coyote21

Man, when it rains it pours. The good news about recovery is, nowadays, I can just step back in detached amusement/disbelief, with out getting sucked up in the vortex of dysfunction.....mostly. It still makes me uncomfortable, but at least now I know what to do.

The g-mother called LMC tonight, and of course the first question was where LMC stayed while I was a work this week. I had decided not to share the layoff unless it came up.....see how smart I'm getting!

Any way, LMC got a stricken look on her face and handed me the phone. So I told her I'd gotten laid off last month, but don't worry, we'd be fine what with unemployment etc. Even told her there was a good chance I'd be called back when school starts......no matter. Assured me SHE wasn't going to let anything happen to LMC and me....thanks.

Let the untreated/raging codie tornado begin. Called back 5 min later,
(urgent tone in voice) "had to talk to me, call her back after LMC goes to bed". Now I realize she's half in the bag, nice. I returned her call when LMC went out to play, she again assured me SHE wasn't going to let anything happen to LMC and me......thanks.

Five minutes later, the mom calls, she must have seen the smoke signals or heard the drums.

Five minutes later, my xfil (axw's estranged bio dad, who I haven't talked to for over 2 years ) calls and leaves an angry cryptic message that his wife died last week, and that she was a good woman and I'd treated her like sh!t! Just thought I ought to know. WTF?

About 3 years ago I took LMC up to visit him, against my better judgment, thinking he'd been in recovery for 3+ years from alcoholism. He offered my buddy and me a joint 10 minutes after we got there. Hey, everybody smokes a little weed, right?

I'd only had custody for a few months and he knew what I'd gone through to keep my kid, so he has drugs in the house....nice. I was, um, PI$$ED! Decided I didn't need a guy like that in my life and broke contact.

Ah, let the good times roll.

You know, from my new and improved perspective, this is all just mildly unsettling. But I used to LIVE this dysfunction on a daily basis.

I have to thank HP for this opportunity to see how far I've come, and just how bad it was back there in Dysfunction Junction. It's fascinating, in a bazaar kind of way.

Thanks and God bless us all,
Coyote

transformyself

I'll tell you what I know about the heavens right now. We just witnessed a new moon, not full, in my sign, Leo. And can I just say the whole scene above made my head spin. Crazy people are everywhere!

Late Monday marks the beginning of a new cycle. The Cancer New Moon cycle ends and the Leo New Moon cycle begins. The New Moon in Leo is an excellent time for formulating some goals regarding "all things Leo". Concentrate on new ways to enhance your romantic life, creative endeavors and hobbies, and relationship with children. Think about the keywords for this self-expressive fire sign -- such things as proud, magnanimous, generous, hospitable, caring, warm, authoritative, active, and open -- and consider ways to incorporate these traits into your personality.

The New Moon in Leo presents an opportune time to commit to personal goals that express the positive energies of the sign of the Lion:

* build our self-confidence by discovering our paths as distinct individuals, and express ourselves confidently;
* uncover our unique creative powers;
* make a conscious effort to deal with others in a more personal, involved, and loving manner, rather than falling back on reason and intellect which detaches us from our feelings;
* begin a new romance--whether that's with a person or a creative hobby--or re-commit to our enjoyment of an existing romance;
* commit to adding more leisure time and "play" time to our lives;
* allow ourselves to assert our individuality by taking an educated risk;
* allow our "inner child" to come out and play;
* commit to plans related to games, sports, recreation, speculation, hobbies, children, romance and dating.

With this potent Leo energy, we have the chance to make important changes in our lives that will benefit us well beyond this Moon cycle. It's time to make some plans and to set the stage for reaping the rewards from our new beginnings, as little or big as they may be, in approximately two weeks' time after the Full Moon occurs. Concentrate on new ways to enhance romance and creativity, and to build up your feelings of confidence and pride.

The New Moon occurs at the time of a potent T-square that involves Venus and Mars aligning with Saturn in Libra, all opposing Jupiter and Uranus in Aries, and also squaring Pluto in Capricorn. The Sun and the Moon dynamically aspect all of these planets. These influences present quite a bit of tension and challenge, and issues involved are those of freedom, equality, power, and faithfulness. Deep changes are required of us in order to move forward.

Learn2Live

"But I used to LIVE this dysfunction on a daily basis."
Me too. It's amazing the difference between THAT and serenity, isn't it? So, which do you like better?

"I have to thank HP for this opportunity to see how far I've come, and just how bad it was back there in Dysfunction Junction. It's fascinating, in a bazaar kind of way."
It's amazing how quickly and easily having one, single person in your life, even from 500 miles away, can poison your life and create such chaos and bad thoughts and feelings. I am glad you had this opportunity to practice and learn.