Had to quit it to quit it...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 2,013
Had to quit it to quit it...
I had to quit booze to quit drugs. I had to quit drugs in order to not drink.
I remember about 3 years ago then it was my cocaine use that I was most concerned about in many ways. Mainly due to the obscene amounts of money that I was blowing on a weekly basis. It's amazing how your standards get lower as you get into coke. I managed to justify spending upwards of £250 on cocaine alone just for myself for a weekend binge alone in my room. A nice chilled one.
I managed to cut down some what on the charlie and only have a big blow out every few weeks and limit myself to just booze but it was very difficult. I remember the cravings for coke when I was drunk were unbelievable. They were insane man, I used to delete all the dealers numbers from my phone on a weekly basis after a big binge and feeling on a big comedown, only to be running around frantically cursing myself for deleted them the following week. I used to charge around to this kids house frantically to try to get some coke or some stimulants to get more f*cked up.
I remember that alcohol was never the same after I had got into using cocaine and other stimulants. Like drinking makes you tired after a certain amount and that's when i used to love getting the coke in, to pick myself back up and feel the euphoric hit of those fist few lines and then just continue to drink into oblivion. I used to act really strange as my short term memory would be frazzled. Like my memory was probably about 1 second or something when i was really intoxicated. I used to be in my roon alone, which is about 10ft*8ft and put my coke down and totally lose it. I would go on a madone as i couldn;t find it and then try to clam down and then i would find it again and kiss the sky in relief! haha, man it truly f*cks your mind up.
I had to quit the booze to give up the drugs. I remeber trying to only drink and not buy drugs many, many times and I couldn't do it, it was torture man. Once I got used to the downer and upper combination of booze and coke then I couldn't go back. It's a powerfully addicitve combination cocaine and alcohol. It goes together so well. It's very popular in UK and there must be a lot of coke heads in UK but somehow coke is so tolerated as you can still moderate use to some extent if you ain't an addict. It is so widely used in UK.
For me it was the booze that was my biggest problem. I am definately an alcoholic first and foremost. But I am definately an addict too. I guess it's good that I accept that as it means I know the score on a daily basis.
There must be many similar to myself in UK I'm sure, but they just haven't hit the jumping off place yet.
Grateful to be a recovering alcoholic.
Peace
I remember about 3 years ago then it was my cocaine use that I was most concerned about in many ways. Mainly due to the obscene amounts of money that I was blowing on a weekly basis. It's amazing how your standards get lower as you get into coke. I managed to justify spending upwards of £250 on cocaine alone just for myself for a weekend binge alone in my room. A nice chilled one.
I managed to cut down some what on the charlie and only have a big blow out every few weeks and limit myself to just booze but it was very difficult. I remember the cravings for coke when I was drunk were unbelievable. They were insane man, I used to delete all the dealers numbers from my phone on a weekly basis after a big binge and feeling on a big comedown, only to be running around frantically cursing myself for deleted them the following week. I used to charge around to this kids house frantically to try to get some coke or some stimulants to get more f*cked up.
I remember that alcohol was never the same after I had got into using cocaine and other stimulants. Like drinking makes you tired after a certain amount and that's when i used to love getting the coke in, to pick myself back up and feel the euphoric hit of those fist few lines and then just continue to drink into oblivion. I used to act really strange as my short term memory would be frazzled. Like my memory was probably about 1 second or something when i was really intoxicated. I used to be in my roon alone, which is about 10ft*8ft and put my coke down and totally lose it. I would go on a madone as i couldn;t find it and then try to clam down and then i would find it again and kiss the sky in relief! haha, man it truly f*cks your mind up.
I had to quit the booze to give up the drugs. I remeber trying to only drink and not buy drugs many, many times and I couldn't do it, it was torture man. Once I got used to the downer and upper combination of booze and coke then I couldn't go back. It's a powerfully addicitve combination cocaine and alcohol. It goes together so well. It's very popular in UK and there must be a lot of coke heads in UK but somehow coke is so tolerated as you can still moderate use to some extent if you ain't an addict. It is so widely used in UK.
For me it was the booze that was my biggest problem. I am definately an alcoholic first and foremost. But I am definately an addict too. I guess it's good that I accept that as it means I know the score on a daily basis.
There must be many similar to myself in UK I'm sure, but they just haven't hit the jumping off place yet.
Grateful to be a recovering alcoholic.
Peace
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 8
coke is mongrel and im glad i never kicked off with it but i know what you mean when you say alcohol is the starting point, start off with a few beers and who knows what you might end up doing, anyway i hope everything is going well now
everything is already ok
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,789
I had 19 years clean and relapsed with the drug that I thought was not a drug - booze it wiped me out for the next 11 years emptied my bank accounts my company my friend list and my spirit.
I wish I had learned booze is another drug and is up there with other Narcotiocs (I had a stroke whle drinking, smashed my car up and was raving mad all the time, other drugs did not do this to me)
I am and an addict and I cant take any mind or mood altering substance as I have no bakes and they will kill my spririt and my body whilst also hurting all around me.
Grateful each and every day to be clean and free, always grateful
I wish I had learned booze is another drug and is up there with other Narcotiocs (I had a stroke whle drinking, smashed my car up and was raving mad all the time, other drugs did not do this to me)
I am and an addict and I cant take any mind or mood altering substance as I have no bakes and they will kill my spririt and my body whilst also hurting all around me.
Grateful each and every day to be clean and free, always grateful
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 5,285
Its funny...they call pot a gateway drug to harder drugs...I think alcohol is the biggest gateway drug out there.
For me I could not separate nicotine and alcohol...they fed each other...but yeah, alcohol was the bad one.
For me I could not separate nicotine and alcohol...they fed each other...but yeah, alcohol was the bad one.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 2,013
Alcohol, Cocaine, cannabis, Ecstacy, LSD, LSA, Shrooms, Speed, Ketamine, BZP, all had one thing in common for me. I always wanted more. To lessening degrees obviously and the stimulants were the one's where naturally I would keep going and going for days but the one drug that had a hold over me like no other was alcohol. There was no off-switch with me and booze. Also alcohol is so dangerous because of the total loss of control during intoxication and the fact that your self-esteem takes such a beating as it's obvious that you're staggering around to buy more booze at 7.30am and then bumping into somebody who live's in your street and slurring away and acting intoxicated. It's not a good look.
Drinking alcohol and taking drugs is not an option for me 'just for today'.
I am an alcoholic and an addict.
Grateful to be sober, Have a great sober Sunday everybody!!
Peace
Drinking alcohol and taking drugs is not an option for me 'just for today'.
I am an alcoholic and an addict.
Grateful to be sober, Have a great sober Sunday everybody!!
Peace
There but for .... You know the rest!dopeless hope fiend
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Here. Now.
Posts: 1,021
For the "addict" we must not be confused about this, alcohol is a drug. For the "alcoholic" a drug is a drug is a drug....
Total abstinence is the only answer for me, for when i put anything into my body it ignites the phenomenon of craving, obsession, and compulsion, and all bets are off. The only way for me to keep from returning to active addiction is not to take that first drug.
Total abstinence is the only answer for me, for when i put anything into my body it ignites the phenomenon of craving, obsession, and compulsion, and all bets are off. The only way for me to keep from returning to active addiction is not to take that first drug.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 275
Great post Neo. You are in such a better place now, good for you. Alcohol was the beginning of it all for me too. Coke, weed, cigarettes...none of that even crosses my mind until the alcohol starts flowing in my veins and then its fair game. I smoked a cigarette a few weeks ago and almost threw up, I used to smoke most of a pack a night while drinking!
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