Day 3 and Depression
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 413
Day 3 and Depression
Gotta say i woke up this morning and I felt very demoralized. I am working to day and tomorro which i have mixed feelings about. What concerns me is a life of sobriety seems just as daunting as a life of alcoholism, although I know it is manageable and the latter is not. My point is getting a buzz out of life, etc etc. Feeling lost.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
You are on day 3......that means you are still in your
initial de tox stage. Just stay sober today.
Drink lots of water to quicker flush out the toxins.
Try eating small ammounts of healthy foods.
A brisk walk will make you feel better too.
I find praying immensley useful when I am upset.
initial de tox stage. Just stay sober today.
Drink lots of water to quicker flush out the toxins.
Try eating small ammounts of healthy foods.
A brisk walk will make you feel better too.
I find praying immensley useful when I am upset.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Hey Eddie...... sobriety doesn't have to be that way bro. A lot of ppl "quit" and find themselves in exactly the same position. You may fall into the same category that most everyone in AA falls into where drinking sucked but not-drinking almost sucks worse.
There's a part in the AA book where Bill wrote about it: He fools himself. Inwardly, he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them. He will presently try the old game again, (ie...he'll drink again - DT) for he isn't happy about his sobriety. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.
We have shown how we got out from under. You say, "Yes, I'm willing. But am I supposed to be consigned to a life where I shall be stupid, boring and glum, like some righteous people I see? I know I must get along without liquor, but how can I Have you a sufficient substitute?"
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that. It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous. There you will find release from care, boredom and worry. Your imagination will be fired. Life will mean something at last. The more satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead. Thus we find the fellowship, and so will you.
--Ok.....so you don't think you're alone..... I thought that was nothing but a sales-pitch too
Truth is, AA's not looking for members..it's not like I'm recruiting - lol. The reason I retyped that was because I felt that way myself - I felt the way Bill wrote about (and he wrote about it because probably all of the first 100 who contributed to the book felt that way at some point as well).
I can honestly tell you that sobriety for me NOW is way more fun and way more enjoyable than my life was when I was partying down. I'm not saying there aren't bad days....they're are....but overall I'd never want to go back. A friend of mine with over 50yrs sobriety told me early on : "Mike, you'll find that if you don't have more fun in sobriety you'll go back to drinking - period!" The way I was headed early on, sobriety was no fun...and I knew my friend was right.
I dunno..maybe some of that will resonate with you. Maybe it won't. If it does, you may want to look into AA. I didn't believe I'd find any happiness in sobriety (well, maybe I thought I'd find a liiiiiittle but not too much, yanno) and I was POSITIVE I wouldn't find any happiness being one of those "AA ppl." All I can say is I was dead wrong - but I didn't find that out until I gave it a legitimate shot.
There's a part in the AA book where Bill wrote about it: He fools himself. Inwardly, he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them. He will presently try the old game again, (ie...he'll drink again - DT) for he isn't happy about his sobriety. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.
We have shown how we got out from under. You say, "Yes, I'm willing. But am I supposed to be consigned to a life where I shall be stupid, boring and glum, like some righteous people I see? I know I must get along without liquor, but how can I Have you a sufficient substitute?"
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that. It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous. There you will find release from care, boredom and worry. Your imagination will be fired. Life will mean something at last. The more satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead. Thus we find the fellowship, and so will you.
--Ok.....so you don't think you're alone..... I thought that was nothing but a sales-pitch too
Truth is, AA's not looking for members..it's not like I'm recruiting - lol. The reason I retyped that was because I felt that way myself - I felt the way Bill wrote about (and he wrote about it because probably all of the first 100 who contributed to the book felt that way at some point as well). I can honestly tell you that sobriety for me NOW is way more fun and way more enjoyable than my life was when I was partying down. I'm not saying there aren't bad days....they're are....but overall I'd never want to go back. A friend of mine with over 50yrs sobriety told me early on : "Mike, you'll find that if you don't have more fun in sobriety you'll go back to drinking - period!" The way I was headed early on, sobriety was no fun...and I knew my friend was right.
I dunno..maybe some of that will resonate with you. Maybe it won't. If it does, you may want to look into AA. I didn't believe I'd find any happiness in sobriety (well, maybe I thought I'd find a liiiiiittle but not too much, yanno) and I was POSITIVE I wouldn't find any happiness being one of those "AA ppl." All I can say is I was dead wrong - but I didn't find that out until I gave it a legitimate shot.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 413
Carol you are so kind. Thanks for your advice and I will take your advice. Praying is not my forte but I am going to start. I know I am in the initial stages of detox which I have been before. I will only feel a gradual improvement today and tomorrow. Hopefully then I can have a better angle on things. I wish I could be normal, boring and live an unenlightening life sometimes. It seems a whole lot more hassle.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 413
Day Trader, yes I have thought all this thru as well. I have been at a jumping stage many times. Its the either way feeling that hurts and hollows so much. But Ive got no choice in the matter. All I know is that I gotta eek out some sort of a stable and meaningful life without alcohol and that is a huge challenge for me. Went to my first meeting yesterday and I introduced myself. I went alone and didnt feel a stranger. There were all walks of life there and it was both inspiring and frightening to hear some of the stories. It made me feel like a lightweight. Anyway, my next meeting will be tomoro or monday where I will get a sponsor and do the 12 steps. Ive no choice anymore.
New to Real Life
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: I come in Peaces
Posts: 2,071
The physical detox is depressing and also it's just overwhelming and scary and lonely. The regrets and the fear of the future and all the what if's. It takes an enormous amount of trust to just let it all happen and move through it.
Can you get to a meeting today? I'm actually not in AA but I know it works and if you're feeling unsettled it can't hurt, right?
Take a walk with some music today if you can. You can't be more than a drive away from somewhere breathtaking. I grew up in Cork
Can you get to a meeting today? I'm actually not in AA but I know it works and if you're feeling unsettled it can't hurt, right?
Take a walk with some music today if you can. You can't be more than a drive away from somewhere breathtaking. I grew up in Cork
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Hey Eddie
I couldn't get out of bed on day 3 so your streets ahead of me...it's a depressing and daunting period for a lot of us....but a lot of blokes, like me, have made it through by working hard at rebuilding our lives and living them, one day at time.
You can do it Eddie - I promise
D
I couldn't get out of bed on day 3 so your streets ahead of me...it's a depressing and daunting period for a lot of us....but a lot of blokes, like me, have made it through by working hard at rebuilding our lives and living them, one day at time.
You can do it Eddie - I promise
D
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,509
As others have said, Eddie, you are still in detoxing stage and it's hard to get a clear picture of what your recovery will be like. I really have never seen my recovery as a burden. It has always been a gift to me, to show me the way to live a peaceful life.
Be kind to yourself and enjoy your day!
Be kind to yourself and enjoy your day!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: CA desert
Posts: 1,599
Demoralized and depressed, that just about sums up the last couple of weeks for me, till today. Today is day ten without a drink and today is the first day I think I can see some light off in the distance. It seems like that faint little glo off in the distance is now somehow causing a faint little glow to well up within me, and I'm not quite sure what to make of it. Feeling lost......... pretty much sums up my life over the last 51 years, but for some reason, I don't feel lost today, I feel that there is hope that I can at last actually learn how to live life, with its ups and downs, by living my life differently than I've lived it up till now.
Hang in there and stick around here. This place offers us hope on a daily basis, and that's alot more than we had on our own. Thanks for being here.
Hang in there and stick around here. This place offers us hope on a daily basis, and that's alot more than we had on our own. Thanks for being here.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 163
It gets better, Eddie. Much much better. Soon, you'll have little urge to drink, and those urges will pass quickly.
I went to dinner with friends last night, my first social outing, really, since I stopped drinking 32 days ago. 3 folks were drinking, and the other would've been if he wasn't terminally ill and taking chemo. (That puts things in perspective, believe me). Guess what? Not drinking added to the enjoyment. It didn't detract. Instead of making a damned fool of myself, I got a lot more out of the fellowship and the conversation. And the hour drive home was far more relaxing than looking over my shoulder at every set of headlights hoping it wasn't a cop.
There is life beyond drinking, and it's better. Just hang in there, man. This is the worst part. In a couple days you'll be fine. Believe me.
I went to dinner with friends last night, my first social outing, really, since I stopped drinking 32 days ago. 3 folks were drinking, and the other would've been if he wasn't terminally ill and taking chemo. (That puts things in perspective, believe me). Guess what? Not drinking added to the enjoyment. It didn't detract. Instead of making a damned fool of myself, I got a lot more out of the fellowship and the conversation. And the hour drive home was far more relaxing than looking over my shoulder at every set of headlights hoping it wasn't a cop.
There is life beyond drinking, and it's better. Just hang in there, man. This is the worst part. In a couple days you'll be fine. Believe me.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Rooster Poot, Texas
Posts: 76
You poor, poor thing. I remember that feeling well. I can assure you that is not life; it's detox & detox SUCKS. It is your brain still under the influence. I thought the same thing. You have to go through THIS part to get to the NEXT part~~ but the next part is amazing & it just gets better & better & better.
Drink plenty of water, eat if you can keep anything down yet. Be kind to yourself. That feeling you're stuck in right now? That's prison. But you can see over the walls to freedom now, I promise promise promise.... Day 4 is always better. Day 3 was the WORST day for everyone I've ever talk to who'd endured it.
Drink plenty of water, eat if you can keep anything down yet. Be kind to yourself. That feeling you're stuck in right now? That's prison. But you can see over the walls to freedom now, I promise promise promise.... Day 4 is always better. Day 3 was the WORST day for everyone I've ever talk to who'd endured it.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Between Serenity and Despair
Posts: 522
I remember that feeling, too. It seems like the world is ending. My heart goes out to you.
If praying isn't your forte, have you tried meditation? I found a really cool 8 Minute Power Meditation on iTunes that I use a good bit. It's short, and it's uplifting. Prayer, for me, is freeing my mind for a few minutes, and trusting that things will be okay.
And Carol was right. Drink a good bit water so your body can start to flush out the bad stuff. If you can drink 64 oz. of water a day, it'll make a big difference in how you feel.
If praying isn't your forte, have you tried meditation? I found a really cool 8 Minute Power Meditation on iTunes that I use a good bit. It's short, and it's uplifting. Prayer, for me, is freeing my mind for a few minutes, and trusting that things will be okay.
And Carol was right. Drink a good bit water so your body can start to flush out the bad stuff. If you can drink 64 oz. of water a day, it'll make a big difference in how you feel.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: North Texas
Posts: 39
Hang in there Eddy. That's just the hooch whispering in your ear telling you " you can't have fun without me". I have that little voice talking to me also but as the days add up it gets easier to tell it to shut the F up. The staggering, slurring, hungover "fun" will be replaced by a different kind of enjoyment.... a clear headed, peaceful, energetic feeling that is hard to explain, but feels o so good.
There have been a few threads started recently about the euphoric feeling some get in sobriety....I suggest you go back and read them to see what your in for. Hope you can handle it. LOL
Best of luck, I'll be rooting for you, Marcus
There have been a few threads started recently about the euphoric feeling some get in sobriety....I suggest you go back and read them to see what your in for. Hope you can handle it. LOL
Best of luck, I'll be rooting for you, Marcus
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 438
Originally Posted by myliberty 
Hang in there Eddy. That's just the hooch whispering in your ear telling you " you can't have fun without me".
__________________________________________________ ___________
Yeah, it can be all kinds of rough during the first few days, Eddie. Please hang in there - it gets better, I promise. Keep us posted on how you're doing.
Stephanie
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 302
Hey and congrats on 3 days!! It took me about a week or so to start feeling good about life again. I couldn't imagine life without a drink and days 3-5 were really tough on me. After the full week I felt amazing! Don't worry, you're doing great and you will feel good again. Just keep going because there is a light at the end of this tunnel!!
Congrats and don't give up!!
Congrats and don't give up!!
Awaiting Email Confirmation
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 318
Eddie, my noon meeting today was based on living life after alcohol. I am only on day 15 here so I didn't have much to say in the meeting but I did take away some really great information. Almost all of the people there, the ones who are not new, said that they are enjoying life much much more now that they are sober but...being sober was not the hardest part, learning to live sober and stay sober was where they had to do their work. I like AA but I am certain if that is not for you there are many other programs out there that can also help you learn how to live free and clear of booze.
I do know one thing that I have learned in my measly 2 weeks...I love waking up sober and having no hangover and I love remembering what happened over the last few days.
Is life really fun with booze? Ask yourself that honestly...how much fun was it to feel horrible and hide this addiction the best your could? How much fun are the hangovers and the guilt, the remorse and the self loathing? I have to think that once you are through the detoxing stage and your mind clears a bit...you will have a lot of fun seeing and remembering the things that you would only see through the bottom of the bottle? I was foggy until just a couple of days ago and today I am feeling strong and steady.
You can do this, you can stick and stay...be strong and keep on with SR...we are all in this together and need to help each other.
Hugs...
D.
I do know one thing that I have learned in my measly 2 weeks...I love waking up sober and having no hangover and I love remembering what happened over the last few days.
Is life really fun with booze? Ask yourself that honestly...how much fun was it to feel horrible and hide this addiction the best your could? How much fun are the hangovers and the guilt, the remorse and the self loathing? I have to think that once you are through the detoxing stage and your mind clears a bit...you will have a lot of fun seeing and remembering the things that you would only see through the bottom of the bottle? I was foggy until just a couple of days ago and today I am feeling strong and steady.
You can do this, you can stick and stay...be strong and keep on with SR...we are all in this together and need to help each other.
Hugs...
D.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 413
Many thanks for all your encouragement! I just got in from work and am in bed now. Have to say I didnt enjoy today one bit but I know Im gonna be in better shape by tomorrow evening and early next week. Still lost but not as bad as earlier or yesterday.. Well the fight starts in earnest now. I hope I can salvage a normal life from now on.
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