ericam24

LOng story shore. My bf is a addict. My brother is also an addict. We all live in the same house hold with myself and my daughter and son. Currently they are sober to my knoledge. My ex dh found out that bf is an addict (he goes between beging sober and not. He is threating to take our daughter away from me. I can not even think about looseing her or my other baby who the addict is the father of.
He is currently in Texas out on an oil rig and she is staying with his wife for her summer 1 month vist with them. I am so scared out of mind.

Everyone has there opions, my parents want me to leave. other people say other things.

I got a crying phone call from my daughter saying daddy doesn't think it is safe for me at your house and he wants to take me from you.


I am fighting back the tears as I write this.

thanks for any and all help suggestion.

e

ericam24

No it is not. I just do not know what I can do. I do not make enough to move out at this time. The place where we are living is what I can barely afford. I do not have an option to live with parents or firends

suki44883

First of all, Anvil is right. If nothing else, this should be a huge wake-up call for you. Your living environment is not healthy for a child.

Now, with that said, I would like to take a cattle prod to your ex for getting your daughter involved in this. How frightening that must be for her to have to tell you that. He should be horse whipped.

ericam24

Thanks. He is out on a oil rig, It was his wife her step mom that was rite there when she was talking to me. Then she had the nerve to say oh there is nothing wrong with her, then to get into a pissing match with me. My little girl is 9 years old. I do not bad mouth either of them.

suki44883

Well, it boils down to what is best for your children. You asked if you could lose your kids and the answer is yes, you could, if your ex and his wife want to pursue it. I am not saying that is what will happen, but if they decided to go to court, the ultimate ruling will be for whatever is in the best interests of the child.

Nerdgirl

Is risking losing you kids worth the money you save by having addicts as roommates? Call your church, try to get housing aid, try anything, because you have a lot to lose and I'm not just talking about custody - accidental ingestions, and other perils may be in your kids' future while living with active addicts.

ericam24

Nothing is worth loosing my kids. I am so angry at myself that I have let this happen. Some people say I will loose them some people say I will not. I do not want to take anymore risks in looseing them than I already have.

suki44883

Erica, whether or not you ultimately lose them, the fact of the matter is that your ex and his wife can make your life a living hell for quite a long time if they were to decide to pursue this. Who knows, maybe the wife is just bluffing to cause you mental anguish, but still, are you willing to take that chance?

You said you mother wants you to leave. Is she willing for you and your children to stay with her? I would leave no stone unturned to get myself out of the situation where my children might be harmed or taken away. You can do it, you just have to be resolute.

detaching200

I can only reiterate what these folks have said. Do whatever if takes. it's not worth it.

smacked

Yes you can. Now what?

tjp613

On a practical note, I would suggest you start looking for alternative housing and make careful notes of who you called, what apartments you went to see, circle ads and keep the papers, etc. If CPS shows up on your doorstep you can show them that you are actively looking to change the circumstances.

SisOfAnAddict

Don't be ashamed to ask for help from anybody and everybody. Government aid and charity groups are made for reasons like this! You'd be surprised by the type of help your local welfare office or women's shelter can offer. It's not just housing you for a night or just cutting you a check. When my husband was laid off and unemployment ran out our need to feed the children overtook our pride and we went to the welfare office. Not only did they help with food but they put us in touch with local charity groups and helped us find an affordable car. They helped my husband find a new job. I did not know welfare and the local charity groups offered so much help and I wish we had contacted them sooner.

There is a wealth of knowledge and help is you just ask.

itisatruth

Make a plan. Work towards it. You have decided your children are worth it. Your children need you - a loving, supportive, responsible adult & parent. They are worth it; you are worth it.

Like Sis said, look at your options and don't be afraid to ask trusted people for help.

And remember your signature: