william
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
william
Hi Everyone. My name is William and I'm an alcoholic. After 40 years of binge drinking I have so far nearly 22 years sobriety all from this program. I've had a problem with the idea that character "defects" go away with sobriety since mine, which I prefer to call "personality characteristics", seem to linger on. But what the program has done for me is to help me cope with these characteristics and mature in ways which I never had a chance to do when I was drinking.
I'm not a church goer but I do believe in a divine spiritual presence as my higher power. But that doesn't mean that everyone has to do that. All they need do is work the program and believe that they can't do it alone, or at least that they shouldn't try to do that, since it's too risky. In doing the program I found some of the "God Stuff" in the Big Book a little troublesome since sometimes they referred to "God" instead of a "Higher Power". Seemed to fluctuate back and forth. I'm not a Church goer but I do believe in a spiritual presence behind things somewhere which is ready to help us out. Don't pray much but maybe what I do is more like meditation. Anyway, they say that AA is for everyone (religious people or folks who aren't so religious or who don't think they are) who sincerely want to stop drinking and that all you have to do is go to meetings and realize that you can't do it alone or better not try. And as far as the Book saying that if you do this your character defects will go away, well what I've found in 22 years is that mine, which I prefer to call personality characteristics (so as to get away a little from the traditional view that I drank because I was "bad" instead of being "bad" because I drank). Well those personality characteristics still hang around after 22 years, but the program has helped me in so many ways to cope with those. And for that I'm truly grateful. I've posted a website Alcoholism, Agnostics, "God Stuff" "Higher Power" Character in case folks want to get a little more detail as to where I've been and where I'm at. There's no drunkalogue there (although I have one written out too) but there's lots of hope and lots of gratefulness. This program saved my life and gave back to me what I had lost. It's as simple as that. And it doesn't have to be complicated ("Keep it Simple!") Just go to meetings and hopefully find a good sponsor to help out.
I went to a meeting recently and a guy said that what you get from the program isn't really yours to keep but you should give it back, which I take is the 12th Step. So I'm going to try to give back what the Program has given me.
Thanks for letting me share
William
I'm not a church goer but I do believe in a divine spiritual presence as my higher power. But that doesn't mean that everyone has to do that. All they need do is work the program and believe that they can't do it alone, or at least that they shouldn't try to do that, since it's too risky. In doing the program I found some of the "God Stuff" in the Big Book a little troublesome since sometimes they referred to "God" instead of a "Higher Power". Seemed to fluctuate back and forth. I'm not a Church goer but I do believe in a spiritual presence behind things somewhere which is ready to help us out. Don't pray much but maybe what I do is more like meditation. Anyway, they say that AA is for everyone (religious people or folks who aren't so religious or who don't think they are) who sincerely want to stop drinking and that all you have to do is go to meetings and realize that you can't do it alone or better not try. And as far as the Book saying that if you do this your character defects will go away, well what I've found in 22 years is that mine, which I prefer to call personality characteristics (so as to get away a little from the traditional view that I drank because I was "bad" instead of being "bad" because I drank). Well those personality characteristics still hang around after 22 years, but the program has helped me in so many ways to cope with those. And for that I'm truly grateful. I've posted a website Alcoholism, Agnostics, "God Stuff" "Higher Power" Character in case folks want to get a little more detail as to where I've been and where I'm at. There's no drunkalogue there (although I have one written out too) but there's lots of hope and lots of gratefulness. This program saved my life and gave back to me what I had lost. It's as simple as that. And it doesn't have to be complicated ("Keep it Simple!") Just go to meetings and hopefully find a good sponsor to help out.
I went to a meeting recently and a guy said that what you get from the program isn't really yours to keep but you should give it back, which I take is the 12th Step. So I'm going to try to give back what the Program has given me.
Thanks for letting me share
William
Last edited by Dee74; 06-24-2010 at 02:49 PM.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Hi Clifty Two!
Thanks so much for your kind words! It helps since some folks have problems with the idea that there may be some genetic factors involved (I thought that the experts have pretty much weighed in on the side of that without however locating the actual genes involved) and some folks are also quite hostile to the AA Program itself, sometimes suggesting that alcoholics can "learn" to drink responsibly if they only can get over their trauma from parental abuse, depression, etc. All I can do is speak from my own experience and say that I got nowhere with 1-1 counseling and attempting to drink "responsibiy". Then I got into AA and, despite some issues I had with some of it, it really turned my life around. Good luck.
William
Thanks so much for your kind words! It helps since some folks have problems with the idea that there may be some genetic factors involved (I thought that the experts have pretty much weighed in on the side of that without however locating the actual genes involved) and some folks are also quite hostile to the AA Program itself, sometimes suggesting that alcoholics can "learn" to drink responsibly if they only can get over their trauma from parental abuse, depression, etc. All I can do is speak from my own experience and say that I got nowhere with 1-1 counseling and attempting to drink "responsibiy". Then I got into AA and, despite some issues I had with some of it, it really turned my life around. Good luck.
William
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,236
Hi William, Im Sharon and
Im an Alcoholic.
By the Grace of my HP and
people like you here in SR
I havent found it necessary
to pick up a drink of alcohol
since 8-11-90.
For that and you I am truely
grateful.
Glad to see another member
with a number of one days
at a time collected together
to get a many yrs. sober down
the road.
Welcome to Sober Recovery.
This place has been another
awesome tool I have been using
in my recovery program. Another
place to share our own ESH of
what it was like before during
and after alcohol to the newcomer.
Im an Alcoholic.
By the Grace of my HP and
people like you here in SR
I havent found it necessary
to pick up a drink of alcohol
since 8-11-90.
For that and you I am truely
grateful.
Glad to see another member
with a number of one days
at a time collected together
to get a many yrs. sober down
the road.
Welcome to Sober Recovery.
This place has been another
awesome tool I have been using
in my recovery program. Another
place to share our own ESH of
what it was like before during
and after alcohol to the newcomer.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Thanks aasharon90, sailor john, coffeenut and smacked for your very upbeat and supportive replies. Since alcohol is a depressant, it helps to have folks around who are looking on the bright side and what I know is that the longer you work the program the brighter things get. It's hard at first but it sure is worthwhile. All the best to you out there!
William
William
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Clifty2: I've added you as a friend and contact(at least I think I did since I am new at this computer site). Thanks for your interest and concern and all the best of luck to you!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 174
Hey William, glad you're here!
I'm about 2 1/2 months sober so far and have been going to AA for that time. I find it simply amazing. I did my first chair yesterday and everyone has been absolutely fantastic.The lessons in honesty and courage I receive every time I go have helped me a lot.
I still haven't gotten a sponsor but this is something I definitely plan on doing.
I'm a bit stuck with the higher power. I think about philosophy an awful lot. I mean down to the quantum mechanics level. But I still believe in the essential goodness of people, and I know one thing for sure - Whenever I'm feeling down if I throw some love out there it's always returned.
For me the essence of AA is a load of alcoholics all helping each other stay sober. I think people can be overly critical of the "God" part of AA, and it's a shame that so many people would be turned away by this. I don't say the lords prayer at the end when everyone else says it, but I most definitely say the serenity prayer. I will never judge someone for believing in something I don't, because the truth is we will never know anything about anything in our lifetimes. We're perennial students in this life and the biggest mistake we can make is that we know it all.
I had to leave my "I know it all and I'm not listening to anyone else" attitude at the door when I came to AA. And I'm eternally grateful I did.
I'm about 2 1/2 months sober so far and have been going to AA for that time. I find it simply amazing. I did my first chair yesterday and everyone has been absolutely fantastic.The lessons in honesty and courage I receive every time I go have helped me a lot.
I still haven't gotten a sponsor but this is something I definitely plan on doing.
I'm a bit stuck with the higher power. I think about philosophy an awful lot. I mean down to the quantum mechanics level. But I still believe in the essential goodness of people, and I know one thing for sure - Whenever I'm feeling down if I throw some love out there it's always returned.
For me the essence of AA is a load of alcoholics all helping each other stay sober. I think people can be overly critical of the "God" part of AA, and it's a shame that so many people would be turned away by this. I don't say the lords prayer at the end when everyone else says it, but I most definitely say the serenity prayer. I will never judge someone for believing in something I don't, because the truth is we will never know anything about anything in our lifetimes. We're perennial students in this life and the biggest mistake we can make is that we know it all.
I had to leave my "I know it all and I'm not listening to anyone else" attitude at the door when I came to AA. And I'm eternally grateful I did.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Good for you Ronan! Looks like you're on your way! The God Stuff in AA means different things to different folks and that's O.K. since the Program is flexible enough to take everyone in. The only requirement is the wish to stay sober. And it's wonderful the way all these folks support one another. Every good wish.
William
William
seeking recovery
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: NSW
Posts: 171
Dear William,
I have just read your website and wish to thankyou for your most wise understanding of alcoholism and AA...how you expressed this, truly resonated with me and where I am at today..a prayer answered!
I have just read your website and wish to thankyou for your most wise understanding of alcoholism and AA...how you expressed this, truly resonated with me and where I am at today..a prayer answered!
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