Alcohol Induced Psychosis or Extreme Panic Attack
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 11
Alcohol Induced Psychosis or Extreme Panic Attack
So, I screwed up bigtime and Im back to day 2. I made it 9 days last up until last Tuesday, but tricked myself into thinking it was safe to drink again. That night, I drank 5 beers and 7 ounces of vodka. Pretty tame by normal standards. The next day I felt so guilty and depressed about it, my solution was to drink again. This time I had 7 beers and 13 ounces of Vodka.
As you can imagine, i felt pretty terrible the day after that. Even though i was feeling depressed and hung over, I still managed to get my bike fixed and went for a good 3 hour ride, which helped elevate my mood. As soon as i got back home though, i started to get the anxiety feelings again. I had a class to go to that night, but I convinced myself that I wouldnt be able to handle and my anxiety would take over.
Big mistake because I then went and drank about 13 beers and fell asleep. It was one of the most restless sleeps ever and I felt horrible about it. What did I do when I got up, well I decided to finish the left over beers from the night before. Great way to start a productive day. As soon as I finished those 4 or 5, off to the liquor store it was to get another 18 pack. Driving drunk on a Friday afternoon in rush hour traffic. How genius of me. So I continued to drink the beers. Up until around midnight and I realized the beer wasnt going to cut it. The liquor store was closed so i called the friendly neighborhood bootlegger and got a 26 ounce bottle of vodka delivered to the house. Drank 3 quarters of that and passed out.
Woke up the next day and drank the rest of the bottle in the afternoon and passed out until later that night. Got up and headed out for another bottle. Drank the entire thing and passed out once again. The next day, my sister and brother in law, who I live with were coming back from a 4 day trip. Guess its time to straighten up my act right. Not a chance, after a massive binge like that, my mind was racing, I was shaking and wanting to jump out of my skin.
So I drank some more vodka and slowly drank beers until they got home. Was pissed drunk by this time and there was no way I was hiding it. Passed out and acted a fool in front of them during dinner. So i passed out early in the evening, only to awake at around 11 pm, feeling terrible and the only way to feel better is to drink.
Woke up yesterday morning, and I was a complete mess. there was no way I could **** this day away. I was sweating and pacing around the place, damn near shaking and going crazy. Finally I broke down and told my sister how I was feeling. I didnt mention how much I had drank, but she mentioned that she knows I have an alcohol problem. She called a psychologist for me to talk to and I have an appointment for thursday.
Just writing all of this down makes me feel so pathetic. Im only 24 years old, how did I let things get this bad..... Ive had depression for a long time and started treating it witgh alcohol about 4 years ago. It didnt start with drinking alone. I just got so sick of embarrasing myself and acting a fool in front of people, that I came accustomed to drinking myself stupid alone. How said is it when I can brag about how good I am at getting up for work in the morning after downing a bottle of vodka....Thats nothing to be proud of.
I need help big time. Theres going to be changes and I need to start admitting my problems. Ive proven to myself time and time again that i cant do this on my own.
Thanks again for listening.
As you can imagine, i felt pretty terrible the day after that. Even though i was feeling depressed and hung over, I still managed to get my bike fixed and went for a good 3 hour ride, which helped elevate my mood. As soon as i got back home though, i started to get the anxiety feelings again. I had a class to go to that night, but I convinced myself that I wouldnt be able to handle and my anxiety would take over.
Big mistake because I then went and drank about 13 beers and fell asleep. It was one of the most restless sleeps ever and I felt horrible about it. What did I do when I got up, well I decided to finish the left over beers from the night before. Great way to start a productive day. As soon as I finished those 4 or 5, off to the liquor store it was to get another 18 pack. Driving drunk on a Friday afternoon in rush hour traffic. How genius of me. So I continued to drink the beers. Up until around midnight and I realized the beer wasnt going to cut it. The liquor store was closed so i called the friendly neighborhood bootlegger and got a 26 ounce bottle of vodka delivered to the house. Drank 3 quarters of that and passed out.
Woke up the next day and drank the rest of the bottle in the afternoon and passed out until later that night. Got up and headed out for another bottle. Drank the entire thing and passed out once again. The next day, my sister and brother in law, who I live with were coming back from a 4 day trip. Guess its time to straighten up my act right. Not a chance, after a massive binge like that, my mind was racing, I was shaking and wanting to jump out of my skin.
So I drank some more vodka and slowly drank beers until they got home. Was pissed drunk by this time and there was no way I was hiding it. Passed out and acted a fool in front of them during dinner. So i passed out early in the evening, only to awake at around 11 pm, feeling terrible and the only way to feel better is to drink.
Woke up yesterday morning, and I was a complete mess. there was no way I could **** this day away. I was sweating and pacing around the place, damn near shaking and going crazy. Finally I broke down and told my sister how I was feeling. I didnt mention how much I had drank, but she mentioned that she knows I have an alcohol problem. She called a psychologist for me to talk to and I have an appointment for thursday.
Just writing all of this down makes me feel so pathetic. Im only 24 years old, how did I let things get this bad..... Ive had depression for a long time and started treating it witgh alcohol about 4 years ago. It didnt start with drinking alone. I just got so sick of embarrasing myself and acting a fool in front of people, that I came accustomed to drinking myself stupid alone. How said is it when I can brag about how good I am at getting up for work in the morning after downing a bottle of vodka....Thats nothing to be proud of.
I need help big time. Theres going to be changes and I need to start admitting my problems. Ive proven to myself time and time again that i cant do this on my own.
Thanks again for listening.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,414
Hi again Silver Star
I'm not a doctor, but thats not alcohol induced psychosis as I've experienced it. It does sound like the after effects of a pretty hefty binge tho.
I hope you feel better now - do see a Dr ASAP if you're worried...and let us know what happens Thursday.
D
I'm not a doctor, but thats not alcohol induced psychosis as I've experienced it. It does sound like the after effects of a pretty hefty binge tho.
I hope you feel better now - do see a Dr ASAP if you're worried...and let us know what happens Thursday.
D
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 174
I drank in a similar fashion to you and I can relate to those kind of withdrawals. They ain't pretty and once they started for me I would get them every time I binged, and the only cure is to drink more.
Or...as I found...to not drink in the first place!
What I did and what I advise you to do is:
1 - Go to a doctor about the depression
2 - Get into some sort of recovery program - AA is working for me
3 - Realise and accept that drinking has become a huge problem for you
These things won't change your life overnight, but will give you the tools necessary to put yourself and your life back on track.
Good luck mate
Or...as I found...to not drink in the first place!
What I did and what I advise you to do is:
1 - Go to a doctor about the depression
2 - Get into some sort of recovery program - AA is working for me
3 - Realise and accept that drinking has become a huge problem for you
These things won't change your life overnight, but will give you the tools necessary to put yourself and your life back on track.
Good luck mate
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
I'm sorry and i'm glad you are getting help..before you get behind the wheel of a car, think and re-read your posts...and how you would feel if you caused an accident.
It took me much longer to realize that drinking exacerbated my depression which fueled more drinking which fueled more deeper depression....juust hang on for another day. Nine days was a good start, you can do it again.
It took me much longer to realize that drinking exacerbated my depression which fueled more drinking which fueled more deeper depression....juust hang on for another day. Nine days was a good start, you can do it again.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,491
I'm glad that you are going to see a psychologist. I also used alcohol to self-medicate depression and it became a horrible mess. I needed to get my depression properly treated before I could recover, because I really didn't care enough before that.
Definitely do whatever you can to help yourself get and stay sober. And, keep reading and posting here and let us know how you're doing.
Definitely do whatever you can to help yourself get and stay sober. And, keep reading and posting here and let us know how you're doing.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Buzz-free Zone
Posts: 1,372
Hello SS,
The vicious cycle...trying some controlled drinking, drinking to keep from feeling the nasty effects of drinking, rationalizing it can't be that bad if we can maintain a job, and on and on.
Please don't feel pathetic for getting honest with yourself (and us!). That's a step in the right direction.
So is seeing a therapist. Mine saved my life.
There's no glory in trying to conquer alcoholism on your own. Support is essential. Glad you're here. Please keep us posted on how it goes on Thursday.
The vicious cycle...trying some controlled drinking, drinking to keep from feeling the nasty effects of drinking, rationalizing it can't be that bad if we can maintain a job, and on and on.
Please don't feel pathetic for getting honest with yourself (and us!). That's a step in the right direction.
So is seeing a therapist. Mine saved my life.
There's no glory in trying to conquer alcoholism on your own. Support is essential. Glad you're here. Please keep us posted on how it goes on Thursday.
Attended By a Single Hound
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: England
Posts: 425
Originally Posted by SilverStar 
Just writing all of this down makes me feel so pathetic. Im only 24 years old, how did I let things get this bad.....
I need help big time. Theres going to be changes and I need to start admitting my problems. Ive proven to myself time and time again that i cant do this on my own.
Thanks again for listening.
I need help big time. Theres going to be changes and I need to start admitting my problems. Ive proven to myself time and time again that i cant do this on my own.
Thanks again for listening.
'Only' 24? I'm not even 23 yet and managed to fit in being a drunk, drug user and heroin addict
...everything is relative, depends who you compare yourself to. You don't have to be on your own. Maybe it's true we're born alone and die alone...but whether we live alone is up to us.
The difference between pschosis and a panic attack?
Personally, panic attakcs have me thinking I'm dying, psychosis had me taking a running jump of a bridge...
Stick around, mate.
-Tsu
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 2,058
Silver, I am glad you back on the wagon and are posting about your relapse. I haven't read the other posts because your post was all to real for me.
I walked in your shoes in terms of anxiety/depression/panic attacks and self medicating with booze. I had almost 3 months sober down before I thought I could handle one drink. I fell for that little voice and that false sense of security that I beat my addiction. Worked for a few weeks and I didn't get wrecked until I got injured and starting taking pain meds.
Meds and some serious depression from my physical state made me feel down and anxious. That's when my old friend alcohol wasn't just a drink here or there. It was a full handle being guzzled while on pain meds.
Vicious cycle it is indeed.....Anxiety - drink - more anxiety - more drink.....etc. Till I was shaking.....climbing the walls, just literally wanting the endless fear and dread to stop. I couldn't get beyond 10 minutes (unless I was passed out) before the anxiety returned. Looking around my house...and just wanting to die. I couldn't take it anymore. Finally it culminated in my racing heart and mind....that I needed more pills and booze. I don't remember too much as I was out of it man....I mean....lock me up out of it. Probably washed about 10 codeine down with a strong rum/coke. The rest of that day is a blur.
Point of sharing this my friend is that now you know. You can stop this permanently by remaining sober, working a program of recovery and seeking the aid of a Dr. to help you with your depression/anxiety.
I am not a Dr. but for me.....the alcohol brought about the anxiety. Even if it was there in small amounts before.....the alcohol worsened it to the point I felt like I needed to be sedated. Pacing, shaking, losing my mind, not finding one thing in my life I could focus on.
Know this.....SR is here 24/7 and when you have that smallest twinge or going to the bottle....post about it. I certainly do and with the aid of my counselor and SR....I am committed to never feeding the beast within again.
God Bless my friend. I am looking forward to you seeing this through.
I walked in your shoes in terms of anxiety/depression/panic attacks and self medicating with booze. I had almost 3 months sober down before I thought I could handle one drink. I fell for that little voice and that false sense of security that I beat my addiction. Worked for a few weeks and I didn't get wrecked until I got injured and starting taking pain meds.
Meds and some serious depression from my physical state made me feel down and anxious. That's when my old friend alcohol wasn't just a drink here or there. It was a full handle being guzzled while on pain meds.
Vicious cycle it is indeed.....Anxiety - drink - more anxiety - more drink.....etc. Till I was shaking.....climbing the walls, just literally wanting the endless fear and dread to stop. I couldn't get beyond 10 minutes (unless I was passed out) before the anxiety returned. Looking around my house...and just wanting to die. I couldn't take it anymore. Finally it culminated in my racing heart and mind....that I needed more pills and booze. I don't remember too much as I was out of it man....I mean....lock me up out of it. Probably washed about 10 codeine down with a strong rum/coke. The rest of that day is a blur.
Point of sharing this my friend is that now you know. You can stop this permanently by remaining sober, working a program of recovery and seeking the aid of a Dr. to help you with your depression/anxiety.
I am not a Dr. but for me.....the alcohol brought about the anxiety. Even if it was there in small amounts before.....the alcohol worsened it to the point I felt like I needed to be sedated. Pacing, shaking, losing my mind, not finding one thing in my life I could focus on.
Know this.....SR is here 24/7 and when you have that smallest twinge or going to the bottle....post about it. I certainly do and with the aid of my counselor and SR....I am committed to never feeding the beast within again.
God Bless my friend. I am looking forward to you seeing this through.
live to ride ride to live
Join Date: May 2007
Location: New England
Posts: 1,390
I had to go inpatient to get sober and my bipolar under control....you remind me of me with the binge drinking...no breaking the cycle on my own...do get some help ,,,,sober is much better than drunk and a mess...now I just deal with trying to stay healthy brain wise...good luck you can do it....
Guest
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 2,013
Thanks for posting mate. It brings it back to me pretty vividly.
The ship is going down but you frantically try to stay afloat for just a few more hours untill it's all over. Tears and hopelessness and the end of the binge. trying to work out what you damaged and who you p*ssed-off. Utter crap place to be.
The only way that I can say I won't drink-drive or get into those states ever again is by not taking that first drink 'just for today'. The only way for an alcoholic.
All The Best.
The ship is going down but you frantically try to stay afloat for just a few more hours untill it's all over. Tears and hopelessness and the end of the binge. trying to work out what you damaged and who you p*ssed-off. Utter crap place to be.
The only way that I can say I won't drink-drive or get into those states ever again is by not taking that first drink 'just for today'. The only way for an alcoholic.
All The Best.
non-drinker
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 13,839
I fooled myself for years thinking I had things "under control". Well, that "control" put me in the emergency room with a severe panic attack, questioning my own sanity. I never thought my beer drinking could lead me to such a dark and dismal place. Only by getting and staying sober has the light and fun come back into my life.
You have your whole life ahead of you, please don't waste it.
You have your whole life ahead of you, please don't waste it.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 1
Listen.
Im in the same boat as you, except im probly a lot younger, the person who wrote this: Hi again Silver Star
I'm not a doctor, but thats not alcohol induced psychosis as I've experienced it. It does sound like the after effects of a pretty hefty binge tho.
I hope you feel better now - do see a Dr ASAP if you're worried...and let us know what happens Thursday.
D
Is completely and utterly wrong and doesnt understand you one bit.
you have a problem as do I.
and it seems it is all driven by anxiety as you would agree.
i havnt found a soloution yet all I can say is. Anyone that belittles the problem, which you have probly found alot, TELL THEM WHERE TO GO!
also, please read this link I hope its as good a help for you as it is for me.
imes.com/2009/05/05/health/05brod.html
Good luck.
I'm not a doctor, but thats not alcohol induced psychosis as I've experienced it. It does sound like the after effects of a pretty hefty binge tho.
I hope you feel better now - do see a Dr ASAP if you're worried...and let us know what happens Thursday.
D
Is completely and utterly wrong and doesnt understand you one bit.
you have a problem as do I.
and it seems it is all driven by anxiety as you would agree.
i havnt found a soloution yet all I can say is. Anyone that belittles the problem, which you have probly found alot, TELL THEM WHERE TO GO!
also, please read this link I hope its as good a help for you as it is for me.
imes.com/2009/05/05/health/05brod.htmlGood luck.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,414
^ yeah, that would be me.
I can only share my experience.
I'm not really into diagnosing others. It's not something I'm remotely qualified for
Hopefully SilverStar did end up seeing someone who is qualified and is doing ok these days.
Welcome to SR
D
I can only share my experience.
I'm not really into diagnosing others. It's not something I'm remotely qualified for
Hopefully SilverStar did end up seeing someone who is qualified and is doing ok these days.
Welcome to SR
D
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