almay777

I had 27 days sober, went on holiday and ruined it. Have been drinking everyday since I got home. So today is day 1 - I was worried to post as I feel like a failure and that I have let everyone down. I dont really know what else to say.

Beard82

27 Days is a great achievement. Good on you for getting back into it today

Dee74

Hi Almay

I don't think there's anyone here who doesn't know how you feel.
You're not a failure and you certainly haven't let me down - or anyone else.

Changing ourselves and our life is hard.


This just means you have to go back and look at what you've done so far - pick out the good bits...then work out where you went wrong...

and, most importantly, look for what you need to add this time to make it work

Welcome back Almay
D

Suzie12

Hiya Almay,

You didnt let me down either and you are not a failure hun, flip through the posts and see you are not alone, lots of people have relapsed at one time or another. The worst thing to do is beat yourself up about it, what's done is done and we cant change that, we can only pick ourselves up and start again. Mentally put the relapse in a box and chuck it in the trash.

We are all here for you hun

Suzie x

almay777

Thank you for your replies. I just want this so much I cannot figure out what made me start drinking again when I was doing so well.

Well I very much hope I can get through today. I have felt better but I have also felt worse.

penny74

That has happened to me 700 times...
Don't be too hard on yourself.

ninja7

Don't worry, be happy! Try again. We are staying here with you, almay! You are on my prayers for Amida Buddha.

mf150

I remember when you thought your couldn't do it the first time. This time, it will be easier b/c you know that you can do it. You did it for 27+ days.

LexieCat

You aren't a "failure"--plenty of people have had slips along the way.

It's worth thinking about what it was that led to your drinking, though. Early sobriety is more fragile than a lot of people seem to think.

There's a good AA book, "Living Sober", which has a lot of good tips for managing early recovery.

Do you have a program? I like AA, but there are other good programs, too. Most people benefit from having some face to face support.

lyddie

((( HUGS ))) Almay - you can do this.

lildawg

Almay, you aren't a failure. You're a winner for starting over with your quit.

I will say you might do some thinking about the situation that led you to take the first drink. I understand taking all the other drinks. I would have, too. But try to think about why you took the first one.

Like Lexie said, figure out what you're going to do different next time. You might decide to find more stuff to do to keep you busy on holiday. You might decide to go somewhere else on holiday.

I'll admit this: Not drinking on holiday/vacation is one of the hardest times for me. I really slammed 'em down when I was on vacation. Not doing so makes me think (on the surface) that I'm not having any fun. The truth is, I can do a lot activities because I'm not drunk. I feel better because I'm not drunk, too. But there's always that little voice yelling it would like some drinks. I've been sober 2.5 years, and I still struggle with this. I am working toward change, though. I want to move forward, and I want to have more fun. I wish the same for you.

Fandy

Almay, you accomplished 27 days, and boom you started again...So you can also STOP again, right here and right now....and you will go much longer than 27 days if you let yourself think you can. figure out your triggers and squash them.

I kind of think my own sobriety is like building the rockwall in my garden (my ongoing sober project)...every rock I add gets me closer to my goal...silly? yes, but it works for me.

Mel8899

Almay, I did the same thing, today is day one for me again. I went on a cruise and the alcohol flowed. I cut loose. I am still unemployed, but I seem to have won the unempoyment case my former emplyee filed against me. I have completed the bankruptcy case and am still able to live in my house until they get around to foreclosing. It has been a really rough 6 months for me.

All in all though, losing my dog in April sent me spiraling down. I am determined to move forward and get through this and will be going to pick up a new puppy on Friday. I learned from caring for my neice's kitten that I definetly want an animal in the house. I miss that.

Let's start again together and get through this!!

Melissa

TexasNative

I had a brief slip this past Sunday, it happens. I was at about 6 weeks and luckily I shut it down after a few beers. I was still sober for 6 weeks though, and I'm not really into the back to square one mindset, the 6 weeks is still there in my eyes.. with a bump in the road Sunday. Take it easy on yourself.

BobGT

Almay, you are not a failure. Think back to when you started your sober journey. I bet 27 days sober would have seemed impossible back then.

Try to learn what caused your slip. Was any of the HALT stuff happening? Did you feel that you had your addiction beat? I have made those mistakes and others.

Whatever happened, just start over. You have much more experience at not drinking now than 27 days ago. Again, congrats on the 27 days.

Best wishes.

SSIL75

Welcome back. I have been struggling too. I keep telling myself that it's an evolution, not a revolution. We'll get there.

CarolD

Welcome back...

Starburst

Hi Almay, well this am, I was up bright and early, unfortunately our time zones dont match and a lot of people got upset because I mentioned your relapse before you did, so admin deleted it, tomorrow, if i can get it to work I willl repost it for you! I am so sorry, I cant be there, where u are and just give u a huge hug and a shoulder to to lean on, you are a very special person and u need to find that in yoursellf, so you can be like a catapillar that transforms into a beautiful butterfly and experiences flying free for the first time. Nobody said giving up alcohol would be easy, but u need to persevere, NEVER give up! You can do this again... Hugs Star xxx

artsoul

Hugs, Almay....... All any of us have is today, so that's what really counts. Keep the positives (the support here, your 27 days sober, and all the other good things about you and your life) in the forefront of your mind.

Tomorrow it could be another one of us in your shoes, and I'm sure you wouldn't judge us either.

Harry01854

Welcome back Almay. As you can tell no one here is going to judge you. The one person you did let down though was yourself and I'm sure you feel bad enough. Look, your back so now just try to keep it in today. Just do this thing, One Day At A Time. We're all here to support you and we all care about you.

Keep coming,

Harry