Margareth

Last week we got a text from a friend telling us he was going to get married.
Since we were in a way instrumental for them to hook back up after a short separation we were over the moon to hear this but what was not so good was that of course hubby was expected to attend the stag night.

Now, were we live this is an alcohol drenched event and there is a huge amount of peer pressure to partake in the mayhem so naturally this caused some anxiety to both of us and I was halfway deciding that maybe what was called for was a "controlled falling of the wagon event".

That way we could get passed the stag night and be prepared to help each other get passed the first week after. It would be a severe case of choosing the best of two bad things but I knew that there would be no way to get passed this one sober if hubby was going to be there unprepared for the onslaught.

Now before you go yeah, yeah bear with me OK? We have been here before and got passed it somehow because we were both aware of the dangers lurking and our out of control drinking which caused us to decide that drinking ceased being fun were not related to these events.

However.... and this is huge for me, when I broached the subjects my husband had this big smile on his face ad said, " Sorted." No worries, I'm going to be the designated sober driver!"

I'm so proud of him.

Usually I'm the one who has to come up with these tricks to avoid having to drink because of peer pressure.

He didn't like the idea to have to lie about his alcoholism and this way he solves a lot of problems. He could be honest to our friend be at his stag do and solve the peer pressure thing because if there is one thing more important than getting everybody smack faced over here it is to find someone who is prepared to stay sober in order to avoid police scrutiny and this will garner him a great deal of goodwill during the entire day this event is planned.

I have no doubt about his capacity to resist the urge because that was never that much of a problem for him.

I on the other hand had to be very mature because of course my little alcoholic me was happily awake in the background to take advantage of the situation but I have no doubt it will subside with time again.

Just so that I'm clear here by the way, I do not under any circumstances promote the "controlled falling of the wagon event". For all intends and purposes it's a non existing issue. If you're an alcoholic do not even entertain the thought OK?

Dee74

I'm glad you and your husband are doing so well, Margareth.

Just for the record, as an Aussie and a near neighbour I think the societal/peer pressure to drink at a stag night is a load of BS.

I bought into it for many years but at this stage of my life I'm very happy to declare that nothing or noone makes me drink

D

Margareth

I agree but my husband does feel pressured and is quite sensitive to peer pressure. He was raised a chameleon having to deal with Methodist T-totalling parents, his father a minister, and his peers and the need to fit in.

My pride is in that he found his own solution to deal with both the peer pressure and his own need to not drink and the fact that we both found a way to stay sober in the face of what maybe two months ago would have lead to an all out binge.