I am a broken record
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 100
I am a broken record
How many times to I have to say -
"I don't want to be with you if you drink"
"Stop drinking and we'll look at our future"
"Get some help and perhaps we can have a future"
Lorks a lordy!!! Is the man deaf or just stupid??
"I don't want to be with you if you drink"
"Stop drinking and we'll look at our future"
"Get some help and perhaps we can have a future"
Lorks a lordy!!! Is the man deaf or just stupid??
Curled up in a good book...
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 1,542
Normaeinstein, what are the consequences of ignoring these for him? It sounds as if he hears you just fine but refuses to stop drinking. So what will you do? Will you keep saying the same things over and over, expecting a different result? Nothing changes if nothing changes...
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Wizard Land Downunder
Posts: 2,615
I don't know if he is stupid or deaf, or just refuses to hear you, Normaeinstein.
I do know that you could do damage to your voicebox from telling him, long before he ever listens or takes note of what you are saying.
Maybe he looks at you constantly telling him this, like we do to A's telling us what to do...... as quacking.
As nothing has changed up to now, a change of plan seems indicated, like from doing something to stop him drinking, to just stop doing anything, and leave him be.
Maybe if you just tell him, "you do what you like, because I am through", and go NC on him, it may help both of you. The silence may say more to him than your voice in his ears, and you will be able to focus on yourself instead of on him.
God bless
I do know that you could do damage to your voicebox from telling him, long before he ever listens or takes note of what you are saying.
Maybe he looks at you constantly telling him this, like we do to A's telling us what to do...... as quacking.
As nothing has changed up to now, a change of plan seems indicated, like from doing something to stop him drinking, to just stop doing anything, and leave him be.
Maybe if you just tell him, "you do what you like, because I am through", and go NC on him, it may help both of you. The silence may say more to him than your voice in his ears, and you will be able to focus on yourself instead of on him.
God bless
Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Wizard Land Downunder
Posts: 2,615
Hon, it was just a thought that popped into my head. When the A keeps sounding off with the same stuff, over and over, let's face it I do switch off, don't hear past the first word and think "bloody quacking".
I just wondered if they hear us coming at them, time after time, with the same pleas to quit, if they don't think "nagging again", and switch off. After all this plea is the last thing they want to hear or take any notice of.
I know RABF could blot out me yelling and begging, just 1 inch from his ear, but almost hear and read my thoughts at other times. Nothing wrong with his ears or brain, so I assume he just didn't want to hear what I said.
When I went NC, it threw him completely.....later he said "the silence was deafening".
I am through trying to communicate with the defiantly deaf.
God bless
I just wondered if they hear us coming at them, time after time, with the same pleas to quit, if they don't think "nagging again", and switch off. After all this plea is the last thing they want to hear or take any notice of.
I know RABF could blot out me yelling and begging, just 1 inch from his ear, but almost hear and read my thoughts at other times. Nothing wrong with his ears or brain, so I assume he just didn't want to hear what I said.
When I went NC, it threw him completely.....later he said "the silence was deafening".
I am through trying to communicate with the defiantly deaf.
God bless
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