Hi There
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
Hi There
Hello. I have been lurking on this site for a long while and decided to go ahead and sign up. My husband is an alcoholic and has been for a very long time. After one horrible night he did some pretty bad things and will now have some legal battles in front of him. He did make the huge step of checking in and really participating in an inpatient rehab and after almost a month of being out of there is doing great as far as drinking goes.
The problem lies in that I am so bitter about all of this that I find myself just wanting him to leave. I have two young kids, so I know that is not the best if he is going to make an honest effort, which he seems to be. It is just that his temper is bad (not taking meds until he sees doctor/psychologist who does tests and can correctly tell him which ones to take, as this is also a problem for him mixed w/drinking). Not horrible like hit someone, but yelling an just having fits for small reasons, which has been a stress for my oldest daughter (10). He does have the testing tomorrow and will see the Dr. soon after. I know the correct meds will help his horrible anxiety which he has had since childhood.
Does anyone else just feel empty like they have used up all the good they could feel for this person?? I am trying but for the life of me feel bitter and suspect I would be happier w/out him, but I dont want to ruin life for my kids more than it has already been.
So wow, I am sorry to just jump in here with all of this. I just feel like this is a safe place to come and see really good feedback and thought maybe I could get the opinion of people who have possibly walked this same path.
Thank you so much. Prayers and Blessings to all on this board that dont even know how much of a help they are just by posting their stories.
The problem lies in that I am so bitter about all of this that I find myself just wanting him to leave. I have two young kids, so I know that is not the best if he is going to make an honest effort, which he seems to be. It is just that his temper is bad (not taking meds until he sees doctor/psychologist who does tests and can correctly tell him which ones to take, as this is also a problem for him mixed w/drinking). Not horrible like hit someone, but yelling an just having fits for small reasons, which has been a stress for my oldest daughter (10). He does have the testing tomorrow and will see the Dr. soon after. I know the correct meds will help his horrible anxiety which he has had since childhood.
Does anyone else just feel empty like they have used up all the good they could feel for this person?? I am trying but for the life of me feel bitter and suspect I would be happier w/out him, but I dont want to ruin life for my kids more than it has already been.
So wow, I am sorry to just jump in here with all of this. I just feel like this is a safe place to come and see really good feedback and thought maybe I could get the opinion of people who have possibly walked this same path.
Thank you so much. Prayers and Blessings to all on this board that dont even know how much of a help they are just by posting their stories.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 3,335
I grew up in a house where my parents yelled and fought all the time. We always walked on egg shells around my father. I love my parents but it was horrible at times. The experience had a lasting effect on me and is probably one of the reasons I started drinking and partying at an early age.
(((Hugs))) to your children. And welcome to you. I wish you strength.
A child who lives with criticism, learns to condemn.
A child who lives with hostility, learns to fight.
A child who lives with ridicule, learns to be shy.
A child who lives with shame, learns to feel guilty.
A child who lives with tolerance, learns to be patient.
A child who lives with encouragement, learns confidence.
A child who lives with praise, learns to appreciate.
A child who lives with fairness, learns justice.
A child who lives with security, learns to have faith.
A child who lives with approval, learns to like themselves.
A child who lives with acceptance and friendship, learns to find love in the world.
A child who lives with hostility, learns to fight.
A child who lives with ridicule, learns to be shy.
A child who lives with shame, learns to feel guilty.
A child who lives with tolerance, learns to be patient.
A child who lives with encouragement, learns confidence.
A child who lives with praise, learns to appreciate.
A child who lives with fairness, learns justice.
A child who lives with security, learns to have faith.
A child who lives with approval, learns to like themselves.
A child who lives with acceptance and friendship, learns to find love in the world.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 112
You are in the right place, and yes I often felt I had used up all the good I had in me to keep my family together. In fact I still feel empty, but in time I will fill that void with the love for myself. Baby steps but it will work. Hang in there
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