trailrunrbyday

I am so sorry if this is the wrong place for this post...I just didn't know where it belonged! I have just recently joined this forum. It has been a big step for me to admit (within the last week) that I have a problem and that I may well be an alcoholic. In trying to figure out how to find a healthy path that does not include alcohol....I find that AA and the 12 steps seems to be the way that everyone goes. I guess my biggest problem there is that it seems that a belief in *God* is a big part of the recovery. I have no belief in God nor do I desire to believe in God. So...where does that leave me with a program?

I am curious as to how others find a path that is not based on a religious belief?

flutter

I don't have a specific belief in God, but I'm also not in AA so I guess I'm not qualified to answer! There's an AA forum too, but I think a bunch of people here will be by to talk about this that have more experience than I do! From what I understand you only have to believe in some sort of higher power..

AA or not, you don't have to believe in God to recover.

augustwest

the 12 steps are not based on a religious belief. It's a God of your understanding.

You get to decide what it is. For some the power greater than yourself is the group. For some it's the judeo-christian god. i know atheists and agnostics in the program. most of my friends fall under that category. i have atheistic tendencies, in that i absolutely don't beleive in the judeo-christian creator god concept. i'm buddhist, and god, higher power, whatever... to me in the program is karma, and the dharma.

the key part is that it's a spiritual, not religious program. another key part is that i've found that if you're honest, open-minded, and willing to take suggestions and do some work the program works regardless of what you do or do not beleive about "god".

augustwest

Nope. You sure don't. The term "god" has become quite limited in my opinion, for us that don't beleive in the judeo-christian religions. The concept of 'god' is so vast and personal, but the word has so many connotations now that it's not as useful to describe that which it's attempting to. But in my opinion, any words used to describe "god" all end up woefully insufficient. Just my opinion.

GettingStronger2

The first question that comes to mind when reading your post (and has not gone away since I did read it) is why do you equate a belief in God with religion? I am not a religious person, and I do not belong to, nor subscribe to any particular religion. I do believe in a Power Greater than Myself, however, and I choose to call that God. The word "god" does have a tendency to conjure up certain things for people, but it shouldn't and does not have to.

As for AA, AA does not require a belief in God. In fact, a lot of people come to AA who do not believe in God or any Higher Power. That is something you must decide for yourself. It doesn't mean you cannot find some help and benefit in attending meetings.

If you are like me at all, you may have preconceived notions about what AA is or is not, never having attended a meeting. I have come across a lot of people who have dismissed AA as a way to recover based on these ideas. When I walked through the doors of my first meeting, I had some thoughts about what AA was, but I still went. I went because I knew I needed help, and was going to seek that out where ever I could. Nothing made me go back, other than the support and relief I found when I first went.

I have met Christians, Jewish people, Buddhists, Agnostics, Athiests, Wiccans and more in my meetings. . .all are welcome, all fit into our fellowship. Afterall, the only requirement is a desire to quit drinking.

You have absolutely nothing to lose by going to some meetings (and not all meetings are the same, nor are all groups. IMO, going once to one meeting is not giving the program a fair chance for YOU). But that is your choice.

I am pulling for you. I read your first post and saw a lot of me in your words. ..

RobbyRobot

As others are already saying, AA is a spiritual program and being religious is not in any way a requirement. Chapter Four of the Alcoholics Anonymous book will help explain. Give it a good read.

Best Wishes!

RR

Toronto68

You can give AA a try or just read and post here until you find the thing that works for you. That's what any person has to do.

I wouldn't say that Jesus or "God" from growing up are what I believe in, but I have something else that I don't know what else to call now. A few years ago (or even one year ago) I would have said it was just my mind wanting that, but I don't do the atheist or agnostic routine anymore. I just let it be because it came to me naturally without any teaching or preaching; just through a gladness after quitting my drinking.

LaFemme

That's not exactly true, there are many ways to pursue a sober life.

I actually have a very strong belief in God and consider myself a Christian, however, I am pursuing my own path, and it's not 12 step either, to sobriety, I base it on lessons I have learned from life, my desire to constantly walk on a path that continues to make me a better person and what makes sense for me.

I am happy to see you on our forum and I hope you get a lot out of being here

CarolD

I'm so pleased to see you again.....

In your specific situation you could use the power of nature
and attend a few meetings to see how AA clicks for you.

I also find the CBT approach of SMART interesting
Here is a list for you to explore...

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

There is no one perfect way to find recovery.
Many of our members are happily successfully sober who
do not use a formal program. And some of us do.

Please keep posting with us...we are here to assist you.

murrill

I am one of many, many people who used AA to learn to live sober with believing in a diety. I do, however, credit a spiritual awakening with the fact that I have been able to stay sober for many years. It was a process, one in which I learned to become "right sized," learned to be comfortable in my own skin & in my place in the universe. We have a secular 12-step discussion group on this forum, and you might find that is a good place for you. The point of "HP" in the 12 step programs, IMHO, is to connect with the spiritual energy that flows through the universe. Sometimes I am prone to thinking too much of myself, believing that I am in control; other times I think too little of myself. I call this ego, and it is a barrier to at-one-ment. Spirituality is a state of being where I am joined and I belong.

trailrunrbyday

Thanks to all for the replies and views on what recovery can look like. The town I live in has only several thousand people. I don't feel I can go to a meeting here. I just don't want to share that much of my struggle with the entire town(the last woman in town who went into treatment spread like wildfire in our little town...without those around me knowing how much I could relate to her I was privy to overhearing the whispers of what a mess she is...the whispers of pity and stories of who saw her plastered where....).

I am excited about my future. I hope it starts today.

trailrunrbyday

Without going into it any further I do consider myself a Spiritual person and have comfort with the place that has in my life. That being said, I was worried that any help I would seek would continuously mean defending my lack of belief in *God*.

Thanks for the input!!!!

Toronto68

Trail, if it's easy enough to get around for you (I don't know remote you are from other towns), you could try a community an hour or so away and avoid feeling like you are putting yourself on display so much. Otherwise, you can gain the benefits of group support through online communication. Some people need that in person, but I think it works rather well for many people just by using the online method too.

CarolD

I can understand your being wary....but.....where were you
buying all the booze?
My guess is your secret is not much of a secret.


I was ashamed to be a drunk
darned if I am going to be ashamed of recovery.

Glad you are looking for a better future..

littlefish

I started at meetings far,far away from my community and worked my way in....

Remember that wherever there are cultures with alcohol, there are alcoholics. There are jewish/christian/hindu/etc alcoholics in AA.

Yes, AA is a spiritual based program, but as others here have pointed out, it is a highly personal form of spirituality, of your own definition. It is not organized religion. When I sit next to someone in an AA meeting I don't have a clue what their definition of their higher power is nor do they have a clue about my form of spirituality, and that is how it should be.

If you are worried about the anonymity issue, keep in mind that you mentioned someone went into rehab and it spread like wildfire. Do you know anyone who went into AA and it spread like wildfire? It is an exremely important aspect of AA to protect anonymity...hence the name.

keithj

I've said this often. I came into AA as a staunch atheist who thought the idea of a 'higher power' was a crutch for weak-minded people.

I was beaten, hopeless, multiple failures at rehab and treatment, and I could not stop drinking for any length of time.

I followed the precise directions out of the BB to the best of my ability at the time.

I had what they call a spiritual awakening as the result of the 12 Steps.

Life has never been remotely the same since then, and I consider myself a true miracle of AA.

recycle

trailrunbyday - drunkbynight?

I have to nothing to add to the wisdom given above. I just wanted to say I am glad to see you continuing this exploration. Knowing how BC's liquor sales are set up, Carol (as usual) makes a very good point.

Peace

keithj

Being on the local evening news and the front page of the local paper behind the wheel of a smashed and smoking car relieved me of my reluctance to share my problem with my fellow residents.

That event did not, however, relieve me of my drinking.

Harry01854

Welcome to SoberRecovery Trail. As you can see there are a lot of people here who care and are willing to reach out and help. Reading what you posted and replies, you seemed to have already got a good idea of what AA is and what recovery is. I myself am a spiritual person. And that is what I consider is the back bone of the program, Sprituality.

And as you can tell, religion is not what AA is all about.

Hope to see you posting more and continued progress.

Keep coming,

Harry

Boleo

I know quite a few people who were at least able to do the first 5 steps of AA as agnostics. By then they were already starting to get results which motivated them enough to continue with the rest. As far as I can tell something like half the people I know in AA started out like that.

"First, Alcoholics Anonymous does not demand that you believe anything. All of its Twelve Steps are but suggestions. Second, to get sober and to stay sober, you don't have to swallow all of Step Two right now. Looking back, I find that I took it piecemeal myself."
(12&12 page 26)