Larkspur

So, I am feeling distressed.

I have a great deal of work to do in the next three weeks and expect to be working every day of the week.

I have a big meeting with a major client (and friend) tomorrow to go over concerns I have around the work I'm being expected to do and I'm anxious about how it's going to go.

I have a date tomorrow night with a guy who's very nice and obviously very keen on me but I haven't been in a relationship for two years and it's sort of freaking me out.

I am kind of broke.

I am on the first day of my period and experiencing painful PMS and associated irritability and anxiety.

So I REALLY want to drink. A few glasses of wine would deal with that anxiety right now. But I don't want to drink because logically I know it would be a stupid thing to do. So how could I feel better right now? I can't solve all the things that are distressing me, so what can I do? How do you all cope when you are distressed?

Lenina

Larkspur,

I come here and read. I post. I eat something I really love, like Cherry Garcia ice cream. I go for a walk. I find something really silly to watch on the TV or a DVD. I like Monty Python, especially "Life of Brian."

Don't drink. It only makes matters worse. Don't attempt to color or cut your hair yourself. It will go badly! LOL I know this for a fact!

I hope this helps.

Love,

Lenina

nogard

Feeling better takes time as we detox and the advice here is good. Needing to 'feel good' is something I had to address and was able to do that with the program of na and with friends.

Feel good that each minute you decide not to pick up but to love and look after you. post here. talk to other addicts in recovery.

Its all about staying clean just for today, forget about yesterday and tomorrow and make recovery No 1 priority above everything else

Dee74

Hi Larkspur

A lot of this seems to be worry about stuff that hasn't happened yet. I'm the same.
I'm a big what iffer - and that fed nicely into my alcoholism.

These days I try to let go of the stuff I can't possibly control...and try and look at things rationally.

Your meeting will probably go fine - I'm sure you're good at your job; and your date...well noone really knows about that, alcoholic or not, do they? It's all part of the dating scene.

If it's really stressing you out, along with the lack of money, can you take a raincheck?

D

firestorm090

Wow, there seems to be an ton of stuff on your plate tonight, none of which would be improved by downing a few drinks. And you know, if you're like me, a few will lead to more. It's hard to make good impressions when we're hung over and feeling like bugs are crawling around in our stomachs, lol.

Funny movies always seem to lighten my mood, and a good book always helps me doze off to sleep better. Tomorrow's a big day, with the meeting and date afterwards. Dating is always a crapshoot, so if he's buying, make sure you order something you really like, then let him pay, lol. That way you at least get a good meal out of it, lol.

Ghostly

Alcohol may help the anxiety but not the problems. Have you tried some face to face support? Counseling? That may be worth a try. Or come to SR. Go outside and take deep breathes. Exercise. Good book. Movie. Plenty of things may calm you.

Larkspur

Thanks guys. Dee, you are so right, I spend a lot of time in the future and it's a stressful place. Need to slow down and be in the present moment more.

Sometimes when my head is full of 'and what about this... and this... and this... and this', it's hard to think simple things like '30 minutes of a funny TV show will make me feel better'.

Lenina, your comment about cutting and colouring your hair made me laugh. I too, know from experience. ;-)

I just made myself camomile tea and put on some peaceful music and stepped away from the work for 20 minutes and I feel better.

coming_clean

do anything but....

I find powernaps help when I got cravings, just for 20 or 30 minutes.

A boeddhist saying, or hindu can't remember:

A sick dog sleeps till it get's better.

Anna

Hi,

I'm glad you're here seeking support.

One thing that helped me early on was to prioritize my commitments and to learn to say 'No'. If the upcoming date with this guy is stressing you, why not put it off to a time when you are feeling more comfortable. Meditating, not always easy to do, can be very helpful too.

LaFemme

I'm with Anna on meditating it helps me immensely:-)

augustwest

when faced with upcoming things i place my focus on the things i can control. the obvious one in your case is the date. if it's causing anxiety or stress you could choose not to go on the date. maybe reschedule. as far as work stuff, i try to bite of only pieces that i can chew. bite off as many small pieces each day giving my full attention to only the piece. the big picture will take care of itself. keep my focus on what i can do today, better yet right this moment, and disregard the rest until that moment arrives.

generally speaking, things that i do on a daily basis to help me 'feel better' are prayer, meditation, good nutrition, going to meetings, reading spiritual/12 step literature, exercise, proper amount of rest, and laughter.

jamdls

Chocolate.

TexasNative

I had a slip a few weeks ago that was caused partly by a feeling of too many things looming, if the date is a stresser just cancel. Sometimes people=unnecessary stirring of emotions when you are working on recovery.