K2x

This is my second time here... and hopefully this will be my last time in the Newcomers section. I have been a consistent drinker for nearly 8 years now but drank on weekends the 3 years before that while in college. I drink strictly beer, usually a consistent 2/night. My problem is that it's every night. I can certainly go a night without a beer, but I do enjoy beer and it seems to be a good punctuation mark on the end of my work day; a beer with dinner, and a beer as dessert.

My wife and I were talking the other day though and I realized that it bothers her, particularly when she told me that it's sad that my son learned to count to 12 by helping me put beer bottles into the refrigerator. SHE IS RIGHT. That's a horrible example to set for my son and he has been around it for 4 years now. He means more to me than the bottle. My wife means more to me than the bottle. And my relationship with Christ means more to me than the bottle.

It's funny, I can sit at work (Senior Level Web Developer) and listen to podcast after podcast from my favorite churches around the nation, this after sitting through church on Sunday, but find no guilt in using alcohol to relax me. No, I'm not a religious freak --- I am still young in my path to Christ but I find that His love for all of us is energizing.

So - today I start my journey again. I have about 7 beers left in the fridge right now that upon ending this post I will be discarding into the trash can outside. My true challenge will come in hanging out with my friends. We do a lot of work on cars and usually there's beer and food involved. That will be my challenge but I am a challenge, goal-driven individual so I'm hoping that I can win this one, this time.

Any advice is always welcome. Thanks for reading.

Day 1 starts now.

least

Welcome to SR, our recovery family from all over the world. :ghug3

Do check out the many other forums, there are forums for all people from all walks of life. I'm glad you found us.

Dee74

Hi Kx2

It sounds like you have some very good reasons for success.
You find a lot of support here too

Welcome
D

artsoul

Hi K2x- I commend you for be willing to change your drinking habits, especially if it's a potential problem in your relationships. You sound like you have a deep faith to help you, and that's great.

Impurrfect

Welcome to SR!!

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

K2x

Thank you all for the responses! I have already made that commitment to change my drinking habits --- the habit of 2 of day will now become a habit of 0 a day. I print and cut out sayings to motivate me and placed them all throughout the house, in the bathroom, on my computer monitor, in my truck and even on the old beer drawer. Today she asked me "what the hell is going on?" I told her I was done drinking. 8 years of drinking every day, I'm challenging myself to see how much better I'll feel by drinking nothing. Her first question was "What about when you hang out with your car buddies?" I said - no drinking. She smiled and asked how I was gonna do it. I told her because I have you, the kids and my Savior to work for.

I just pray that I can do it this time. Worldly things will constantly try to pull us all from His path. These things, like alcohol, give us immediate gratification and blind us from realizing our long term fulfillment we can receive through Christ and through living a life dedicated to Him and not to ourselves. Day in, day out we hear commercials about what we can do for us --- but I do believe that's not really why we're here. I am still learning all of this myself and trust me, I'm no Saint and definitely no preacher. Just sharing what's going on in my heart right now. But I'm trying my best to shift my gaze from the bottle to better things.

Thanks again for the support!!!

NewBeginning010

Glad to have you back try to stay a little closer to SR if you can. Sharing & posting your thoughts & challanges can do a lot for you.

Plus you have God on your side

All of the best,

NB

K2x

Day 4 - come and gone. :bounce Having a little anxiety today. In the middle of an episode right now where I feel like I just CANNOT get a deep breath (that I need). I can only think that it's from the cleansing phase.

Not gonna lie. My body just feels................. cleaner. Hard to explain. Can't wait to see what 20 or 30 days feels like!

Horselover

Just read your threaad K2x and you can certainly do this. You have a lot of power on your side. Remember that the beer is not your friend and will do you no favors in the long run.

I have to relate this to you because it was a pang for me reading about your child's counting and it was just before I sobered up. My Mom was throwing a pretend party and asked my son what they should buy for the party. My son said a box of wine. My son was 5 years old at the time. Makes me sad to even think of it now, but super grateful to know that at age 7 alcohol is not considered necessary to have a party in his mind. He's forgotten and so shall yours.

K2x

Thanks Horselover! Always good to hear of others success stories. This place really does help give you strength to do this. Hearing other's stories - good and bad (I actually think the bad stories help me more - they scare me).

How long have you been sober from the wine now?

Horselover

2 years and I drank everyday starting at an early happy hour of 4 pm. Thank God its over! I can understand about the good and bad stories and the bad helping more. I can get scared straight here too some days. For the Grace of God there go I. Very true and meaningful statement around this place. No one is better then another for sure.

K2x

Day 6 just got kicked in the teeth. Only way I know how to deal with it is to joke a bit. I'm not gonna lie... yesterday/Friday, after a long and challenging work week, on the way home I was craving a cold beer. But I didn't stop and get any. If it's not at my house, I won't drink it so that is my goal - to just keep it out - and keep winning the battle, one day at a time.

coffeenut

Welcome to SR. The gift of a sober Dad is one your son will only benefit from.

Keep coming back.

northfork

nightly beers after work were my thing too for years, but i got used to going without them pretty quickly. For the first 40 nights or so I drank a cup or two of herbal tea after dinner, and that routine seemed to help me.

yeahgr8

Senior web developer hey? I'm online marketing manager, contractor...you know those guys that come in and start asking annoying questions about the structure of the site and what can be changed and then start commenting about the coding with the obvious coding knowledge of a chimp...cue your eye roll hehe

Anyways took going to AA for me, go for it and get sober...put a caveat on this time to get sober...if you maintain long term good and happy sobriety...brilliant...if you don't spare your kid logging into children of alcoholic parents forum and them having to go to f2f counselling and meetings and you go instead:-)

Soph

I have to agree with yeahgr8 - AA is helping me too. The power I feel when everyone holds hands at the end of every meeting, the love in the room...to me it's God in the room and in our hearts and it is keeping me sober. I am on Day 40. I still have cravings too. But working the Steps is helping, having a sponsor, and reading reading reading the Big Book and other books.

Way to go for deciding to change your life. My son is now 13 and they grow up very quickly. I sure remember being hungover and being at birthday parties. Awful. You can avoid all that!!

Soph

K2x

Thanks again for all the positive feedback and reinforcement. I beat a major hurdle today - and actually came near footsteps from caving. My wife and I decided to go grocery shopping together at a new high-end grocery store in the area. This new store has a hold section for cheeses and they really have some unique things for this small city. We decided to indulge and splurge on a $4.50 tiny little chunk of Applewood Cheddar cheese. As we were walking past the wines, I told my wife - let's get a wine to go with our cheese and this way we'll have a great pairing for the cheese. I pointed the cart toward the isle and caught myself (in my head) saying, a glass of wine won't break your commitment - you're not even a wine drinker anyway.

And then I stopped and realized that at only 7 days in, I was making an excuse. I think that ONE DAY, I MAY be able to have a glass of wine and some cheese, but that day isn't now... and quite frankly probably won't be for a long time (if ever).

I was proud for not caving and for continuing to win. I feel much better and got to spend some great quality time with my wife and kids today as we took a 6 mile bike ride on a river-side trail. A great weekend indeed!

Day 7, you almost got me... but not this time. Day 7! ONE WEEK! YA BABY!

K2x

9 days with no drinking! :rock:

I even went to the store with my wife and got some fresh cherries and made my first ever smoothie the other day. It was actually pretty good --- a little weird with pieces of cherry floating around (got a think about chunks in my drinks), but it tasted good. Just trying to find some flavorful alternatives to beer because water and coca-cola get old. I've also dipped in to LifeWater which is provides a nice splash of flavors.

Good luck to everyone else that is on this journey at the same time as I am! WE CAN DO IT! WE ARE STRONGER THAN THE CRAVINGS!

artsoul

K2x - Way to go on getting through 9 days! I like the idea of making interesting, flavorful drinks. Anything we can do to get interested in a new way of living. Are you feeling good? It sounds like you are! I'm so glad to be over that first week and starting to feel the good kind of energy (instead of the "every-nerve-is-protesting" kind of feeling during withdrawals. Keep it up!

dkayvins125

K2X welcome to SR. A lot of good wisdom and wonderful people on this board. Congrats on the decision to quit drinking. Spend a lot of time reading these posts and learn from them. I am on my 6th time around and this time it has cost me almost everything.
Once again welcome
Dean