Nope, I don't get a break
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Quebec
Posts: 2,708
Nope, I don't get a break
My father called. Slightly upset. He has a bit of trouble dealing with XAH's antics. He received another email on which I was CCed. I didn't get it because of the filters I have set up at work. It's full of the usual, veiled threats, saying he wants to see DD, saying he'll tell her when she's 14 and wants to live with him how I'm a liar, saying that at least he still has DSS (which he doesn't...), saying my parents are on his "list", saying he's got a crack team of researchers working for him who found my aunty's address, which is why he copied her on the email (or rather, my aunt's Facebook account has privacy settings set to public so everyone can find her...duh).
:rotfxko
Sadly, I get a daily report of the blocked emails, so I can see when he writes and it's intercepted. I wish it wasn't this way, but it is.
Seriously though, I'm just irked. Not for me, but for my dad. He's got a heart condition. He's got a pace maker. He's easily disturbed and gets emotional about this because he HATED my being with XAH, and yet continued to come see me all the while getting sh*t on by XAH because he wanted me to know I still have my parents' support and love. This is a man who confided that he wished he'd bought a gun, shot XAH and turned himself in, so I'd at least be free of him even though he'd be in jail.
And I'm worried about my mother's sister, who's now being dragged into this, who's a TOTAL codie and will most likely get up in arms about being threated, however indirectly.
Ok, I guess this was just a rant.
:rotfxko
Sadly, I get a daily report of the blocked emails, so I can see when he writes and it's intercepted. I wish it wasn't this way, but it is.
Seriously though, I'm just irked. Not for me, but for my dad. He's got a heart condition. He's got a pace maker. He's easily disturbed and gets emotional about this because he HATED my being with XAH, and yet continued to come see me all the while getting sh*t on by XAH because he wanted me to know I still have my parents' support and love. This is a man who confided that he wished he'd bought a gun, shot XAH and turned himself in, so I'd at least be free of him even though he'd be in jail.
And I'm worried about my mother's sister, who's now being dragged into this, who's a TOTAL codie and will most likely get up in arms about being threated, however indirectly.
Ok, I guess this was just a rant.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Alaska
Posts: 2,913
Wow. I am so sorry that you and your family are having to deal with this cr-p. I'm glad you're going to be able to walk your dad through the e-mail and Facebook safety and privacy settings. He definitely does not need this aggravation.
for all.
for all.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Wizard Land Downunder
Posts: 2,615
How about he gets a visit from Police and is told to cut his cr*p, stop all contact with anyone connected to you, eg dad, aunts, siblings, friends, or he will be dragged screaming into court for a sanity assessment. His actions are harassment, threatening and beyond stupid.
No-one, least of all a man with a heart condition needs this idiot and his pathetic drivel.
See what cops can do to stop it, at least to your dad.
God bless
No-one, least of all a man with a heart condition needs this idiot and his pathetic drivel.
See what cops can do to stop it, at least to your dad.
God bless
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
I vote for blocking the emails, rather than a visit from the cops. The latter may work, but it also ups the ante and escalates this into a "me vs. THEM" battle from his perspective. If blocking doesn't work, THEN you call in the law.
I used to get insane emails with cc's to his sisters, presumably to show what an evil person I was being. ONCE I caved and sent a detailed, unemotional reply, cc'ing his sisters. I immediately regretted that, and apologized for stooping to his level by involving them.
The second there was no legal need for further communication, I blocked the emails. Simple.
I used to get insane emails with cc's to his sisters, presumably to show what an evil person I was being. ONCE I caved and sent a detailed, unemotional reply, cc'ing his sisters. I immediately regretted that, and apologized for stooping to his level by involving them.
The second there was no legal need for further communication, I blocked the emails. Simple.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 594
I just got another few emails from my xabf. I went back in and took a looks at the way I had set up my filters. Turns out theres a setting for auto delete instead of auto-to-trash. I'm hoping that works. I can't imagine what I would do if he contacted my friends and family. Yuck! Soooo sorry you're going through this.
How long has he been harassing you?
How long has he been harassing you?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Quebec
Posts: 2,708
The last email volley I received was several weeks ago, coinciding when DSS left to go to "visit" his mother (perhaps the end of June). I'm really unsure what happened between XAH and DSS, but from a 2nd hand source, I heard there was quite a conflict and they weren't talking to each other. I'm not certain at which point DSS dropped the bomb on his father that he wasn't coming back to Montreal after the summer was over. Perhaps that's what prompted the first set of emails...XAH was lonely, feeling sorry for himself and figured he'd play the victim again, this time at my expense.
I imagine that this email fest constitutes the next session of strumming the violin strings to himself. He's lonely again and figures he'll harass me. Since I won't play his game, he goes and slams my father and my aunty (who called last night, and was up in arms about all this...she definitely freaked out despite her reassurances to me that she wouldn't).
Last night, I helped my dad modify his email so that all emails from XAH would be blocked and deleted. We changed his Facebook settings. He asked, so I helped him. My aunty however is gunning for more conflict being a World Class Codie; she's just ITCHING for XAH to contact her again so she can "let him have it". As much as I wish she wouldn't, for my and DD's sake, I can't make her do or not do anything. It's very frustrating. She could cause me a lot of grief...
As for the cops, they won't do squat because XAH still hasn't made an overt threat. All we can do is keep a record of his emails.
From what my father tells me (I haven't dared read the emails yet), there's some statements about how he's "repeatedly" tried to contact me to see DD, but I haven't answered, and how he's going to keep all the emails as PROOF that I cut him out of her life. He states he plans on showing her this when she's 14 and wants to go live with him (funny how DSS just turned 13 and suddenly decided NOT to live with his father...). The rest is guilt-trip b.s. about how I only left him with a *tiny* picture of DD which he keeps with him and which he shed hot tears over every day because he misses her SO MUCH!!!!!
*Sigh* where's that tiny violin again? He seems to forget the many CDs and DVDs of photos and videos I burned for him, so he'd have up to date pics of his daughter...but which I STOPPED doing for him when he started to behave even more like than @ss than before.
I have to admit I feel some fear about the legal repercussions of my not answering his emails, BUT he does have all 3 of my phone numbers, knows where I live/work, knows where DD goes to daycare, has my dad's cell phone # and my mother's work #, so he could very well reach out to me via phone and discuss things that way, instead of sending vaguely threatening emails to my family complaining about how I'm evil and keeping him away from his daughter. He's going to get no sympathy from any of them, that's for certain.
And finally, I'm somewhat concerned about the email he sent ME, privately (this was from a month ago or more), saying he still had pics and videos of me doing x,y,z, saying I'm a kiddy porn addict. I'm considering a career switch back into the field of education, and nothing ruins a teaching career like long lost nudie pics/videos of Ms. NoDay...But I realize it may all be the usual crap.
Why oh why hasn't he gotten another girl preggo so he can leave me heck alone??!
Sorry. I'm feeling sorry for myself and mildly sad about this today.
I imagine that this email fest constitutes the next session of strumming the violin strings to himself. He's lonely again and figures he'll harass me. Since I won't play his game, he goes and slams my father and my aunty (who called last night, and was up in arms about all this...she definitely freaked out despite her reassurances to me that she wouldn't).
Last night, I helped my dad modify his email so that all emails from XAH would be blocked and deleted. We changed his Facebook settings. He asked, so I helped him. My aunty however is gunning for more conflict being a World Class Codie; she's just ITCHING for XAH to contact her again so she can "let him have it". As much as I wish she wouldn't, for my and DD's sake, I can't make her do or not do anything. It's very frustrating. She could cause me a lot of grief...
As for the cops, they won't do squat because XAH still hasn't made an overt threat. All we can do is keep a record of his emails.
From what my father tells me (I haven't dared read the emails yet), there's some statements about how he's "repeatedly" tried to contact me to see DD, but I haven't answered, and how he's going to keep all the emails as PROOF that I cut him out of her life. He states he plans on showing her this when she's 14 and wants to go live with him (funny how DSS just turned 13 and suddenly decided NOT to live with his father...). The rest is guilt-trip b.s. about how I only left him with a *tiny* picture of DD which he keeps with him and which he shed hot tears over every day because he misses her SO MUCH!!!!!
*Sigh* where's that tiny violin again? He seems to forget the many CDs and DVDs of photos and videos I burned for him, so he'd have up to date pics of his daughter...but which I STOPPED doing for him when he started to behave even more like than @ss than before. I have to admit I feel some fear about the legal repercussions of my not answering his emails, BUT he does have all 3 of my phone numbers, knows where I live/work, knows where DD goes to daycare, has my dad's cell phone # and my mother's work #, so he could very well reach out to me via phone and discuss things that way, instead of sending vaguely threatening emails to my family complaining about how I'm evil and keeping him away from his daughter. He's going to get no sympathy from any of them, that's for certain.
And finally, I'm somewhat concerned about the email he sent ME, privately (this was from a month ago or more), saying he still had pics and videos of me doing x,y,z, saying I'm a kiddy porn addict. I'm considering a career switch back into the field of education, and nothing ruins a teaching career like long lost nudie pics/videos of Ms. NoDay...But I realize it may all be the usual crap.
Why oh why hasn't he gotten another girl preggo so he can leave me heck alone??!
Sorry. I'm feeling sorry for myself and mildly sad about this today.
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