictions and that being clean and sober is the only way.
We have all been through so much and I am believing God for some peace for all of us.
My FIL was a wonderful man and he will be missed greatly.
Love and God's blessings to all of you.
We are all very sad and we are leaning on each other. Me, my H, our daughter and AS are feeling a closeness we have not had in a long time. AS is very distraught but I think for the first time in his life he feels good about himself, because he knows that he took good care of his grandfather. I keep telling him what a loving thing he did, and I see that it makes him feel like he can contribute to life in a good way, he does not always have to be the cause of strife in the family. My H is proud of him too and he has told him so. I don't think we've ever had an opportunity to tell him that before and to mean it.
Now, we must deal with his upcoming incarceration. (still has that warrant for missing PBT/court date from DUI). I guess the optimisist in me is alive and well. I am hopeful that maybe after he does his time, he will make changes. Though, he is still in denial about his addictions, I know that he has faced the truth in the past and I am praying that while he is in jail, he will come to the realization that all his problems come from his addictions and that being clean and sober is the only way.
We have all been through so much and I am believing God for some peace for all of us.
My FIL was a wonderful man and he will be missed greatly.
Love and God's blessings to all of you.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
I am sorry for your loss, Wisher, and my prayers go out for all who loved this man.
It is a gift, a legacy perhaps, that his death has brought you all closer together. I think he would like that.
Big hugs as you go through the days ahead.
It is a gift, a legacy perhaps, that his death has brought you all closer together. I think he would like that.
Big hugs as you go through the days ahead.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Wisher
When a person who is that special passes away, it seems that there are no perfect words that can be said to console you. Your FIL was a special man and it was so amazing that your son took care of him for those last months. That was such a giving thing for your son to do and I'm sure that your FIL was comforted by his presence.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family as you learn to live life without his physical presence in your lives. But his legacy will live on through all of you.
God works in mysterious ways. I'll pray that the time your son spent with his grandfather will move him on a spiritual level to help him toward recovery.
I am so sorry for your loss.
many many gentle hugs today and for the days ahead of you as you grieve.
When a person who is that special passes away, it seems that there are no perfect words that can be said to console you. Your FIL was a special man and it was so amazing that your son took care of him for those last months. That was such a giving thing for your son to do and I'm sure that your FIL was comforted by his presence.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family as you learn to live life without his physical presence in your lives. But his legacy will live on through all of you.
God works in mysterious ways. I'll pray that the time your son spent with his grandfather will move him on a spiritual level to help him toward recovery.
I am so sorry for your loss.
many many gentle hugs today and for the days ahead of you as you grieve.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Home of the Ravens-MD
Posts: 1,316
(((Wisher)))) I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending lots of hugs & prayers your way. Indeed, God works in mysterious ways, he has brought your family closer together and perhaps has given your son the courage to acknowledge what is (his addiction), and do something positive about it.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: central coast, ca
Posts: 1,652
Sorry for your loss.It sounds like your AS had a real opprotunity to be a man and met the challenge. He will have that pride and comfort of knowing he did the right thing which is priceless.
it is what it is
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Griffin GA
Posts: 454
wisher - i am so sorry for your loss - i, too, think it is amazing that your son stepped up and took care of his grandfather that way - i'm sure it had an awesome impact on him in ways that will be revealed as time goes on - my prayers are with you and yours
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
I'm so sorry for your loss...My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Your son's actions touched my heart. I too pray that time in jail will give him time to reevaluate his choices and find a better path. Hugs
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,497
Wisher,
I am truly sorry for this loss. He sounds like he was quite a wonderful part of the family.
I am wondering how the time that your son and fil spent together is going to affect your s, in his future. I am thinking that it can only be a good influence on your s.
My prayers go out for you and your family. especially for your s. remember that fil believed in him, and that is going to stay with your s, for a lifetime, I would think.
May your memories of this wonderful man give you comfort, and ease for your hearts.
hugs,
chicory
I am truly sorry for this loss. He sounds like he was quite a wonderful part of the family.
I am wondering how the time that your son and fil spent together is going to affect your s, in his future. I am thinking that it can only be a good influence on your s.
My prayers go out for you and your family. especially for your s. remember that fil believed in him, and that is going to stay with your s, for a lifetime, I would think.
May your memories of this wonderful man give you comfort, and ease for your hearts.
hugs,
chicory
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