self esteem
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 457
self esteem
I have been taking care of ME, but some days I just feel so low about self esteem. I sometimes feel people are looking at me and thinking wow, she
is weird, she is funny looking etc. Im not stuck up, never was but since my AH left I feel my self esteem has gone down. I feel like I failed as a woman, probaly no one will ever want me, I see couples together and feel sad about what happened to me and again, feel responsible in our relationship failing. I know the 3 c's, very true for sure, but there are moments where I think I should have held on and get him through this (okay okay that was not possible for him nor me)..
yesterday I was sunbathing on a beach, a guy sat down near me and looked over I thought I was going to have a panic attack, I froze, wanted so badly to get up and sit in my beach chair,but I couldnt. I layed there sweating my ass off until he left..
I work out and in good shape, dont think Im ugly but just feel out of place sometimes in public, I judge myself too much now.
I went to a meeting last night ,being there helped me feel a little better so that is good..just wondering how to get through this self esteem feeling down..thank you all for being here
is weird, she is funny looking etc. Im not stuck up, never was but since my AH left I feel my self esteem has gone down. I feel like I failed as a woman, probaly no one will ever want me, I see couples together and feel sad about what happened to me and again, feel responsible in our relationship failing. I know the 3 c's, very true for sure, but there are moments where I think I should have held on and get him through this (okay okay that was not possible for him nor me)..
yesterday I was sunbathing on a beach, a guy sat down near me and looked over I thought I was going to have a panic attack, I froze, wanted so badly to get up and sit in my beach chair,but I couldnt. I layed there sweating my ass off until he left..
I work out and in good shape, dont think Im ugly but just feel out of place sometimes in public, I judge myself too much now.
I went to a meeting last night ,being there helped me feel a little better so that is good..just wondering how to get through this self esteem feeling down..thank you all for being here
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
You are special, don't ever forget that! I found that surrounding myself with my friends help me when I am feeling down and out. They boost my mood, and, thus my self esteem improves. You may be a little depressed, it may take time to get back on track, be patient, take one day at a time.
Others will be here to offer support.
Others will be here to offer support.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: minneapolis, mn
Posts: 2,762
It's true that we must love, truly love, ourselves.
It is also true, IMO, that we receive love from others, and this too, is necessary.
"Mirroring" is what occurs when an infant is looked at lovingly by their caregivers. It is fundamental, and crucial, to their development. I guess I believe that we continue to need that our entire lives.
The trick is, finding that healthy balance. How much do we crave the adoration of others? How comfortable are we in our own skin?
It takes time. Positive self-talk, and being around people who show you love, is helpful.
It is also true, IMO, that we receive love from others, and this too, is necessary.
"Mirroring" is what occurs when an infant is looked at lovingly by their caregivers. It is fundamental, and crucial, to their development. I guess I believe that we continue to need that our entire lives.
The trick is, finding that healthy balance. How much do we crave the adoration of others? How comfortable are we in our own skin?
It takes time. Positive self-talk, and being around people who show you love, is helpful.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
Originally Posted by tam 
...... some days I just feel so low about self esteem. I sometimes feel people are looking at me and thinking wow, she is weird, she is funny looking etc.
Would you be surprised to learn that most people are lost in their own thoughts and world and don't think anything about other people?
I see couples together and feel sad about what happened to me and again, feel responsible in our relationship failing. I know the 3 c's, very true for sure, but there are moments where I think I should have held on and get him through this (okay okay that was not possible for him nor me)..
You are not that powerful. None of us are.
....just wondering how to get through this self esteem feeling down..thank you all for being here
Can you consider volunteering your time to a cause bigger than you?
Living in a Pinkful Place
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 7,545
self-esteem is a big thing I think for so many of us
I know that it is for me - I struggle with it sooo much.
It is a constant battle for me - this is what a friend shared with me - I must read this often . . .
I am precious, I love myself.
I am lovable, I love myself.
I am worthwhile, I love myself.
I matter, I love myself.
I am intelligent, I love myself.
I have a right to my feelings, my perceptions, my recovery and my life,
I love myself.
I am responsible for my behavior, my feelings my perceptions, my recovery and my life,
I love myself.
I have a copy of this printed on my desk so that I may read it often and remind myself to LOVE ME!
Praying today you remember HOW LOVABLE you are and HOW WORTHY you are!!
HUGS, (hope, unity, gratitude and serenity)
Rita
I know that it is for me - I struggle with it sooo much.
It is a constant battle for me - this is what a friend shared with me - I must read this often . . .
I am precious, I love myself.
I am lovable, I love myself.
I am worthwhile, I love myself.
I matter, I love myself.
I am intelligent, I love myself.
I have a right to my feelings, my perceptions, my recovery and my life,
I love myself.
I am responsible for my behavior, my feelings my perceptions, my recovery and my life,
I love myself.
I have a copy of this printed on my desk so that I may read it often and remind myself to LOVE ME!
Praying today you remember HOW LOVABLE you are and HOW WORTHY you are!!
HUGS, (hope, unity, gratitude and serenity)
Rita
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