Happy Fathers Day everyone
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Whistler, British Columbia
Posts: 222
Happy Fathers Day everyone
To all the fathers out there, have fun on your day!
Today makes 30 days from weed/booze. I have not had this many days away from everything since my teens.
Every day from this point is a new record
There is a big negative to all of this right now that I never thought would happen and not sure how to handle it.
I will not drink or smoke, but damn... wondering what is the point right now.
Going for a long walk. I will be back later.
Today makes 30 days from weed/booze. I have not had this many days away from everything since my teens.
Every day from this point is a new record
There is a big negative to all of this right now that I never thought would happen and not sure how to handle it.
I will not drink or smoke, but damn... wondering what is the point right now.
Going for a long walk. I will be back later.
It`s ok to stay sober
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Central NC
Posts: 20,902
thank you bcboy on the Fathers Day wishes,and congrads on your sober/clean time
can you think back on why you wanted to quit in the first place?On how bad it was?It may refresh your memory as to why you wanted to quit
can you think back on why you wanted to quit in the first place?On how bad it was?It may refresh your memory as to why you wanted to quit
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
bcboy:
Congratulations on 30 days clean. Apparently! You had a GOOD reason for stopping in the first place. WHAT WAS IT?? Take your mind back to those first few days of detoxing. How many times do you want to be in that time zone? I'm on my 152nd clean day off the opiates. I sure as HELL don't want to go back to those first few days of detoxing. NOT A PLEASANT PLACE TO BE FOR ANYONE!!! I can think more clearly. I laugh way more than I did on the opiates. I can drive a car w/o fear of going to jail for being pulled over and getting arrested for being on opiates. My entire family loves me more and wants to be around me now that I'm off the opiates. JUST SOME THINGS TO THINK ABOUT.
HAPPY FATHERS DAY TO YOU TOO. I've already wished my husband the same. We are headed to my parents today for some cooked ribs, he cooked on the smoker. Gotta wish my dad a great day in person.
TOD
Congratulations on 30 days clean. Apparently! You had a GOOD reason for stopping in the first place. WHAT WAS IT?? Take your mind back to those first few days of detoxing. How many times do you want to be in that time zone? I'm on my 152nd clean day off the opiates. I sure as HELL don't want to go back to those first few days of detoxing. NOT A PLEASANT PLACE TO BE FOR ANYONE!!! I can think more clearly. I laugh way more than I did on the opiates. I can drive a car w/o fear of going to jail for being pulled over and getting arrested for being on opiates. My entire family loves me more and wants to be around me now that I'm off the opiates. JUST SOME THINGS TO THINK ABOUT.
HAPPY FATHERS DAY TO YOU TOO. I've already wished my husband the same. We are headed to my parents today for some cooked ribs, he cooked on the smoker. Gotta wish my dad a great day in person.
TOD
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Whistler, British Columbia
Posts: 222
Well the reason why I quit was to make sure that my kids never see this type of environment period, I am better than this. They are all young and my chance is now to make sure that they never have a house with this inside like I had when I was a child.
But the reason why I am not in a good place right now is the changes with my wife.
On Saturday again we had family over and once again I was offered a drink and refused. After everyone was gone my wife started attacking me on this issue.
This is how it went down.
her - So you never plan to drink or anything ever again, your being rude to everyone.
me - nope that is the idea. I don't want our kids growing up like I did.
her - So your going to be like this from now on? Do you have some kind of problem or something?
me - as long as I don't drink, then their is no problem. I don't want my kids to think that my past behavior was acceptable.
her - Well they will find out one way or another.
me - ???
her - If you have a problem with drinking then I will tell them about your past habbits.
me - ??? speechless
It went downhill from there.
I never got a happy fathers day today, no card, nothing... This has never been a day that was forgotten in the past.
But the reason why I am not in a good place right now is the changes with my wife.
On Saturday again we had family over and once again I was offered a drink and refused. After everyone was gone my wife started attacking me on this issue.
This is how it went down.
her - So you never plan to drink or anything ever again, your being rude to everyone.
me - nope that is the idea. I don't want our kids growing up like I did.
her - So your going to be like this from now on? Do you have some kind of problem or something?
me - as long as I don't drink, then their is no problem. I don't want my kids to think that my past behavior was acceptable.
her - Well they will find out one way or another.
me - ???
her - If you have a problem with drinking then I will tell them about your past habbits.
me - ??? speechless
It went downhill from there.
I never got a happy fathers day today, no card, nothing... This has never been a day that was forgotten in the past.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Whistler, British Columbia
Posts: 222
Originally Posted by eleanor 
I'm sorry bcboy. Just know that YOU ARE doing the right thing for your children and yourself. Sounds like your partner isn't too comfortable with the changes. Is she a drink/user too? Happy Father's Day.
Never was a smoker. That was my thing.
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
HAPPY FATHER'S DAY BCBOY!!!!!!!! My husband and I were laughing about this day this morning. Long story short! We dated for a summer. When I was 15 and he was 17. His mother sent him to live with his father. Thirty-two years later! His cousin put him on the phone with me, because he was also going thru a divorce. We didn't have a clue who we were talking to. Two months later on Father's Day! I remembered him telling me he had a daughter. So I called him to wish him a Happy Father's Day. I was the only one to call him that day. His daughter didn't even call him. We started talking from that day forward. We've been together for four years now. Been married one of them. So we were laughing today, and talking about how we ended up where we are today with a phone call on this very day four years ago. Just a story I wanted to share.
Maybe you need to have a talk with your wife about your decision that you are going to STOP using anything mood altering. If she feels the need to tell your children, then guess what? You AREN'T using now. So BIG DEAL! They are getting a much more loveable and caring father for your decision. If the need to apologize to the family members is in order for your decision, then tell them.
IT'S YOUR LIFE! YOU DO FOR YOURSELF WHAT YOU FEEL IS BEST! Apparently your wife doesn't want you sober for some reason. Just guessing at this! There's actually a country and western song out there about this same thing.
I stayed loaded on opiates for six years. I mean heavily loaded! My husband at the time, told me every week for six years, we needed to separate and get a divorce. When I finally went CT off the meds and got myself cleaned up. I knew the marriage was over. The only reason we stayed together was due to my drug use. So I moved out and filed for a divorce. He was livid. He tried his damndest to get me back. But I knew that wasn't the life I wanted to live and got out of it. I'm super happy now and enjoying my life and marriage with my summertime sweetheart. I'm not saying here you need to get a divorce. I'm just saying the opiates kept me in that marriage way longer than I would have been w/o them.
We all as recovering addicts need to take care of ourselves first. We only have this life to live in. So be good to yourself.
TOD
Maybe you need to have a talk with your wife about your decision that you are going to STOP using anything mood altering. If she feels the need to tell your children, then guess what? You AREN'T using now. So BIG DEAL! They are getting a much more loveable and caring father for your decision. If the need to apologize to the family members is in order for your decision, then tell them.
IT'S YOUR LIFE! YOU DO FOR YOURSELF WHAT YOU FEEL IS BEST! Apparently your wife doesn't want you sober for some reason. Just guessing at this! There's actually a country and western song out there about this same thing.
I stayed loaded on opiates for six years. I mean heavily loaded! My husband at the time, told me every week for six years, we needed to separate and get a divorce. When I finally went CT off the meds and got myself cleaned up. I knew the marriage was over. The only reason we stayed together was due to my drug use. So I moved out and filed for a divorce. He was livid. He tried his damndest to get me back. But I knew that wasn't the life I wanted to live and got out of it. I'm super happy now and enjoying my life and marriage with my summertime sweetheart. I'm not saying here you need to get a divorce. I'm just saying the opiates kept me in that marriage way longer than I would have been w/o them.
We all as recovering addicts need to take care of ourselves first. We only have this life to live in. So be good to yourself.
TOD
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 35
Well it was a good fathers day. Got cards from all of my kids and wife. My only daughter is the biggest impressed with my new found sobriety and wrote some very nice things to me in her card. I called my dad to wish him happy fathers day despite he hasn't been talking to me for 4 weeks. He was mad about how bad I had become and quit talking to me for two weeks. Told my mother I quit drinking two or three days into my sobriety hoping for him to cool his jets. It took him almost two weeks into my sobriety for him to talk to me and wish me happy fathers dayl
Everyone seems behind me which scares the hell out of me to slip. I hope that day never comesl
Everyone seems behind me which scares the hell out of me to slip. I hope that day never comesl
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