KissMyTiara

I was sober for 32 days. I have a sponsor I was working steps with, we got thru #3. She went on vacation for two weeks and just got back. During that time I drank twice. I feel good now and have been working on #4. She told me today that I have to start all over. I understand that my first day of sobriety starts over, but do I have to start the steps over again? I wasn't far and I really don't know what new I would do. I do admit the powerlessness. Thats why I drank. To me starting over puts off the time I need to devote on the progressive steps of finding ways to deal with it. Your thoughts please.

Taking5

I started over when I relapsed in the sense that I redid the steps to see where I had failed. In several cases my failure was simply not taking the next step upon completion of the prior one. I did not have to reach X # of days of sobriety to get there, just review what I did wrong.

It sounds to me like you have some of this to do as well, at least if you are going to keep the same sponsor.

intention

Hi,
Is your sponsor suggesting you do steps 1 to 3 again because she wants to be sure you understand them? or is it because she believes that if you had worked them properly you would not have drunk?

If it is the latter, then I would question that...and whether or not she is suitable to guide you through the steps. I am an alcoholic who couldn't stay sober without working all the steps and having a spiritual awakening.

There is much reference in the book that the only way for the alcoholic to stay sober is to work all the steps. Not everyone in AA believes that and has that experience but that is what the program is, that's why the book Alcoholics Anonymous was written and that is how the fellowship of AA was founded.

Jesse17

Intention made much the same point as I am going to. There are people who say just the first step was enough to keep them sober IMO, the first step is just self knowledge and acceptance. As I grow in AA, I am always having new revelations about what it means to do the 1st step. In other words, every time I think I've completed it, I find out there was more to surrender to in order to say I've done the first step.

IMO, while each step helps me hang on without a drink, it's that spiritual awakening or psychic change that is what ultimately keeps me sober. I needed all the steps to get that awakening.

One more thing...When Dr. Bob started his first attempt at sobriety with Bill W. he had a slip. After the slip, they gave him a drink to calm the shakes so he can go perform surgery. When he didn't come home from the surgery they assumed he was out drinking, but he wasn't he was out doing his 9th step. He didn't go back and do the steps over again, he continued his spiritual growth, and that was the last slip he ever had!

On the other hand, part of having a sponcer is learning to turn your will over to someone other than yourself, and doing the next right thing even if you don't yet believe in it.

Mark75

I am constantly working and re-working the steps... especially those first three... actually step ten is kind of like a daily re-do of steps one through nine... No big deal, ya know... If you did them well and you know if you did, how long will it take to re-do them?

Don't get bogged down in this issue... If your experience is anything like mine, you'll find yourself in those first few steps pretty much daily anyway. Which is, maybe, your sponsor's intention ??

Freedom1990

She is your sponsor for a reason, yes?

There have been many things over the years my sponsors suggested that I do, and I didn't like. That doesn't mean the suggestion isn't to my benefit.

I don't know about you, but my best thinking got me drunk.

Today, I trust my sponsor.

Tommyh

hang in there with your sponsor,get busy,stay sober,and move forward