ladyamalthea

DH went in for routine bloodwork last week and was told that he needs more bloodwork because his white blood cell count was high.

I had convinced myself that there's nothing to worry about yet, as cancer is not the only cause of a reading like that, but now his mom is freaking out, and she's a nurse, and it's making dh worry more, which in turn is making it hard for me to not worry.

I'm catching the codie in me looking for a way to fix this. Looking for a magic website that will promise me for certain that everything is okay, or that if it's not, I'll be able to save the day. I know that's ridiculous. And I know this is not drug related at all, but at the same time I've come to realize that, in my case, being codependent is a problem in more areas of life than just dealing with my sister. Not being in control of this situation is scaring me.

And I am so worked up right now I can hardly breathe... trying to take deep breaths and calm down...

He says he's going back in for the second round of bloodwork Wednesday morning (if he doesn't put it off, which he tends to do). Please be praying for us. I need to be strong, and I don't know that I could handle that kind of news right now.

I love you guys. Thanks in advance for your support.

Impurrfect

(((Lady))) - I was a nurse, for years, and there are SEVERAL reasons a white blood count can be up, not all of them are horrible. Not discounting anything your MIL says, but we all have a tendency to get "worked up" when someone we love has an abnormal blood test, and I'm no different.

Prayers for you, your hubby, and everyone else. I hope he gets the followup testing done on Wed, and that it's nothing major. Also praying that you all find your serenity through this stressful time.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Kindeyes

During a breast cancer scare a few years ago a very kind nurse told me "Don't worry until the doctor tells you that you have something to worry about." I didn't heed that advice. I worried like crazy. After the biopsy, I was told that everything was ok--no cancer.

All that worry was for nothing. It took over my life for six weeks while I went through the diagnostics.

It's hard not to worry when faced with possible bad news but I think that kind nurse had the right idea.

I hope and pray that you have nothing to worry about.

gentle hugs

MsPINKAcres

HUGS to you ~ hate you are going thru this scare and difficult time ~

also just wanted to throw this out there - where you there when the test results were given? Just know from my own personal experience my ex AH embellished and created crisis, medical "scares" and other issues when there were really NO isses to be concerned about ~

prayerfully this is not the case with you and the test results will come back something minor and easily treatable!

Until you know for sure - all I can suggest is the Slogan Let Go and Let God - even if you have to continue to do it over and over again.

HUGS,
Rita

suki44883

I so wish I could share my gift of not worrying with everyone. My daughter is a huge worry wart and I have tried so many times to explain to her that worry is wasted emotion. Worry never once made anything better. The most important thing is that your husband do the follow up appointment and find out the reason for the abnormality. It could be so many things, but we tend to just automatically focus on the worst thing it could possibly be. I do hope you will encourage your husband to not put off his follow up visit with the doctor. It's so much better to know what we are dealing with than to just ignore it or assume it's nothing, or worst of all, not get it diagnosed and treated early. Hugs to you, lady.

keepinon

sending you good thoughts!

wicked

Worry never once made anything better.

No, it has not. It has never improved my life one bit, or changed the outcome in any way.

Thank you Suki.

CatsPajamas

I come from a long line of worriers, and I can honestly say with the help of great recovery friends I've been able to break that cycle.

Here's a great reading from Courage To Change - One Day at a Time in Al Anon II:


Courage to Change ODAT in Al-Anon II 1/10

I suspect that if I reclaimed all the minutes, hours and days I’ve sacrificed to worry and fear, I‘d add years to my life. When I succumb to worry, I open a Pandora’s box of terrifying pictures, paranoid voices, and relentless self-criticism. The more attention I pay to this mental static, the more I lose my foothold in reality. Then nothing useful can be accomplished.

To break the cycle of worry and fear, I’m learning to focus all my attention on this very moment. I can turn away from destructive thoughts and concentrate instead on the sights and sounds around me: light and shadows, the earth beneath my feet, the pulse of everyday living—all pieces of the here-and-now. These bits of reality help rescue me from “what ifs” and “should haves” by anchoring me in the present. Prayer and meditation, the slogans, and phone calls to Al Anon friends are other sources of serenity that bring me back to this moment. As I shut out the noise, I am more receptive to my Higher Power’s will, and there fore much more able to work my way through difficult times.

Today’s Reminder:

This day is all I have to work with, and it is all I need. If I am tempted to worry about tomorrow’s concerns, I will gently bring my mind back to today.

“The past has flown away. The coming month and year do not exist. Ours only is the present’s tiny point.” Mahmud Shabistari

ladyamalthea

Update:

DH does not have cancer. I found out his white blood cell count was barely over the normal range. They were actually more worried about his blood sugar. He is just on the cusp of being diabetic, which actually doesn't surprise me, given his physique and the fact that I've been slowly watching his blood sugar creep upwards for the last year or so (he checked his sugars on my meter every now and then).

The good news is that he is already in the process of planning weight loss surgery, and he understands that the surgery is not a cure all... so if he can get his weight down now it may be years, if ever, before he actually needs medication for it.

Thanks for letting me vent when I was so upset with worry. I need to take advantage of this opportunity to learn to not worry so much. I can't cure him anymore than I can cure my sister's addiction.

ZombieWife

Just wait for the test results. And do yourself a huge favor, stay off internet medical sites. It may be tempting to look this kind of stuff up, but it will only make the worry worse.

Give yourself some love.:ghug3