Goat

Well the alcohol kicked my ass again!

I have admitted powerlessness before, but I don't think I ever really felt it. Not like I do now, anyway.

I am totally alcohol's bitch. And I need all the help I can get to keep it from killing me.

I'm not gonna neglect SR anymore. As long as I'm posting here I can lend strength and draw strength, and maybe together we can help each other stay out of the bottle.

I'm sober today and I'm going to stay that way.

-Goat

Zencat

Good to see you back.

Ghostly

Good luck Goat. You can do this.

Chakra

Be strong Goat and empower YOURSELF to do this.

Goat

I think at this point I don't care if I do it myself or if someone else slaps it out of me. I just have to quit. By any means.

-Goat

Fandy

drawing strength and lending strength....I like that, i'm there with you.

Chakra

Do you think it would help you if you could let go of the shame, guilt and defeat you feel Goat?

Goat

Yeah, I do think that would help. That's part of what drives me back to the bottle.

Chakra

Do you find it easy to forgive the people you care about when they wrong you in either a big or small way?

Goat

Too easy, yes. I often let people walk all over me.

Chakra

THEN STOP BEING SO DAMN ARROGANT THAT YOU CAN'T FORGIVE YOURSELF!!!!


Go take a shower-because you probably need one after drinking all night-and try this, REALLY...
Close your eyes letting the water hit your face. Stay there long enough to get a sense that the water is pure and pristine. Once you are there, imagine that guilt and shame are sludge and the pristine water is washing it off of you. Let it poor over your head...run down your shoulders and arms and fall off your finger tips. With your eyes still closed, imagine it going down the drain.
Do this every day if you need too. AND remember how much you deserve a happier, guilt free life. Hey, we may only get one of them, right?

Goat

heh, I knew where you were going with that but I also knew I really needed to hear it

Thanks, Chakra

Chakra

I needed to hear it too when my recovering Doctor told me that was his epiphany towards a successful recovery. Plus I thought the smiley with the frying pan was a nice touch.

Saphie

Hi my friend,
although I've been neglecting SR myself a little, due to lack of time, I am so happy to see you are back and determined to get back on track too.
I'm proud of you and know in my heart that you can do it.
And I guess I can't help you unless I'm on SR too, so let's help each other the same way we did before.

RedMustang

Hey Goat, I just came out of the shadows today and admitted I have a problem---day 1 for me---- and I hear ya. You can do this. I have tried and relapsed. But I can do it again. I have felt the guilt and the pain. I will try to grow, let.s do this together one day at a time.
Time for my shower
RedMustang

Snarf

At a meeting yesterday, the guy chairing the meeting was talking about how each time we go back to the bottle, it gets worse. That struck a chord with me, based on my own experience and many posts I've seen here from people who went back out. So I had to share a bit (and it was a Newcomer's meeting...I like to share at those to take some of the "edge" off of what they hear from some of the other members), and I said how much better my life is today than it ever was when I was drinking. And that great feeling, and the hope for a better tomorrow, keep me away from the booze. But what also keeps me from drinking is fear. The fear that if I go back to drinking, it will be worse than it was before. And the hell I was living in before was unbearable; there's no way I can put myself through something worse than that.

There was a time when I feared everything, and it paralyzed me. Today, I can use my fear to my advantage. I am deathly afraid of being a worse drunk than I was before. And, at least for today, that's helping me not pick up a drink.

Goat

Yep, I just had my shower, and it was nice

I bought this house when I was drinking daily, and I installed a shower in the bathroom with a seat in it, just because it's nice to sit in the shower when you're hung over. It certainly served me well today!

I agree, let's do this together. It will be much easier with a team!

-Goat

Goat

You're right about it getting worse every time, Snarf.

This time was bad enough. I do not want to find out how bad it will be next time.

-Goat

Ghostly

Get rid of that seat on the shower!! Hope you won't need it anymore.

Chakra

Dude and seriously post here before the craving takes over too badly. WE WILL talk you out if it. But then again, you already know that!