inbloom

21 days sober and I find myself feeling down for the last few days. I've made it through some really big events, most recently travel. Last week was filled with drinking opportunities between client dinners, happy hours and weary downtime when I would look to numbing through alcohol. Drinking was is not an option but I didn't feel quite the same feeling of accomplishment as I did from my first few social outings. It's like, not drinking is starting to feel normal and expected.

I think I may be pushing the envelope a little in going to so many social events. Maybe I'm testing myself a bit too much. Some things I have to do, others I don't.

I would love to hear what others did in early sobriety and if it is normal to pass through lulls where you just don't feel as good. I just feel a bit empty.

Thanks for reading.

ItWillBeWorthIt

Congrats on 21 days! And, for making it through all the social functions.

I am only on day 11, and have not participated in any social functions, however my hubby still has a few beer, but it doesn't bother me. He is going to quit on Monday, he doesn't have a problem, but quitting more so, for me.

You may be pushing it will so many functions, especially if you are not feeling quite as good... I go through ups and downs... and still find myself getting irritable at times and then within 15 minutes I am fine.

Hang in there and keep up the great work!

ninja7

I do not participate in social event with alcoholic often since I quit drink. Keeping our sobriety is our priority.

LexieCat

I think you may be pushing the envelope a bit too much, too. If you go to these events where your presence isn't required, what is your reason for going? Maybe unconsciously you are looking for an excuse to drink? That isn't an accusation, just a question you may want to ask yourself.

"Empty" is the way a lot of us feel after the initial feel-good of no longer beating ourselves up with booze wears off. I think it's because the alcohol was filling something in ourselves that we need to replace with something else.

Are you still going to AA?

inbloom

My reasons for going to social events is really just to connect with other people. Most of my friends are normal drinkers. A glass of wine with dinner types. I turned down an invite tonight for a sporting event where the main activity would be tailgating. No way was I going. I really don't want to drink Lexie. I also don't want to isolate. Just trying to find balance.

I haven't kept up with AA as I'm not sure it's for me.

LaFemme

Hey inbloom..I think its important not to isolate, I know that's what I did when I drank:-) its just a shame that a large majority of socializing revolves around alcohol...keep listening to yourself...if you think there is temptation like the tailgating thin don't go.

I'm not in AA but I have a program of sorts...I am working hard at resolving issues that developed in my life as a result of my years of alcohol abuse. I get a deep sense of satisfaction when I make progress in these areas of my life...I think its only natural to hit a point where not drinking becomes normal and you don't get a sense of accomplishment from it...I think that's good. But if you are looking for sobriety to make you feel good, eventually that wears off and You. Need to look at your life to fulfill you instead. For me that takes a lot of work, since I treated my life like garbage for so long. Hope that makes a little sense...and congrats on 21!

LexieCat

Hey, AA isn't for everybody. I do know, though, that the Twelve Steps are designed to address that "empty" feeling you are experiencing.

Just keep the thought, and if you continue to feel the way you are, it's probably worth considering.

Anna

I agree that getting out and doing things is a good idea.

But, I couldn't be around alcohol for quite a long time. It was just way too stressful for me.

inbloom

Thanks for the support and feedback.

Great advice, LaFemme. About 2 months ago, I began seeing a CBT therapist who specializes in addictions. I continue to see him - it's what led me to a decision to be abstinent in the first place. Lexie, I'm still considering AA and attend a Wednesday night meeting that I like a lot. Trying to stay open to what works for me.

I also isolated when I drank. I'm going hiking tomorrow which is always a lift.