New =]
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: saint petersburg, fl
Posts: 119
New =]
So I am new to the forums. I posted my story in friends and family of substance abusers. I am in a tough place right now. This upcoming week, (monday in fact) I plan on going to a nar-anon meeting. I could really use some support, as I feel very out of sorts with myself, and quite hopeless in my situation. Being pregnant does not help, and I want so badly to be held and loved by my abf, to feel him close to me and to feel secure again. And to not feel like our relationship is falling apart and I might possibly be raising our son alone. We are so deeply in love, and addiction/codependence (yes, I admit it) is so painful, especially at a time when I should be happy and glowing, when all I want is a hug and tummy rub. And I know that all I have to do is call and he'll be over here in 5 minutes scooping me up in his arms and squeezing me and giving me all that love that I already miss so much.
It hasn't even been a full 12 hours, and I have been unable to sleep or do anything but think of him holding me and putting his head on my stomach and talking to our son. To have that taken away, just because of some stupid, evil pill, is the greatest injustice I have ever experienced.
It hasn't even been a full 12 hours, and I have been unable to sleep or do anything but think of him holding me and putting his head on my stomach and talking to our son. To have that taken away, just because of some stupid, evil pill, is the greatest injustice I have ever experienced.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Hi,
You are doing the right thing for all three of you. You can't fix your b/f--he has to do his own recovery work. What you CAN do is to get yourself healthy so you can be a good mom to your baby, and be a healthy YOU for yourself.
Hopefully your b/f will choose recovery and do the necessary work, but that is up to him.
Al-Anon was a real lifesaver for me when I had to deal with the alcoholism in my partners.
You are doing the right thing for all three of you. You can't fix your b/f--he has to do his own recovery work. What you CAN do is to get yourself healthy so you can be a good mom to your baby, and be a healthy YOU for yourself.
Hopefully your b/f will choose recovery and do the necessary work, but that is up to him.
Al-Anon was a real lifesaver for me when I had to deal with the alcoholism in my partners.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Originally Posted by Lizzaayy 
thank you everyone for your kind words.
my meeting is in 3 hours. i am so excited =]
my meeting is in 3 hours. i am so excited =]
Be sure and post back when you get home!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: saint petersburg, fl
Posts: 119
it was amazing, and gave me so much strength.
do i need a liar, a cheat, a back stabber as my one true love/partner in life? heck no!!
i deserve honesty, i deserve happiness, i deserve love. if anything, i should be getting pampered in the state i am in with 43 days (or so) until my son arrives. so that's what i'm going to do. buy baby clothes and treat myself well. because i deserve it =]
do i need a liar, a cheat, a back stabber as my one true love/partner in life? heck no!!
i deserve honesty, i deserve happiness, i deserve love. if anything, i should be getting pampered in the state i am in with 43 days (or so) until my son arrives. so that's what i'm going to do. buy baby clothes and treat myself well. because i deserve it =]
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